the chronicles of casablanca lily

sum of all fears :p

2005-09-25T18:33:00.000+08:00

several things all crammed up in one:

surayya's birthday celebration

finally all 4 of my sibs and our parents managed to celebrate baby's birthday yesterday. went to have japanese food and all of us eat tahap tak ingat punye! :p memang kenyang sungguhla! surayya got her usual toys (which as always, makes both my parents go 'oh my....') and hehe, a makeover! comel sangat biler tgk dia dimakeoverkan! she close her own colour plak tu! tak padan dgn kecik dah ada taste sendirik.. kaler nak yang terang saja! thank goodness she's fair kan :D she looks cute anyhoo :D tapi since this damn blog tak kasik i post those gambars, takpela next time i post em. hehe!

anyhoo i had a great time. really. it's great to go out and have fun with people who really care about you and, of course, spend some quality time together. Aww!

annual law dinner

or shall i call sesi mengambil gambar sakan? hehehee!! i had my fair share of fun too, getting to meet so many people, though i just buat tak tau jer kekadang.. bukan buat tak tau, sebab terlalu enjoy duduk kat meja sampai tak peka dengan keadaan sekeliling :p mana taknye makanan di depan mata kan, of course la kena meNGAP! we all makan tahap tak malu and tak ingat punye..

initially i wasnt in the mood to go to the dinner anyhoo, because i simply hate dinners. being to so many formal functions makes me yawn.. tak tambah lagi dengan the problem of finding clothes la, mekap la apa la kan... i hate those kinds of thing. makes me feel very insecure. so this time around i memang tak prepare apa2 pun and just pakai je apa yang ada (though nyaris terbeli the red dress that will make me look like VOOOM....) thanks to my mother's advice, pakai je la apa yang ada tanpa perlu membazir. which i do agree. takde point nye i nak spend bebanyakpun (which is also another good point raised by my roommate, elham). except that i pergi buat rambut jer (which BTW i wont let anyone do it for me anymore since i think i can do it by myself a whole lot better), i dont really spend at all kot. mekap pun sendiri je, ala2 biasa je... since i can do it by myself so malasla nak membazirkan duit :P bleh guna the money utk shopping raya nanti hehehe!!!

food was fair la. tak leh nak kata sedap sangat, tak leh nak kata tak sedap langsung. frankly my dear, so long as i managed to eat a whole lot out of it pun dah good enough! kira okay la tu kan :p kitorang dok maaaakkaannnn jerr and of course, mengambil gambar gedik (takde keje kitorang malam tu dok posing gedik jerr!!!) sesekali menggedikkan diri tak salah kan! hehehe! bila tgk gambar2 tu balik, tergelak2 juga! takpe la at least i had fun kan! seronok!

balik lewat. penat banget. terus terlelap! tapi i bangun pagi tau :p hehehehe...

tapi tak sumanye good bits la about the dinner. rasa sedih pun ada sebab kengkawan suma dah nak pergi dah.. tinggal laa kitorang yang tak berapa kerat ni jer kat sinih.. meneruskan perjuangan yang belum selesai. i cannot bear watching the slide show. sedih! tapi tengok jugak, and tahan airmata jugak. buangkan segala perasaan yang berselirat di hati, segala fikiran di minda, just savour everything for one last time.

all that i can say now is that, when it comes to my relationships with them, i just savour these last days that i have with them and keep on moving on :)

CONGRATS ALL!!

anecdote of the week: this is a learning process

this is the favourite sentence of almost all of our lecturers this week, beginning with kak zai, pn norila, pn. saudah, pn. azni and so forth... memula kalau tgk secara literal maybe kita tak akan faham, tapi apabila saya menganalisanye dengan teliti, fahamlah saya dengan apa yang mereka maksudkan. sekarang ni cuma nak my parents faham jer. hopefully!

hons ni definitely different daripada llb. llb dlu dok fokus ttg marks, all things on a piece of paper, all the assessments, whereby when you score, you feel at the top of the world. wanting to be the best. but it's not really the current situation anymore 2 me now.

thinking about it, i used to feel bummed whenever my marks are lower than the rest, when i was criticized with whatever that i was doing, tak boleh ditegur la gamaknye, in other words, ego tu agak terlampau la jugak (nasib tak tahap nenek lampir :p hehhe). but lately, i dont really think that i really do care anymore.

why do the lecturers betulkan kita? kenapa dia marah bila kita buat salah? kenapa kita dapat markah tak elok? dan, adakah markah tu penting? those are the questions that i kept on asking myself lately. apa yang penting sebenarnya?

then finally i found the answer. that the most important thing is that i actually do learn and understand the thing that i actually learned, sebab ini je la bekalan that our lecturers boleh bagi sementara all of us ada lagi kat sini. sementara kita ni belum lagi bekerja di luar. sebab life is not that schweet and simple out there. challenges are aplenty, in so many ways which one cannot imagine. dengan workloads, workplace, bosses, clients and haha, colleagues lagi, mana tak pening kepala kan? kalau skarang ni pun tak leh handle pressure, camana dengan working life nanti?

and i learnt that it's okay if i made a mistake. a mistake is a huge lesson in humility for me. tak salah kalau kita buat salah sebenarnya. sebab right now, we still have lecturers yang memperbetulkan our mistakes sementara diorang still boleh betulkan. malangnya most of the time, even i myself, susah nak nampak the reason why they actually they did that. they didnt do
that to you because they hate you, they did that because they want you to become a better person in future. future lawyers we were called. or so do we :p baik buat salah sekarang than i made a huge mistake in court resulting an innocent person being put in jail or millions of money being given to the wrong person or wrong calculations resulting in injustice. now is the right time for us to learn, the perfect time for us to gain whatever that we can in order to survive in the wild.

and i realize, that having a smart brain is not enough. yes it's good if you're smart, a bonus really, but not many were willing to learn, and those who were willing to learn, has humility attached to them and are not afraid to be corrected at those points will have a more successful career as litigators. practicing lawyers. and i do agree on that point. the examples are everywhere. and i admire that qualities in them.

little by little, i'm trying to change my perspective. to be more humble to my surroundings. i admit my mistakes. now i finally understand the underlying meaning of the words 'i stand corrected' in law. we learn new things every time, and we are not perfect. we're human anyhoo. we're not even practicing lawyers yet! this is only a small beginning for us, the road is far too long still!

so here i am, humbly submitted my thoughts, to be shared with all of you. May Allah bless my ways after this and with support from those people that i do love and care, i do hope that someday, in the words of Fadhlin, "i would finally be discovered".

sorry seems to be the hardest word

i dont want to write a public apology. why should i do so? i would sound so chicken-y, right? i know that the right solution to this matter is to see my friend and have a slow talk. smooth things out. i know what i did was wrong.

well, i dont know if my assessment was wrong or in yam and elham's word, i overthink about it way too much till all that i saw from it are only the bad bits. which is really sucky IMO. i don't know!

it all began when i found out about something which makes me question myself about this person, X, to befriend me. i know, who am i to judge x's sincerity, i'm only a human being as well right, having said that i did felt betrayed upon finding it out, but not that bad la since i think that never mind, let it fly away with the wind and if i just go on with my life and dont give much of a damn about this, then things would be okay. or so i thought.

then come the graduation day, which of course the day which i dedicated solely to my family who really wanted to see me receiving my scroll. i suspected something fishy is going on with x. maybe for some people, they might see it as a very minor thing, but for me, it's a big deal. oh come on, we're friends ok! for years even. how can i do that to x? but x did that to me. i dont know why x did that, but the bottom line is, i am so hurt. really hurt! initially i didnt feel the hurt at all because i didnt really give anything much of a thought since i got so many flowers and congratulatory wishes from so many ppl (even kak najah also congratulated me! thanks!!). i just you know, calm down and relax je la.

elham saw x's picture. i didnt want to. i only looked at it once when i uploaded it in my laptop and the moment i saw the photo, it scares me so i dont want to look at it. let my roommate zoomed the picture in even more hehehe... i don't know! i'm just freaked put and simply taknak tengok. and i just keep things real at least for a while although the confusion is there, until the day i returned home to KL and scrutinize it all by myself. seeing what is wrong with this X. who really, is X?

and i made my judgment: on X's sincerity, on X's behaviour, on X's ways of life. i don't know, upon my observation, i became even more confused. i dont know what should i do. i dont know what should i say! i dont even know X anymore!! who is X??????????????????

for a few days i gave it a thought in between things (me too, was pretty much occupied throughout the week tho i malas jugak la :p) and i don't know, i made this decision towards x, which resulting in me not wanting to look or talk or even catch a glance of X for a while since i am so confused and hurt! not that i dont care about our years of friendship or anything, it's just that i'm so confused myself i dont know how to handle it! i dont even know how to talk to X anymore! all that i can think of that time (even now, at least some bit of it la) that X is a big fat liar. manipulative person. a betrayer. who thinks of me as yet another bit of charitable works that would resulting in X feeling good about x's self i guess. and i decided that i dont need x's charity. i dont know! i feel like being cheated and slapped twice on my face! THAT shows how much i was hurt at that point.

i talked to elham, milia andyam about it. well... maybe there's the truth on x's behaviour, as in x hasnt shown the true x's self yet though the sparks of truth is kicking in (please let it out really soon!) but i shouldnt be too rude towards x. what if x's efforts are true and not staged like what i have thought? what if x's intention is so simple and not as complicated as i thought? i got a triple slap on my face la plak :p

never once i thought what would it feel like to be in X's shoes. of course la i never tried one okeh... but havent i even thought of it in a positive manner? why should i overanalyze things? complicating it, resulting in massive mess? and now one of my best fren pun terkena jugak. maybe x thought that she hasut me to make that decision or something. kesian plak. i never thought that this thing would turn up like this, since it's only between me and x. and i even told x that later we'll talk about it, but not now of course. busy! and i'm so confused!

now i feel so guilty. part of me wants to apologize to X, but the other part of me says that i should not apologize! but one thing for sure X and i should have a talk to see what is really going on. i'll do it soon. i promise. and i know a mere sorry is not enough, judging from the number of times that i've hurt X.

man, i hate when all these happens!

you are the apple of my eye :D

2005-09-22T20:05:00.000+08:00

yesterday was my baby sister's birthday. it's her 4th birthday and haha, i missed her birthday yet again! really sucks! i missed her dearly but since i have a test tomorrow, and due to the order from the higher authority, a.k.a. mom to not to return back to KL (and a promise that we'll be celebrating surayya's birthday on saturday) i said ok, hehehe :)

managed to sing her a song from my cellphone though hehehe :p anything for my little sister! when i asked her what that she wanted for her birthday, she said

"yiyi, baby nak beli la ni.. i want a car with a remote that can moves! (a remote control car)"

mak datuk bijaknye mulut dier bercakap! i always thought that she's pretty much like me, mulut tahap tak ingat! hehehe.. sama2 jalan lambat (kitorang dua2 bercakap dlu baru jalan :p), hantu tv, bad at physical activities, and the number one trait, LOVES PEOPLE!!! dia ni mmg agak tak malu sket la dgn orang, pakat redah je hehehe...

i hope for the best for her, wishing her all the best and, oh BUY LESS TOYS, PLEASE!!! mana nak letak all your toys ni baby oiiiiii!!!!! just imagine, she buys toys practically everyday and teh amount of toys that she has could make like 5 kids more than happy! me, my brother and adik punye mainan boleh dapat mainan dia sorang kalau dihimpun2 dia punya amount of toys! manalaa mummy and daddy tak pening kepala :p but she's the ultimate daddy's girl, so mintak apapun selalunye lepas kot (mom and dad got her when mom's 43 and dad's 51; a year and a half after they returned from Haj)..

anyhoo.. just enjoy some of my fav pics on the love of my life, the apple of my eye, the one who will knocks on my door every morning and screamed "YIYIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!" and my official TV buddy at home, farah nursurayya hj saad!

convo day: el edicion por mi amigos

2005-09-18T19:49:00.000+08:00

convocation day part 2: the unreleased

2005-09-18T19:41:00.000+08:00

convocation day 2005: family edition part one

2005-09-18T19:36:00.000+08:00

2005-09-18T19:28:00.000+08:00

A week has passed and I haven’t been writing on what happened on my convo day. Hehe… anyhoo I posted some of the pics here if any of you guys would like to see it, and everything went fine. Really.

It was a day meant to the most important people in my life: my family. I shall begin with mom since she’s the one I’ve known the longest.

Mom is the strongest person I have ever known. Yeah she is emotional at times but well.. she’s mom :p she did everything and anything to ensure that I have a good life. Protecting me from hurt of any kind (well… apart from her bebel-ing of course). She had a tough time after the split, which occurred like 17-18 years ago, but it never held her back. Instead, she moves forward and indeed, she’s my rock. She never beat or hit me. Not even once in my entire life. Though kena cubit tu ada la kot……. Tu pun boleh dibilang rasanya. She supported me through thick and thin, and I hate to see her sad. I hate to disappoint her. She gave her world to us and it is my responsibility to take care of her too. We did have our tough time once when I moved to SSP, but I did told her what I really think and hehe, we’re great. She always covers me up whenever I’m in trouble (which like, all the time… remember the first accident I had? She was the one who hid my car from being seen by Dad, but eventually Dad saw it and woohoo….. I cried a river!) and lifts me up when I’m down. Yes you cant expect her to talk softly and overly bersopan santun gitu (she’s a Malaccan who was raised in KL, so the language memang a tad kasar la… orang tak biasa memang tak tahan), but she has a very good heart. She was the one who told me to keep on moving on whenever I face so many obstacles, jangan buat jahat dengan orang walau macam mana jahatpun orang buat kat kita (which I often langgar jugak, yikes!), to pekakkan je telinga tu kalau orang dok bercerita pasal kita ke apa ke. Untuk terus maju ke hadapan. Bersabar dalam apa jugak keadaan (which I fail to do again!). learn to forgive others. And of course, to put my studies at the utmost priority. Although sometimes her once-every-15-minutes call every Friday evening (or any day in which I’ll be returning home) makes me rimas jugak, but at least there is someone who will wait for me at home, worrying to bits on “lily ni dah sampai ke…. Kat mana laaa budak ni… Ibuk, Lily ada telefon tak?”…. it’s simply heaven. And I love her to death :)

Dad. He became my dad like for more than half of the age that I lived in. he’s the father that I know for almost entire life. He schooled me and gave me everything that I wanted. Being supportive in everything I do. Always just in his actions. Fair towards all. Tapi sekali dia sound tu….. alamak, kalah Mama! Hehe… always up with all those interesting intelligent questions that made me thought ‘ man, there are so many things that I do not know in my life!’. From him I learn on how to be a diplomat, or wakil rakyat, or in other words, how to handle people. His most overused phrase “mai la makan nasik kat umah….” Sampai kitorang suma dah bleh hafal! Hehehe… he’s too baik. Really. Sangat baik. He gave me this new life that I never thought that I would have. He taught me on responsibility very, very much. He’s very good in mengambil hati orang, and his kindness goes beyond that. Highly intellectual, from hi I picked up the habit to read even more, in order to learn more; skills that I need in order for me to survive in the real world. i simply couldn’t ask for more.

My wonderful sibs, though there are times we do bicker, but I know there are times that they do think it’s hard to be my sister. To measure up with things (though actually, they are better persons than I do! Neat, hardworking, simply wonderful!)

And as you realize, yep the amount of words that I typed got lesser and lesser every paragraph. Because I just cant stop myself from crying. Thinking on these wonderful people makes me think: what that I can actually do for them?

My parents often say, “maybe we don’t have much money, and we have nothing to leave you, but education is the most valuable thing that we both gave you in order for you to have a better life. Even better than now”. And that is the only thing that I can actually do!

Of course, Nenek came to my convo too. Judging from her physical appearances, indeed she is getting smaller and smaller. Even adik is bigger and taller than granny nowadays. But it really make my day to see her in the hall with mom during my convo :D love you too :) Dad has a meeting on that day but he did went to my convo as well, though he has t get back to the office after that.. sorry daddy!!! But I do appreciate it!!! Really!!!!

To all my friends who came and supported me, and all those wonderful wishes and flowers that I received that day, thank you so much! Next convo nak bunga lagi.. hehe!!!

To all my lecturers, thank you for everything. To put up with my mood swings and hehe, my issue of sleepiness in class ( I could win a trophy for that one!). thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

One chapter in my life is completed. There are a lot more to go!

full house lyrics

2005-09-09T16:08:00.000+08:00

eegads i am so addicted over this korean drama. have a post relating this one oredi in my notebook, tapi takpe la that one bleh dipost later... anyway i found the lyrics of this song kat internet and man, i cant stop myself from singing to it! (though my vocals are of limited range, ie sumbang :p)

Why? (Unmyeong) OST Full House
Sarang el jalmore gesso
Irohge dagaul julnen mulasso
nei maem jo chado sarang apyo sonen nette deiro andwe..

Irol jul arat to ramyeon
cham buto shijak haji do anhasso
babo cho rem ije wa so ya nan
dwi nejen hu hwi rel hago isso...

chorus:
Niga sarangi dweji ankhirel birosso
no manen choldero ani girel birosso
non sarangi anilgo rago sudo
obshi narel sukyo wasso...

jamshi secheo ganen in yeon igil baresso
apen sangcheo man nei gei nam gyo jiltei nikka
hajiman al myeon sodo no ei moden goshi yokshimina
jakku sel peo jyo..

jal mot dwen shi jaki rago
ke roh ge swibge seng gak hessot nen dei
on je den borilso issel go rago nan mi dossonende..

ottohgei nan he ya halji
odiso butoga chal mut dwel konji
ni sarang el piheya ha nende
ni moden gei no mu ke ri wo jyo..

chorus:
Niga sarangi dweji ankhirel birosso
no manen choldero ani girel birosso
non sarangi anilgo rago sudo
obshi narel sukyo wasso...

jamshi secheo ganen in yeon igil baresso
apen sangcheo man nei gei nam gyo jiltei nikka
hajiman al myeon sodo no ei moden goshi yokshimina

ijen no animyeon amu ei mi obt nende
ijen nado narel ocheol suga obt nende
norelji wo ya man han da nen sa shil deli onel do nal..

do him del gei he..

life is a rollercoaster that you just got to ride it

2005-09-05T10:38:00.000+08:00

waddup!!!! i'm finally at home! maybe ada kat kl sampai saturday.. ke nak lajakkan je cuti ni sampai sunday, ie rehearsal day? i dunno! tengok je la nanti kan! banyak sangat2 benda yang nak diceritakan sampai tak tau nak pick which story! ingatkan nak type kat my laptop baru post kat sinih tapi this old comp still guna OS 98 so tak leh masuk thumbdrive la plak.. and i still xtau cane nak adjust the internet settings yet so malasla... type je kat sini, sama jugak kan! hehehehe :p

ok back to the posts!

Life. Inc.
i guess i should start with what i consider as one of the biggest news that i have received throughout the year. bigger than anything la. bigger than finding out about marriages, my identity, supposedly rumors about myself (which oh BTW please ask me first before starting to spread things out, it might turned out not the 'news' that you actually expected it to be), pregnancies and so forth. this one is bigger than that, and it concerns someone that i really love.

i shall not forget last saturday for this year. that was the day that i dicovered that my grandmother is diagnosed with a terminal illness that sooner or later will result with her being away forever. it all began when my mother, my sisters, baby's ibuk and me were on our way to chinatown after finishing our lunch at bora ombak and i asked my mother about my grandmother's conditions. that was the point when she told me that grandma is diagnosed with it. if she discovered this 5 months back then something might be done.

what was the first thing i did? i was like, "oh". and cried la. tapi kena laa cover2 sket sbb nak kuar ye tak... kang tak larat plak nak dgr my mother marah sbb take things too much into heart. i try to rationalize myself and look at things differently. bawa bertenang banyak2.

i wonder how my mom accepts this news well. she seems calm and moves on as usual. pelik juga. even nenekpun rilek je (of course la she didnt know about it at all, the doctor explained it in english). siap bleh gi orang kawen lagi tu. nampak sihat lagi la. but there is a possibility that her tiny frame will shrink even more and more and... well..

so i talked to mom last night and told her that i was so worried. and i wonder how does she react over all these things. then she told me that when things happen, it will happen and we cannot change it. we should accept it instead and live with it. she told me about our nek su who had brain cancer but survives the treatment and lives on until today (in fact, i just met my nek su yesterday. surayya and i even sent her home. she couldn't be better). and also the developments of grandma's ilness' treatments makes it sounds as if she only got a high fever or something. mom is so optimistic over the whole thing. the only thing that worries her is when my grandma sakit teruk and tak bleh jalan or just laid down flat. THAT worries her. so long as she is happy and can do things as usual, my mother is more than thankful. dia plak kata "kalau ko risau2 camni lagi, mama tak nak laa citer apa2 lagi dah"... so there it was la. my mom is definitely my pillar of strength, undoubtedly.

as the saying goes, behind the grey clouds there's always a silver lining. it's open for us to look deeply into it and once we finds it, we'll be more than grateful. may Allah gives me more strength to survive in such a difficult time like this. and for the time being, i'm simply grateful. really.

anger management, anyone?
i don't know! my temper was rising like hell. my pms syndrome took its toll towards everyone! and that moment i realize that i succumb to pressure. i don't have time for anyone else. i don't even have time for myself! i took the mantra 'mind your own business' a lil bit too far and it results in me being someone which many has never seen. i turned into a monster. physically as well, as my veins dah start timbul, particularly on my left hand (which shows me my pressure poin, if i'm fine then takde apapun la. but if i'm not fine, hahahaha.... all the urat hijau akan keluar berselirat on my rather fair side of my hand (i have weird skintones, i told you guys already kan). and hahaha guess what, yep, the urat2 dah start to timbul oredi. and on that point i started to get worried.

i assessed myself thourghout the week and the question "who am i" appears every time. even elham says that i'm quite difficult to be assessed since i am made of a chameleon of different personality. i change myself in a blink of an eye! ever so easily pulak tu. kesian plak katt all those supposedly my victims. tak pasal2 je kena kan.. i was worried about them. i was worried about myself too. yes i'm being honest but little do i know that some might not be able to handle my honesty. or might get hurt over my blunt statements. i say things without thinking thoroughly before saying things. maybe i feel relieved because i don't lie anymore, but..?

maybe i'm better suited as the diplomat i guess. that image suits the current situation much better kot. i dont know. but i'm trying to grow up. this is indeed an experience for me. and everything happens for a reason, right? so it all depends on me on how should i handle this thing and whether i should sink or swim, kan?

i'm opening my eyes ever so widely.open to all possibilities. the world is my oyster. savour it. (wait, i dont like kerangs and man now oysters??? ok ok it's just a saying la farah ;p).

wedding bells yet again

congrats to mekni @ rawani mohd razali, my house captain when i was in form 5 in SSP cum my dorm mate who's gonna get married on september 18th! cool green emerald! tak sangka sesangat yang mekni akan kawen awal. so terkejut bila dapat message dia. i still havent replied yet sbb i'm simply speechless. i am so happy for her! sangat hepi!!!!

wow. things really have changed since 1999 kan?

ok, now who's next???

indeed they're an item

hehe... apparently thariq and miah are! memang terkejut beruk saye dibuatnye sbb miah is my hsemates and i didnt see that coming! (man i took the whole mind my own business way too far lah!). hope for the best for both of them. GAMBATE!!!!! congrats!

one heck of a night

i havent been doing kerja gila2 for like so long until last friday.. gamble dgn yam and elham nak tgk konsert af which, haha kitorang tak dapat mask sbb gate dah tutup (sigh) and then kitorang end up gi funfair instead (hehehe!!!!) and jenjalan keliling shah alam tu (ok elham i know i owe you a nando's meal!!!) and then tgk wayang dgn yam after dropping elham home (sibuk dgn assignments katanya) and kitorang tgk janji joni kat bukit raja. personally i enjoyed the movie sbb it's of a different genre. takde sappy romance stories that tried to swipe off your feet or anything equivalent to it, memang btol la, kalau all these independent movie makers begin to make movies, memang you'll find such a refreshing thing! i personally would like to watch it again if i have the time.

another movie to take note is kiamat sudah dekat. part comedy, part teachings, seronok btol tgk how do they handle things. saprol is hilarious!

i've already bought the dvd for charlie and the chocolate factory tapi kerana gambar tak chunnn, i decided to watch it at the cinema instead.jap gi laa kot keluar tgk :D

gotta pen off for now. more updates when i feel like updating!

hoho.. i'm back baby ;p

2005-08-22T13:48:00.000+08:00

Time: 10.00PM
Place: my room, keramat, KL
Current thoughts: Remedies assignment (editing the final draft, which would take ages because of my meticulousness and cerewetness, hehehe) and macam2 Aznil :p (oh wait, the show begins at 10, right? MOM, ASTRO RIA PLEASE!!!!!!)
Mood: in love with cute babies :D

All right. 2 hours have passed. Had dinner and watch good TV (hehehe... I simply love that color box!) And getting back in the mood of editing and revising my civil procedure notes for Wednesday’s test (thanks Pn. Suzaini!!!). Ah, the joys of being home I guess. Leaving all the stress behind me and doing things my way at my own pace (oh wait, I do this all the time so nothing new!) and hehehe, liberty to stay up as late as I like in front of the TV without worrying, not even one bit! And visits to the fridge to get my iced cool water at my own pleasure (I miss drinking cold water, asik2 minum air suam pun boring jugak kan? Hehehe).

This week has been one heck of a see-saw for me. Going through one moment to another, happy days, shocking revelations, painful heartache, worrying to bits, and hell yeah, and a whole bunch of work in tow. my mind is awfully clobbered one of these days. I don’t know if people close to me realizes this, but I’ve been keeping several things to myself lately. And I know that it’s not good for my mind. I hate to keep things, I normally express how I feel just like that. It’s just me I guess.

Never mind. I won’t talk about that one first, just sharing some of the (good) highlights of the week!

a) kitorang dah start kelas dgn kak zai for criminal procedure. I love her class. Dah brapa tahun kan blajar dgn kak zai so dah faham sangat2 her method of teaching. Very straightforward. Sangat mudah difahami. And banyak membantu mengorganizekan minda yang serabut!

Tapi mendengarkan cerita kak zai ttg Latino intruders yang datang malam2 tu agak menakutkan juga. Yela kami ni sakan saja stay sampai malam hari buat kerja ye tak. Nanti kalau jadi apa2 bahaya tu. Apapun ada juga baiknya gak amik langkah berjaga – jaga kan?

b) Trip ke Bar Council on Wednesday. Good news: no class for the whole day. Bad bits: we have to wait like almost an hour baru bas datang. Dahla panas ye tak. Sabar jela. Dah lama tak merasa riding on a bus for a class trip. Seronok juga, though I have to say here that my mind lately is more business-minded or academic-focused rather than before so probably in a way I’m becoming more of an ice queen than the usual Mak Cik Gayah that I’m always been known as. Why is that so? Oh, we’ll see if I have the time to talk about it.

The talk is quite interesting, though I pretty much wished that the manner which the Q and A question session being conducted could be improved by a mile. I guess all these long winding questions do get into my nerves one of these days. I think it’s best if questions were asked in a brief, straight-to-the-point manner. The audience won’t be that blurred (oh come on, who wont be falling asleep during a talk? Some people did fell asleep during Friday prayers that I saw on TV [my grandma is a huge fan of khutbah jumaat, she always listens to that] and as for me, in classes where I would keep my mouth shut. Memang sah tido. My urge to talk came from the need of having more oxygen into my lungs so that my brain would perform its functions as always, if not better), and the speakers would be more than accommodating to answer all the uncertainties that the audiences actually do have.

Ok, seems like a long ramble huh? Anyway, we have to practically run as fast as we can to the bus stop once the talk is over since it was raining in KL at that time. Dahla lepas tu kena berebut2 naik bas kan, hahaha. Memula agak tension juga sbb kena tolak dek orang semata2 nak naik bus kan, tapi bila difikirkan balik, oh well… just yet something that I can remember when I’m older I guess. Ada laa jugak tough experiences sket.. takdela everything runs smoothly tahap tak ingat kan hehehehe!!!!!

c) I’m falling in love again! Hehe.. silly I, falling head over heels with the Korean Drama called Full House. I guess I’ll write more nanti la kan, sebab I can ramble on and on regarding how much the hero has the qualities of a man that I long wished for. But Rain is not that handsome la… though he is tall and has that cute smile. Other than that he looked just plain. Wow I’m harsh, am I? hehehe!

d) getting to see cute babies coming to my home this weekend!!! All 3 of them are so cute! 2 of them are actually twins! All boys! Hehe! It’s great to have baby boys in our home, since my siblings are mostly girls anyway (hehehe!)

grandma turned out ok, not as bad as I have been worrying to bits the other day. Though I still do worry about her jugak. I think the best way is to cheer her up and just listen je kot (although her constant nagging on me getting married has become a living legend, which is why I avoided to be in the kitchen when the makcik makciks came just now. I need earplugs whenever marriage questions are asked!).

Surayya? She’s the ultimate Mawi fan. She drags Mawi magazines, wanting to be a performer, even kissed Mawi’s pictures! She’ll watch Mawi attentively on the television. And as always, she’ll show me all her new toys and such. Mummy even bought her a kiddie drum set! I never had one of those when I was younger. I was a goody-goody kid back then! (but I did have my share of pranks too, but nothing major!). I haven’t seen her for only 2 weeks and I think she grew a lot! Camana plak kalau tak balik sebulan? That’s a lot! Sometimes I forgot that my baby sister is almost 4! Her birthday is on September 21. we are both each other’s TV buddies! At least there is one of my siblings who will watch TV with me all the time!
e) I am quite proud of myself upon realizing the fact that I can count quite well! My schoolmates should have known how much I detest mathematics. I would find so many reasons to skip classes and not doing homework for math! But upon force from the higher authority, I must do all the boring calculations. And handing in my schoolwork. UGH! It’s a wonder I managed to pass my additional mathematics paper back then.

And I thought by studying law, I wont be looking at those numbers anymore. No more calculator-grabbing days. And those mind-boggling formulas that I despise. Surprise, surprise. Things appear at the most unlikely places. Comes in Solicitor’s Account, NCLM and Remedies! Man, numbers, AGAIN??? I hate numbers. I hate formulas. All those weird calculation I learned in high school, what is the use of it? I just don’t get it sometimes. It’s boring, boring and boring!

Having said that, I have to learn all these new formulas or else I’ll fail my exams and test and assignments and so forth. Surprisingly I can actually count quite ok la, although not as good as the rest of my classmates but still, I can prove to myself that once I put my head into something it can actually work! Now I love those subjects :D and I love counting as well!

There are more of these coming in as well but, well, I guess I need a new post for that one! See ya!

Can any of you see that the veins in my head are actually popping out??

2005-08-10T17:47:00.000+08:00

ugh. the damn haze. sakit jiwa btol biler terpaksa hadapi benda2 sumer nih. tension nak belajar lagi, tension dengan environment lagi, apatah lagi dengan kerja yang tak pernah nak mensikitkan dirinya. UGH!!!!!

tapi i try my very best utk tidak meletup. be in control with my surroundings. we are the ones yang selayaknye menentukan hala tuju hidup kita sendir kan, bukannya orang lain ye tak? little pressures kicks in je bukannya apa pun ye tak, hehehe. lagipun semua orang kena hadapi benda yang sama. fair enough, right? heheh :D

sakit hati tentang benda2 lain pun ada jugak. sapa kata tak ada kan. tapi saya cuba utk menghadapinya dengan matang. though perasaan nak makan orang tu pun kekadang ada jugak. have you seen ally mcbeal? those thoughts inside ally's head keep on popping inside my head tatkala wajah wajah itu melintasi pandangan mata yang dikaburi jerebu ni. UGH, yet again. ye la, macam yang pernah saya tegaskan sebelum ni, sometimes people know about my life even more than i know. mengarut betul, cerita ikut sedap hati sahaja. entahlah. mungkin saya akan bersemuka dengan mereka yang berkenaan pada hari yang tepat sebab saya sangat sbuk sekarang. biar kita clarifykan benda2 ni supaya benda2 ni tak berlarutan. sebab saya sedih sangat. ada ke patut buat orang camtu.

talked to elham yet again yesterday morning about it. yela nak mengadu kat sapa lagi te tak, kalau citer dgn mak saya mau mak saya membebel panjang nanti and huhuhu buat drama airmata laa aku :(( mungkin ada benarnya saya tak perlu marah. tak perlulah memperbesarkan benda. takpela kalau camtu. saya akan tanya mereka sendirilah. tak sedap hati sangat2 bila melihat sinar2 kemarahan, sinar2 kemenyampahan, and whatever sinar lah. sedih!!!!!!!

bulan ni memang soheh laa kopak giler. duit dinner lah, bayar all those summons lah, memang spring laa my budget this month! so please, jangan laa mintak apa2 dengan saya. memang saya takde duit skarang. UGH. lagi plak biler dapat tau yang kitorang kena gi seminar kat bar council next week, kena bayar rm15. bengkek gue! terbang lagi laa duitku!!!!!! (anyone bleh rekakan excuse utk saya so that takyah gi that seminar thingy????)

ok laa, enough with those depressing thoughts. cool stuffs that actually make my day (or week, or month, or year even):

a) mawi wins akademi fantasia!!!! i was so happy! this was the first time i actually voted for a contestant tau. previously i don't give much of a damn when it comes to all these reality tv competition ni suma, judging from what happened to previous winners, asal menang je mula la lupa diri and all kan.. pastu populariti pun ala ala suam2 air paip kan... apart from vince, farah and adam, i dont think yang lain2 tu meletup la.. harap glemer kat tv masa af tu jela, hahaha... hopefully aura mawi ni akan melekat laa sampai bila2 kan... takde la sampai takat ni jer.. and mawi pun kena laa lagi rajin belajar utk memantapkan lagi suara anugerah Allah tu.. memang payah nak cari malaysian singers yang bersuara jantan cam mawi nih. so all the best mawi!

macam2 teori orang formulated utk mawi ni. as in camana la malaysians bleh jatuh cinta dengan mawi ni kan.. termasuk laa saya nih. minat tahap tak ingat jugak la hehehe :p nak buat camana ye tak! tapi ada gak konsert2 yang dia nyanyi tak best juga. personally saya ske time dia nyanyi gadis melayu, nour el ain, memori cinta luka, PUPUS (one of his best), pergi tak kembali and oso lagu masa konsert final :D kalau nak bagi ranking of course final paling best hehehe!!!!! tapi tak leh lupa ;aa dia masa nyanyi lagu pupus tu sbb dengan saya saya skali terasa kesedihan dan kesengsaraan mawi masa tu. (takpe mawi, kalau takde orang tak nak kat awak, saya ada.. hehehe!!! alamak, kang yam marah plak... sori yam! okok mawi is yours :D)

pendek kata, MAWI WORLD!!!!!!!

b) at last, saya beli jugak birthday present utk diri sendiri tahun ni. setelah berbulan2 bersabar kan :p i bought myself a brand new compaq laptop yang memang soheh menerbangkan duitku! tapi nak buat camana susahlaa kalau takde laptop, keje like 16 hours per day in the office ni kan.. tensi gue! it's more of a necessity than a luxury. almost everyone has one. kerja tak pernah nak menyusut punye. so kena laa beli jugak. thanks kat my frens jugak yang tolong mengajar camana nak mengsetupkan menatang ni.. ye laa dah lama tak bekerja dengan benda ni suma so agak lupa laa kan.. lagipun technology changes like every milisecond, tak terkejar jugak saya ni kekadang!

all in all, i'm in love with my new baby yang masih lagi belum diberi nama. ada cadangan utk nama laptop saye? keta saya namanye ahmad, laptop ni belum diberi nama lagi. tunggu jela :D

c) study was ok alhamdulillah.. cuma rasa cam banyak sangat belajar benda and takde masa nak stadi thoroughly. tapi takpe banyak masa lagi kan... so i should belajar lah!!! organize my time wisely :D

d) insyaAllah konvo 12 september nih.. monday petang :D nak bunge lily sebanyak banyaknye bleh? heheh!!

ok i think i should have just stop here. kena sambung buat keje nclm ni balik. hai laa checklist!!!!!!!

the emancipation of me?

2005-07-31T17:23:00.000+08:00

hi all! tadi dah type berjela dah skali dora tershut down computer.. hehehe takpe2 karang kitorang sue tgh tgk gambar badak cute plak... thanks to akis! hehehe.. uih prepare presentation remedies laa.. skali memblogkan diri hehehe!!! i havent been writing for so long nowadays... banyak factors yang menyebabkan saya tidak dapat nak meluangkan masa menulis kat sinih.. bukan tak nak menulis lagi ke merajuk ke apa ke.. tapi ada beberapa sebab dan perkara yang perlu dipertimbangkan ye tak...

first reason: VERY obvious, sangat bz dengan kerja. sesiapa saja yang kenal saya musti tau yang saya sangat mementngkan kerja dalam hirdup. kalau takde kerja tu bukan saya la... sounds liek a hamba kerja plak kan? takde la.. this time around, assessment kitorang lebih banyak kepada groupwork.... so memangla kena meticulous sket.. surat takde satu dot pun sya dah bising, coding salah kena typ balik, borang salah isi kena isi suma balik semula.... uih tu laa dia ujian bkerja skarang.. kitorang yang sanagt sempoi ni pun terpaksala mencerewetkan diri demi pn azni and puan saudah.. hehehe.. takpe tu kan experience kan!!!!

2ndly: saya mendengar. saya menerima. saya berfikir. peh ala2 veni vedi vinci la plak.. hehehe!! takdela... sebenarnye saya tengah berfikir tentang diri sendiri, as in me blogging lah. sebabnye begini, adakah saya menulis kat sini utk diri saya sendiri or hendak mempleasekan orang? do i really have my own peace of mind? really? why am i writing here? why should i divulge the private information of my life to others? if i do so then cam saya nye life ni tak ada rahsia langsung. and how honest do i sound? am i being honest about my writings or tulis sesaja je so that i could be someone that i'm not? itu adalah antara teguran2 yang saya dengar and saya terima dengan hati yang terbuka. dan saya mula memikirkannya. am i being honest here? am i writing the truth? betol ker apa yang aku buat nih? am i nuts????

should i keep myself and my thoughts a secret from anyone? should i cover all my feelings of love, hate, anger, sadness, jealousy, gluttony (hehehe), ego yadda yadda yadda? i don't really know. i think it's a normal think of myself to thnik and behave that way. i'm just being normal kot. normal people do behave that way. but does normal people talk about themselves the way i'm writing right now? am i being normal? am i questioning my normalcy?

entahla... tu la antara benda2 yang menghantui saya dan otak saya sekarang ni. tu la pasal yang dah lama tak menulis tuuu... kekadang ada benarnya dalam hidup ni kita kena sentiasa berhati2 dalam melakukan sebarang tindakan. banyak benda yang kita kena take into consideration. banyak sangatlah! i'm sick of it sometimes. can't i just go on with my lif without having to think of all these? boleh tak? why can't i just be as expressive as i am? why should i be the normal diplomat?

speaking of being a diplomat, my close frens ramai jugak yang memberitau yang they learnt how to be a diplomat from me, the renowned otak manipulative politician. hehehe.. kekadang saya sendiri pun tak sedar yang saya ni ala2 politician jugak in that sense ;p but does that amounts to me not being my true self? if my true self is the eternal politician bolehkah mereka faham? bolehkah mereka terima? itu satu challenge utk diri saya jugak. sebab about two weeks back kot rasanye ada one of my frens yg ada msg me kata ttg me being berpura2. kinda pelik juga, tapi bila difikirkan balik maybe dia ada kecik hati dgn saya tu.. i'm so sorry but i just have to do it at that time. memang ada rasa nak tanya dia whether dia kecik hati dgn saya ke sampai dia kata saya berpura2 tu.. tapi disebabkan kerja yang menimbun tu kan.. tak jadi la plak nak bertanya. takpela lain kali erk.

ttg my class... i have to give credit to all my clasmates! diorang sangat best! seronok angat dalam kelas ni :D we are all a very fun and happy bunch. memang la stress sebab banyak sangat kerja kan.. tapi stress tu sumanye hilang bila dengar hilai tawa dan lawak jenaka suma orang. we take things one step at a time. this aplies to my firm mates oso! kekadang takut jugak kalau terrrmarah diorang ke apa ke... but all in all, i've never felt this happy in months! maybe because i'm now doing something that i really love \:) i lov working!!!!

ok that's all for now.. i must be going back to reading my article!! tata!

life thru a pigeonhole

2005-07-17T12:31:00.000+08:00

lamanye tak dapat nak bercerita kat sinih.. knowing me the penglipur lara sure ada jerr laa citer yang i would like to share with others kan... tapi biasa laa there are some yang boleh diceritakan and some are not.. hehehehe... tapi ok la kan.. kata diary ye tak...

i'm now the senior partner of farah and partners. ll.b hons 1B group 4. first2 takut jugak nak join environment yang baru ni tapi sekali dah join rasa best la plak. starting to mingle around oredi and pendek kata our class memang hepi and meriah la.. maklum jela sume orang takde keje lagi kan so sedang menghepikan diri je la kitorang ni hehehe.. tunggu jela next week biler keje dah start masuk kan.. hehehe :D

agak sibuk juga erk timetable kitorang.. tapi i'm trying to do things one at a time so that takdela terkejar2 and enjoy every single minute of my life sebab ever second counts now. kekadang kita tak sedar betapa preciousnye time tu sehinggala kita mengalami peristiwa pahit dalam hidup. chewah berfalsampah plak saye arini..
ye la.. my life changes nowadays. my routine pun berubah, my lifestyle berubah, even my thoughts pun ada perubahan juga.. mungkin betul juga.. usia mematangkan kita kan! kita makin sedar akan apa tanggungjawab and priority kita :D

a few things happened throughout the week, which includes the whole fiasco dekat frenster tu (rasanya the whole batch tau kot).. me myself only found out on thrusday so memang sangat baru tau and a tad bummed juga sebab i dont understand the whole thing. memang tak faham. tak tau nak baca cerita yang mana. tak tau nak nilai macam mana. sebab it is in my nature utk berkawan dengan sume orang and bila dah jadi camtu, of course i'm stuck in a dilemma upon deciding what is my stand on the matter ye tak. sebab saya pun tak nak la dilabel sebagai lalang, ie tak ada pendirian, or sokong orang secara mudah tanpa memikirkan isu sebenar secara total. nyaris demam panas saya hari jumaatnye tu, selepas membaca kenyataan - kenyataan balas yang ditulis oleh ramai orang. memang blank la. lagi plak dgr orang dok bercerita macam2 kan.

sampai la malamnye tu saya berfikir panjang sama ada nak benda ni effect my life atau tidak. sebab terlalu banyak berfikir pasal benda ni hanya akan memudaratkan diri saya sendiri ye tak. saya cuba susun segala2 yang saya faham tentang permasalahan itu. dan yang penting, apa effectnye kepada diri saya. dan saya akhirnye sampai ke satu kesimpulan: kenapa pula saya harus demam kerana masalah orang lain? biarlah mereka menyelesaikan permasalahan sesama mereka secara baik, dan walaupun i'm friends with everyone, all that i can say right now is that biarlah mereka menyelesaikan sendiri permasalahan antara mereka. saya sebagai orang luar tidak perlu ambil tahu. cukuplah sekadar mendoakan yang terbaik untuk mereka, kan?

i just want to have my own piece of mind and by staying away from all this conflict thingy, saya boleh hidup dengan aman and concentrate more on my firmmates and assignments and of course, myself :) so that is my stand on that matter. saya tak mau masuk campur sebab itu bukan urusan saya. dan setiap tindakan yang diambil, tak kira betul ataupun tidak, perlu kena pada tempatnya. perlu kena dengan salurannya. perlu kena pada masanya. dan saya percaya tindakan saya adalah tepat untuk kali ini. dengan lebih menumpukan tentang diri saya sendiri. i love myself!

wow ingatkan sikit jer nak citer pasal benda tuh.. skali panjang la plak!! hehehe anyhoo sesiapapun yang baca blog ni kali ni akan perasan bahawa ada 2 keping gambar keanu reeves kat post saya kali ni. cuba teka kenapa? hehehe yes i do have a crush on keanu reeves!! lama dah sebenarnye.. and i did printed those pics few years back masa skola form 5 sebab masa tu saya kemaruk tengok the matrix!!! hehehehe i still remembered those days masa duduk kat ssp tuh... ingat lagi farina pakai specks and trenchcoat ala2 matrix... heheh.. gi tengok citer matrix dgn petite and ezleen rasanye kat klcc tu.. i think i watched it on the 2nd day dia kuar wayang kot sbb masa tu kitorang dibenarkan balik rumah.. and malam tu tgk konsert kru lagi hehehe... hai sakan jugak saya ni yek.. hehe tapi takdelaa enjoy terlampau sebab saya bawak adik saya skali tau.. hehehe

basically the matrix ni masa di awal kemunculannye masa tahun 1999 tu memang banyak membawa perubahan la terhadap teknologi pembikinan filem,. storyline sume2 tu la.. just imagine, a low budget movie boleh dapat hasil macam tu kan! best! best!! saya boleh tengok citer ni beratus2 kali and still tak bosan!!! i have the cd of the movie kat section 7 tu kalau ada sesapa yang nak pinjam hehehe.. memang pendek kata addicted gile la!!!!
musti korang heran, apa demamnye si farah ni tulih citer pasal the matrix masa skarang ni? well.. anybody seen tv3 recently? diorang tayangkan balik the matrix!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yayayayayya!! just imagine me and my senyum gatal tengok citer tu (tho takde la tgk full sbb elham pasang citer korea and then i retreated into my room for an hour for my thought reconstruction.. and writing to a certain friend later on).. and bile nampak je muka si keanu tu depan tv mula laaaa tersengih2 ala2 gatal gitu!!!! woohoo!!!!! i still would be very muka gatal whenever i see this movie. sampai ke besok paginye tu pun dok tersengeh2 lagi sbb tengok NEO!!!!!! heheheheh....

ok laa.. i think that is all for now.. have loadsa things to be done and saya kena balik awal ke shah alam arini so.. TATA!!!

erase me. can you?

2005-07-11T21:25:00.000+08:00

initially dah lama dah nak tulih review citer eternal sunshine of a spotless mind nih, tapi disebabkan saya tak tengok lagi dia nye dvd version so saya tunggu dlu laa.. sebab takut tersilap komen ke apa ke kan.... but today okeh laa i write about it erk!

a friend of mine got me this dvd even though i didnt ask that fren to buy it for me. nak bayar balik pun dia kata tak payah so... saya dapat dvd baru lah heheheh.. which makes me wonder whether my fren tu baca my blog kah sampai dia tau yang saya memang cari dvd citer ni. sbb as far as i can remember i only told my fren about this movie masa tengah tgk tv and main sms nampak iklan citer ni so i said "kalau minat citer yang storyline dia pelik, tgk la citer nih." serba salah gak nak amik mula2 tapi dah orang bagi kena amik jugak ye tak, lagi pun no harms inflicted. thanks buddy!

balik2 rumah 7 tuh sume orang dah melepak di ruang tamu (heheh i know i balik lewat daripada waktu yang sepatutnye, tapi baru kol 3 petang lebih kan) anyhoo biler diorang tau jer ada dvd citer nih yam pun kata "ohh.. citer tuh".. then i asked "sakan erk aku promote citer nih kat blog aku yam?" and she said yes. heheheh so sori pembaca blog sekalian sebab saya sakan promote pasal citer ni kat blog nih.. manalaa tau if you guys tak minat citer nih langsung. even my fren yang kasik dvd nih pun kata citer ni slow and dia tak paham apa2 at the end. takpe nanti saya citer balik kat dia apakah sebenarnye storiline citer yang memang original and pening sket ni... tapi rasanye ramai juga yang ske movie ni rasanye.. sbb it is something new. something original. and por fin we finally we get to see the real jim carrey, as in no plastic faces yadda yadda yadda.

eternal sunshine of the spotless mind. will our minds be freed from all guilt, sadness,a nger and all the negativity once it is deleted from our system? can it be done? what are the implications? what are the results? will it actually work? those are the questions that charlie kaufman (the writer for being john malkovich) tried to answer in his best work to date. the title of this movie is taken from a poem written by alexander pope entitled quoted from the poem Eloisa to Abelard. simple things happen in life: people meet, they fall in love, suffer a depressing heartbreak and tried to forget the person in order to move on with their life. having said that, knowing charlie kafman and his unique way of storytelling, he wouldn't take the light and easy way. instead, he twisted the storyline into something else that you yourself could never have thought. at least.

This is the story of a guy, Joel (Jim Carrey),who discovers that his long-time girlfriend, Clementine (Kate Winslet),has undergone a psychiatrist's (Tom Wilkinson)experimental procedure in which all of her memory of Joel is removed, after the couple has tried for years to get their relationship working fluidly. Frustrated by the idea of still being in love with a woman who doesn't remember their time together, Joel agrees to undergo the procedure as well, to erase his memories of Clementine. The film, which takes place mostly within Joel's mind, follows his memories of Clementine backwards in time as each recent memory is replaced, and the procedure then goes on to the previous one, which is likewise seen, and then erased. Once the process starts, however, Joel realizes he doesn't really want to forget Clementine, so he starts smuggling her away into parts of his memory where she doesn't belong which alters other things about his memories as well.

basically that is the story. the opening credits of this movie only appears like at the 18th minute of the movie, whereby the opening scene began in the future where joel already has his memories of clementine erased from his head, having no idea whatsoever, he went to montauk and met the blue-haired clementine (kate winslet changed her haircolour like 5 times in this movie, thanks to numerous wigs) at the train. the two bonded instantly and spend two days together with each other. enjoying his company, clem wanted to crash at joel's place and when she went into her apartment to get her toothbrush, patrick, a worker of lacuna inc recognized joel and asked him what was he doing? joel, having no idea who this guy is just went blank. and then the credits started rolling.

here we discovered what actually were the events which lead joel to make one decision which he regrets: to erase clementine from his mind, with help from dr. mierzwak. this decision was made upon his discovery of clementine has been erasing him from her mind. basically we were all taken into this warped world of joel's mind, whereby his history with clementine unfolds backwards, from the moment they parted ways up to the minute they actually met. having said that, in between the process, joel has a change of heart and started to smuggle clem into his mind. simply stated that he just cant get clem out of his head. he imagined clem as his nanny la, childhood fren la sume2 tu la... sebab he wants to keep clem, tapi last2 terpaksa jugak dihilangkan memory tu... tapi after all the processes tu pun, last2 diorang ni jumpa balik and thanks to mary, former receptionist kat lacuna inc tu, diorang dengar their own tape recording yang menceritakan yang diorang tu were actually together. haaa tu dia....

there is absolute chemistry between jim and kate. jim gave his best performance yet 9though i do think his performance in the truman show pun equally best) and kate is zany and at times flaky ;p heheheh best best!!!!

ada gak subplot lain dalam citer tu, as in si patrick tu stole joel's identity in order to get clem and mary's own discovery of herself taht actually she had an affair with dr. mierzwak. sedih gak part ni.

senang citer, it shows us the awful truth of people's feelings and emotions. taht you cant just delete one person's memory inside your head in order to move on. instead there are lessons learnt from it and we should live with it, whether we like it or not.

sounds like something i've experienced anyway..... write about this soon... sebab keje banyak la heheheh!!!

happy birthday mom!

2005-07-09T17:30:00.000+08:00

left to right: sabri, daddy, baby, mummy, me and adik buat posing centerspread tu :)):)) heheh!

hi all! sorry for not updating things lately amat busy dengan pelbagai benda dalam kehidupan seharian. banyak urusan yang hendak diselesaikan. anyhoo the pic above was taken during my mother's birthday on july 6th. ngehngeh mak dapat sampai 2 besday cake tuh.. ada laa makan makanan kecil kecilan dalam umah kitorang tu je.. all of us had fun :p though i got into trouble jugak la sbb my hp wasnt working and the whole family were like, "where the hell have you been throughout the day???" sebab paginye saya ke uitm buat registration, ok jer phoneline tuh.. tau2 petang maxis buiat keje gile dia kan.. orang call tak dapat memanjang.. hampehs btol :p

all in all, it's the mom appreciation day la aritu. as always, mom, we all love you even though we have to put up with your constant yelling and leter-ing (hehehee) and sometimes emo oso.. tapi mak lagilaa kena menyabarkan diri dgn ragam kitorang2 dalam umah ni ha kan! lagi pening tu... macam2 hal ada :p whatever it is, we all love you, in a way no other person can imagine. i couldnt ask for a better mom than you. i remembered one day masa kelas en adlan, dia tanye which one would you choose between money and your mom, i answered "definitely mother since you can have as much money as you like, but you can only have one mother". and it applies perfectly.

i'm out of words right now. wishing you years of happiness and serenity, with all of us loving and adoring you forever and always!

sometimes people know more about me than myself

2005-06-30T14:30:00.000+08:00

KENYATAAN UMUM TENTANG PERKARA - PERKARA YANG BERLAKU DLAM KEHIDUPAN SEORANG YANG BERNAMA FARAH NORLAILY

(okok malas la nak guna ayat proper... tulis using my own personal style of writing.. after all, this is my diary right? hahahahaha)

1. I went to proton service centre near my house (heheh mmg slalu anta servis kat situ pun) and didn’t realize that even the guy yg jaga counter tu pun dah bleh ingat my face! :)):)) dahla kiut plak tu (tinggi ok seronok mata ni memandang.. cuma rambut dia curly lah..and gigi tak comel... tapi dia ala2 botak :p) seronok plak bercerita dgn mamat tuh :p but anyhoo bagus tau kalu kita anta servis keta ni sendiri.. belajar ttg apa yang ada dalam kereta kita. something yang kita takkan belajar masa blaja memandu (I know.. masa memula blaja teori tu banyak tido jer :p) so that nanti if your car broke down, you bleh figure out what to do and not freaking out like a mad woman (or in my case, calling a friend cum my unofficial yellow pages :p). anyhoo lama gaklaa tersadai kat kedai tu. dengan kepenatan jugak la menunggu kan.. tapi all in all, my Ahmad (my car) feels refreshed (not totally though, I haven’t bathe him yet, nanti la ye Ahmad...) and bankrupt jugak la I membayarnye.. though takde la semahal service centre yang lain kat situ.. eheheh!!

2. I just feel like clarifying things here, sbb I didn’t realize that ramai gak orang yang baca blog ni.. I thought cuma sorang dua yang sama je baca the blog.. I mean I do have blogpatrol tapi still tak reti nak figure out those ip addresses. and I said I’m a good cyber law student!! (takpe2 nanti belajar balik dgn kak zai!) tapi tu laa.. tak sangke la plak what that has been written here in this blog dah sampai ke orang luar blog.. wah dasat sungguh networking warga2 blog sekalian :D tapi takpe la farah tak kisah pun.. at least I can be honest about things and takde laa orang kata saya ni backstab orang ker apa ker kan ye tak.. it's good to be honest :)

alamak2 point dah lari la plak.. ni suma gara2 dok cerita pasal ramai penyebar2 blog stori nun.. eheheheh.. tapi takde dun wori saya tak marah.. cuma adalah lebih baik kalau you all tanye saya personally to confirm the news ker apa ker yang you guys baca... yela kekadang kita ni human being, being imaginative, macam2 benda kita boleh conclude by just reading few verses in a prose, essay, yadda yadda yadda. and it's even more intriguing bile apa yang korang baca tu adalah diary orang (whoa ada stori lagi pasal diary ni tapi takpe nanti saya citer lagi ok!!) jadi saya lebih ske apabila you guys tanye saya direct. tak susah.. drop a comment via tag board tu. msg me via frenster. call me. or kalau btol2 nak make sure that I didn’t lie to you, we meet. heheheh!

ok direct to the point yang sebenarnye. ada pembaca blog yang menyangka bahawa saya telah bergaduh dengan seorang sahabat saya yang ikrab, selain daripada cik Elham tu lah, ie Amilia Abdul Aziz. laa hai sampai ke situ ke korang pikir...... dasatnye...... jangan tanye mana saya dapat tau though I found it rather hilarious.. yela panjang sungguh imaginasi korang :D bleh buat satu movie baru gitu heheheh.. takdela saya tak gado pun dgn dia kan Mily kan *HUG* so Milia bukanla orang yang saya maksudkan. though ada gak la citer kitorang2 je kan.. heheheh tapi takde melibatkan gado walaupun satu ayat! but all these things made us closer than ever. kan!

actually dalam post to ada 3 benda yang orang tak tau. Ada 3 perkara yang sangat menyedihkan yang saya dapat tau pada waktu itu.

Pertama sebab ada kengkawan yang tak dapat masuk llb (h) yang menyebabkan saya sedih yang teramat. Rasa incomplete. Sbb you can have as many frens as you can but there are few that matter. And I did went bummed on this issue.

And secondly, ni news berenaan dgn harta bendaku. Ni memang marah tahap tak ingat la.. amboi2 sonang2 jo ekau amik kesempatan atas den!!! Apo ingan den ni bank negaro ko??? Kes yang ni saya blom confront lagi sebab tengah memikirkan jalan yang terbaik utk handle amsalah ni sbb tau2 ada bendasing plak karang…(insert your favorite spooky music here.. woooooooo)

Thirdly, well… ni isu yang mmg saya tak tahu nak citer camana and nak kata camana. Saya tak berani nak cakap betul2 apa yang sebenarnye berlaku kat sini sebab kat cyberspace ni ada certain controlling power yang saya sendiri tak sedar dia ada. And if I tell what that I really think nanti, whoa… itu akan menjadi satu isu yang teramat besar. Segala benda akan terungkit, segala persoalan akan terkawab. Peh dasatnye.. tapi takpe yang tu memang saya harap biarlah saya dengan pihak yang berkenaan je yang bercerita. Sebab saya telahpun memberitahu akan pihak yang berkenaan akan ketidakpuasan hati ini kepadanya secara am. Dan kami sepakan akan sambung cerita lagi di masa akan dating so that tiada dendam antara kita. Tiada duka antara kita. Tiada apa onar lagi yang memisahkan kita.

Saya tak tahu siapa yang sewajarnya dipersalahkan dalam perkara ini, saya sedar saya juga silap membuat perhitungan. Silap membuat percaturan. Silap membuat penilaian. Pendek kata banyak buat silap lah. (Cuma satu je.. ni mmg attention to one of my buddy la.. awak tidak bertanya kepada saya terlebih dahulu, hanya assume under satu premis yang rapuh. Sekarang dah jadi nak buat macam mana ye tak? Kanaknkan??? Tapi takpe takde hal nye kita ni, dua dua pihak tak rugi apa2 kan :p) tapi tindakan pihak di seberang sana juga perlu diambil perhatian. Sebab setelah diselidiki apa yang berlaku, ia telah menambahkan kedukacitaan say terhadap mereka yang berkenaan. Rasa macam nak buang semua kawan. Rasa macam dah tak ada sesiapa lagi yang boleh dipercayai di dunia ni. Memang perasaan betrayal tu ada. Tak dapat dinafikan.

Sehingga saya bertanya soalan ini kepada diri sendiri. “apakah dosaku terhadap mereka? Apakah yang telah aku lakukan kepada mereka? Inikah yang sepatutnya aku terima? Adakah benar nilai diriku ini hanya sekecil kuman?” dan saya mula membuat satu kesimpulan: ya mungkin benar, ada pihak ini yang amat marah kepada saya dalam nilai yang teramat tinggi sehinggakan sekilas nama saya didengar, perasaan jelik mula menghantui dirinya. Tapi tidak mengapa. saya tidak berani hendak meletakkan harga terhadap diri ini, itu satu soalan yang subjektif.

Mungkin ada benarnya. Pada kaca mata mereka, saya sudah tidak ada nilai lagi. Sepertimana saya melihat seorang hamba Allah ini dari kaca mata saya, pada say, beliau ini sudah tidak ada nilainya lagi. Kecuali jika beliau berubah dan mula memikirkan apakah yang sepatutnya beliau pentingkan. Tapi tidak mengapa, beliau tidak ada kaitannya dalam cerita saya untuk hari ini. Tidak mengapa.

Jadi adalah besar harapan saya agar semua pihak dapat memahami apakah gejolak hati ini. Apakah perasaan yang sedang saya hadapi. Apakah masalah yang sedang ditempuhi. Saya amat menghargai sekiranya ada di antara pembaca blog yang bertanya sendiri kepada diri ini. Agar tidak ada cerita – cerita yang tidak sepatutnya anda ketahui dariapda sumber lain. Kejujuran anda amatlah saya hargai. Dan segala sokongan anda banyak membantu diri ini agar bertindak matang dan menyelesaikan segala permasalahan dengan cara yang baik.

Thanks, all of you. :D

goodbye, the yellow brick road

2005-06-28T15:45:00.000+08:00

adiós a toda mi tristeza

adiós a toda la desesperación

adiós a todas las mentiras

adiós a toda la tortura

adiós a mi pasado

soy cansado de ser el segundo mejor

yo soy cansado de ser el lapdog que

soy cansado para ser usado

yo soy cansado para ser manipulado

yo soy cansado de todo el esto

estoy apesadumbrado si mi decisión le lastima

pero apenas no puedo contenerlo

que no puedo vivir más

en esta tela por completo de mentiras

y no puedo prometerle que seremos siempre buenos siempre otra vez

realmente no sé que esto es mi llamada final

no sé si usted puede ganar siempre mi confianza que soy otra vez cansado de la gente,

yo soy cansado de mentiras estúpidas

y el engaño apenas me deja solo.

tan adiós y deseo que le para el mejor

para él nunca enmendarían me deja otra vez ir,

me deja para mí nunca desearía

libremente ver la cara más

no fue significado tan para ser

y espero que nunca lo lamentara

que soy becaouse afligido de usted

y déjeme van lejos déjeme moverse encendido

y vivir una nueva vida para él sería

más significativo que cuando usted está en él

i've been giving myself a thought about my own life one of these days and indeed, i am moving on. so goodbye to all my sorrows, and hello to a new leaf in my life.

as quoted by scarlett o'hara in gone with the wind,

after all, tomorrow is another day

it's a sucky life here. deja vu!

2005-06-25T13:00:00.000+08:00

i remembered teh time when i was 16 and i thought it was one of the worst eyars of my life: i changed school. i have to adapt with this new environment whereby everyone has its own cliques and i'm just this new girl. and i've been labelled as the new girl until my last day of school. i wont say anything bad about my friends sbb tak ada rasanye, hehehe :D tapi i would always remembered this saying till this day, and i still remember who said it to me ( i wont disclose the name, let me keep this to myself)

farah, kat sekolah ni hanya ada 3 cara je yang boleh buat kau diterima oleh diorang. firstly, you must be rich. 2nd, you must be pretty, and thirdly, ko pandai. if you dont have any of the three, then you're a nobody. seriously i tell you this.

and there i was, just a normal schoolgirl who wore braces, tak pandai, didnt excel in all fields, just a normal, average girl. tade apa yang special pun. thank goodness i finally get through my spm with flying colors (according to my standards at that time lah :p) and bleh apply to do something that i actually like and love to do.

so i choose to do law. i remembered my mother was so shocked when she found the letters i hid from the whole family that i got places to do something else. she didnt think that i would get a place in doing law, she was unsure, takut i tak dapat tempat nak blaja. so baik amik je, kalau dapat you blah. i said i'm confident i would get a place and hehehe.. i've been in uitm for 5 years oredi, tak lama sangat dah pun kot hehehehe...

tapi semalam saya rasa deja vu. as in pengalaman yang saya rasa about 7-8 years ago will repeat itself. i got a good news yesterday (tak payahla announce kat sinih.. malas) tapi a bad news at the same time. all of the sudden i feel lonely. sangat lonely. i did say to elham few months back "my gut feeling said that i'm gonna be left alone" and yes, it happen now. maybe not for a while (i'm praying that it only be for a while.. tolonnnnngggglaaaaa!!!!) but still it happens. i'm alone. nobody wants me. i'm with no one. sedih sangat.:((:((:((

so i've been evaluating myself according to the standard set up by my friend back in ssp. i think i'm not pretty, i'm not rich definitely, though i am quite a street smart (and i'm proud of that one). but still... i dont have the x factor or the wow factor kot. ke terlalu ada x or wow factor sampai ditakuti orang :((:(( but still i am sedih la. yelah sapalaa kita ni... i think i sedar diri la.. saya sedar saya tak layak. so mr basir, campaklah saya ke mana pun!

i'm gonna be alone. ALONE until april 2005!!!!!!!! :((:((:((:((

lonely - akon

2005-06-25T12:36:00.000+08:00

Lonely im so lonely,
I have nobody,
To call my owwnnn

Im so lonely, im mr. Lonely
I have nobody,
To call my owwnnn
Im so lonely,

Yo this one here goes out to all my playas out there ya kno got to have one good girl whose always been there like ya
Kno took all the bullshit then one day she cant take it no more and decides to leave

I woke up in the middle of the night and I noticed my girl wasn't by my side,
coulda sworn I was dreamin, for her I was
Feenin, so I hadda take a little ride, back tracking ova these few years, tryna figure out wat I do to make it go bad, cuz
Ever since my girl left me, my whole life came crashin

Im so lonely (so lonely),
Im mr. Lonely (mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girl

Im so lonely (so lonely)
Im mr. Lonely (mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girl

Cant belive I hadda girl like you and I just let you walk right outta my life, after all I put u thru u still stuck
Around and stayed by my side, what really hurt me is I broke ur heart, baby you were a good girl and I had no right, I
Really wanna make things right, cuz without u in my life girl

Im so lonely (so lonely)
Im mr. Lonely (mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody to call my own)
To call my own (to call my own) girl

Im so lonely (so lonely)
Im mr. Lonely (mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girl

Been all about the world ain't neva met a girl that can take the things that you been through
Never thought the day would come where you would get up and run and I would be out chasing u
Cuz aint nowhere in the globe id rather be, aint noone in the globe id rather see
then the girl of my dreams that made me
Be so happy but now so lonely

So lonely (so lonely)
Im mr. Lonely (mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own)

Im so lonely (so lonely)
Im mr. Lonely (mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girrll

Never thought that id be alone, I
didnt hope you'd be gone this long,
I jus want u to call my phone, so stop playing girl and
Come on home (come on home),

baby girl I didn't mean to shout,
I want me and you to work it out, I never wished Id ever
Hurt my baby, and its drivin me crazy cuz...I

m so lonely (so lonely)
Im mr. Lonely (mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own)

Im so lonely (so lonely)
Im mr. Lonely (mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girll

Lonely, so lonely
So lonely, (so lonely)
Mr. Lonely, so lonely
So lonely, so lonely,
(so lonely), Mr. Lonely

surgeries, anyone?

2005-06-24T16:51:00.000+08:00

last nite i watched this one programme kat mtv, nama dia i want a famous face, ada this one girl nak jadi britney spears, and the other one had 3 boob jobs already!!! aritu dah tunuk tapi dia agak censored kalau primetime, so time midnite tu mmg clear la tunjuk gambor.. seram akak!!! looking at all these tubes put inside you in order to have famous face? famous boobs even???

the girl yang dah buat 3 boob jobs tu pun kata sakit and one of her boobs actually exploded and that is why she has to undergo few more boob jobs. dia kata kekadang nak je buang tapi memikirkan nanti kulit dia sag so there the boobs are...

which makes me think for a while tentang all this plastic surgeries thing. i watched "breast men" at HBO where david schwimmer (of Friends and Madagascar fame) berlakon jadi this famous doctor yang jadi gile bab besarkan boob orang sampai ramai orang saman dia sebab they got cancer. takut woo.. ye lah dah elok2 sihat and then you nak buat those boob jobs, dah kena kanser.. sapa suruh cari pasal???

waa do i sound so bias kan? generally, all these plastic surgeries is actually a matter of choice. nak buat ke taknak, itu bergantung kepada yang pemunya diri. nak buat jugak, carilah doktor yang benar2 berkelayakan so that nanti korang tak sakit. takut woo.. me myself is oso scared of this breast cancer thingy!! memang la nak cantik, tapi kalau tak betul.. nanti your body nampak cam balloon (awfully large boobs, skinny bod, awfully fat ass) pun tak padan jugak. be proportionate. and reasonable. because a lot of money is involved and in the end, you yang kena bawak badan tu kan.. tau tak big boobs are heavy to carry? kalau skinny tapi your cup size is like 36F (wow taht's exxagerating, tapi memang unproportionated pun kan) memang you'll have back problem and so forth. so be wise in making your decision. there is always a reason why Allah created our body this way or the other.

as for myself, i don't need it. nak buat apa ye tak? though sometimes i wish i have olive oyl type of body, tapi takpe la, it's how nature has shaped me and who knows if finally i will be skinny and small? woo.. time tu sure best nak shopping baju!!!!! so anyhoo, no plastic surgeries for me. also because i'm afraid of the idea of slashing my body, all those needles and knives inside me.. NOOOOOOOO!!!

thoughh my wisdom teeth (2 of them) kena gak dioperatekan sbb mendatangkan masalah (tumbuh abnormally. youshould look at my x-rays!!)

tata!

2005-06-24T16:43:00.000+08:00

babai my black hair... i'm changing its colour oredi.. now i'm brown-haired! i'm thinking of having highlights done.. mak tanye 'kat skola boleh ke kaler rambut camtuh?" i'm like "buat jelah ek mak"... sick and tired of all these rules! JUST DO IT!!!!!

2005-06-24T16:42:00.000+08:00

my new babies (apart from the new high heels of course :p)

MyStats :p

2005-06-20T10:26:00.000+08:00

i'm not very much into the updating thingy sebab kununnye arini nak dihabiskan dengan mengupdate benda2 kat sinih.. skali tengok kat yahoo movies they gave good reviews pasal batman begins rasa cam nak tengok la plak!!! heheheh... so just a short update la kot?

THINGS I CELEBRATED
as everyone is quite aware of. semalam kan father's day.. cam lawak je kitorang buat tak tau kat our dad.. macam tak reti2 lagik ada father's day.. leh kuar satu hari tu buat tatau saje hehehehe... tapi malamnye tu cam biasa laa kitorang bagi kad and prezen sket.. hehehe.. sorry daddy we all have to lie a bit :p :)):)) tapi ok la tu kan hehehee!!!

happy father's day to your dads too!!

BOOKS I BOUGHT
bought 2 books, namely where rainbows end by cecelia ahern and sushi for beginners by marion keyes.. bengkek sket lar dgn orang cold storage bangsar tuh.. dia letak price tag kat board to books for 9.89 so i pun beli la buku sushi tuh... dah nak bayar my sister nak gi toilet plak.. so mak kata takpe mak bayarkan.. skali rupa2nye 34 inggit lebih.. mengamuk laa mak i sekejap.. ye laa tadi kata 9 bucks only kan.. me oso mad jugak laa.. mana nak tau buku tu harga lain kan! tapi mak pun marah skejap je, alhamdulillah... tapi i still bengang laa dgn orang cold storage tu.. nasib smalam gi dgn parents... kalau i pergi sendiri i memang dah complain dah! misleading advertisements!! and buku tu nye harga tidak dilabel dgn betul!!!! haa ni dah bleh masuk consumer tribunal dah ni tau!!! (my law student thinking head dah datang.. apa guna blaja soga kan.. BTW sape ingat si fahrin ahmad tu dlu classmate soga kita? ala yang tumpahkan air tuuuu!!!)

eh eh merapu laa plak.. anyhoo tak sempat lagi nak baca buku sushi tu sebab saya skarang tgh membaca buku where the rainbows ends.. cambest juga though baru baca stakat si alex tu dah engaged and rosie dah ada anak... the story evolves through messages exchanged between those two, their families, teachers etc. lawak juga. sedih sket juga. bleh tahan la pendek kata. tapi memang pun irish writers memang bagus i have to say that! even better that american writers selalunye.. uk nye chic lits pun best jugak!

takpe nanti laa saye review erk!

FOOD PLACES I WENT
saturday gi cozy house kat GE mall.. bleh tahan juga foodnye at such affordable price la jugak.. i had my penang friend kwayteow. my favorite tu!!! but of course, minus the kerang... i dont eat kerang laa.. sampai kena ejek dgn my sister je slalunye bcuz of my eating habits... evem my mother pun kata saya memilih. nak ikutkan tak juga.. mayeb sbb kekadang bila benda tu dijadikan kuah saya tak makan.. tapi kalau goreng on je!! heheheh!! siap mak kata.. ko dapat suami yang nak makan macam2 nahaslaa....

sunday gi bangsar pulak.. makan kat this one new vietnamese restaurant (note: i rarely have lunch at home. makan kat luar je slalunye.. mak malas nak masak sbb my grandmother (HER mother) sangat cerewet. so masak for dinner only). makanan dia biasa jer.. i prefer thai or chinese food lagik. rasa ok jugak la, tapi sbb kurang pedas i rasa pelik sket la.. heheheh.. great ambience BTW! memang cantik decoration dia.. tapi space dia agak kecik la. my father kata kalau nak beli kedai2 kat lot yang baru ni memang kalau takde million2 jangan mimpi laa.. tak taulaa cane plak dgn rate sewa dia kan? smalam gak mom showed us jalan terasek, the area she used to live kat bangsar tu before all four of us were born (alamak sori.. sabri tak ikut smalam). waa happening gak mak ni erk..

AKADEMI FANTASIA

i was so takut kalau2 mawi buat the same mistake cam haritu.. memang kalau dia buat silap lagi emamng sah2 tak nak minat lagik dah! heheh.. nasib baik laa dia nye persembahan tu menghiburkan.. vokalnye masih perlu diperbaiki lagi.. maybe sebab lagu rancak yang memerlukan lebih banyak pergerakan kan.. heheheh.. congrats mawi!

yazer though kekadang tu ada lari2 sket vokalnye dia memberikan feel yang tersendiri towards lagi tu.. saya dapar rasa kenervousan yazer... but he's really good oso. same goes to amylea. mula2 dlu tak minat tau.. skali tengok konsert ni minat la plak! felix plak yang i rasa agak kureng sket minggu ni.. suaranye pecah sket rasanye kan.. takpe felix.. BUCK UP!!!

my fav in af (vocal+personality+showmanship) mawi, yazer, amylea, felix, and amy.

should be worth mentioning is the nice boy kefli yang nyanyi lagu keindahan pantai tu.. best jugak!

gotta leave now. see ya!!!

me and my surroundings

2005-06-16T19:43:00.000+08:00

lately i am quite occupied with many things in my life, sampai takde masa sangat nak memblogkan diri.. ada few messages dalam frenster yang tak berjawab lagik sbb ada benda2 yang hendak diselesaikan.. ntahla.. my life bukannye best sangat pun.. biasa jer ehehehe... sangat boring jugak sebenarnye. nak amik gambar bebanyak, saye sedar diri lagik.. i'm not jennifer lopez or angelina jolie.. as in cun meletup tahap tak ingat punye (having said taht, personally i love angie than jlo!) so agak malas jugak nak amik gambar of myself.. bkan takde camera, ada... tapi saya gemuk sangat sampai tak muat gambar!! amik gambarpun kalu ada special occasion saja. having said that, tengok laa kalu ada mood nak buat my posing day i amik laa gambar lagik... but for the time being do enjoy the pics taken during fena's wedding ok!

things around the globe:

michael jackson acquitted. yep that is the decision made by the jury. despite me being a huge fan of his, i do think that he actually did oen of those things. yet, in the current situation, i just think of the other side as a bunch of golddiggers, teying to get a hefty sum of dinero from MJ and co so that they'll be filthy rich as fast as they can. another way of earning quick money i guess?
i just happened to read shireen leandra's blog and i must say that i love her writing style :D best!! should be one of my favorites really soon i guess!
the recent case of supposedly pelajar cemerlang spm yang tak dapat jps scholarship just gave me a jolt on my veins.. bkan apa.. it shows that bebudak sekarang ni makin lama makin pandai! i remembered during my time when scoring 8As is quite an achievement (that was mine, most of my friends dapat 6 aggregate tau)... i don't knwo whether exam sekarang ni makin senag ker or the government is trying to produce even more amounts of first class students (wait, uitm tried to promote that idea yet just look at our school nye facilities.. kami dianaktirikan! tapi ok laa tu.. daripada takde kan.. hehehe).. ok coming back to teh point at issue.. since there are like so many high achievers around the block, so jpa MAYBE have to be more selective in picking who is more deserving to receive their scholarship kan? so takdelaa nak jadi much of an issue bila kita fikir camtu. having said that, kesian jugak kat bebudak tu sebab dah penat2 belajar last2 tak dapat scholar kan? but in the end they got their scholarship anyhoo thanks to jpa. hehehe.. nampak gayanye kita ni kenalaa belajar 300X lebih rajin dari mereka ni... the job market will be flooded with a bunch of whiz kids.. so me the not so bright one kenala compete with other skills that i actually have (or learn anythingt useful!)
the news on a baby girl left alone with her dead mother and sister memang menyayat hati saya. yelah.. the father dah selamat dah ada kat india ke bangla ke maan tah and the mother, due to desakan hidup, terpaksa membunuh diri dan anaknye sebab dah tak ada duit. i think she didnt have the heart to kill her little one kot.. yelaa she's so little lagi kan.. kesian bila dengar citer2 camni.. sebab yelaa.. mak mana tak sayang anak kan? parents kita sanggup buat apa jer utk kita. and alhamdulillah jabatan kebajikan masyarakat dah melakukan yang terbaik untuk baby girl yang diberi nama nurul ain tuh :D
which brings me to the point of menghargai apa yang kita ada sekarang. sebab kadang2 kita tak seadr betapa susahnye hidup ni kekadang. tadik masa kuar dgn mak, ada sorang pakcik ni naik motor and carry all these plastic bottles.. nak antar ke pusat kitar semula agaknya. mak kata "tengok tu, camana susahnye orang nak cari rezeki nak hidup. takde harta lain yang lebih bermakna yang mama boleh bagi kat korang apart from ilmu pengetahuan sebab dengan cara tu lah korang boleh bina hidup korang. so belajar laa betul2". what that she said does make sense. kekadang kita rasa tak pas hati dengan hidup kita sebab we dont have enough money, physically unattractive, tak pandai mana, social skills sucks, tak dapat nak melaram baju2 cantik and bawak keta mewah, living with the high society yadda yadda yadda. tapi, bila fikir balik, bukankah lebih bermakna kalau kita berusaha dengan tangan sendiri? seriously, bila kita dah start bekerja sendiri kita akan kenal erti kehidupan. sedar diri sket kalau tak asik dimanja aje. kan?
alamak sedeh laa plak post tadik tuh.. okok takpe.. anyhoo nak citer pasal AF3 sket. memang laa persembahan si mawi tu mendukacitakan. frust sangat!having said that takleh nak salahkan dia sangat.. diapun bkan dari bandar, tak terdedah dengan benda2 ni suma so payah jugak dia nak adapt dengan new situations. and dia pun terkejut tengok orang minat dia sampai camtuh. apapun saya harap agar si awi dapat membuat persembahan dengan jauh lebih baik lagi so that dia dapat tutup mulut suma2 orang yang criticize dia selama ni yang dia tu dapat undi simpati. GO MAWI!!!!!!!

oklaa sampai sini aje. malam ni nak tengok citer a lot like love and monster in law.. baru jer beli dvd dia tadik yay!!

2005-06-16T11:49:00.000+08:00

heheh.. lepas gi orang kawen lepak kat burger king near fena's house.. and heheh sesi bercerita pun bermula.. tu pun in a rush tau!! sambung lagik dalam kereta heheheh!!!! ok diana hope you are happy with these!!!

2005-06-16T11:47:00.000+08:00

me and diana :D (note: elham and ipah nye gambor tak leh release kat sini sbb sesuatu sebab yang saya kena jaga...)

2005-06-16T11:46:00.000+08:00

fena and her husband, anwaar haaziq. check out the flower girls!! all of them are fena's cousins from her mom's side. note: from our observation, the dj masa that wedding was so liking fena's name!!! heheheh!!! marah plak haaziq nanti :D

2005-06-16T11:43:00.000+08:00

this picture is especially for my beloved fren and former idol (and still do!) puan diana ahmad mustaffa!!!!!! this picture was taken during fena's wedding on june 11th. look how happy fena is!!! i love her to death!!!

2005-06-12T17:59:00.000+08:00

the soloist, pierre. sore dia memang merdu larr.. for a 15 year old boy!

2005-06-12T17:56:00.000+08:00

the poster of LES CHORISTES.

les choristes (2005)

2005-06-12T17:47:00.001+08:00

MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE

I went to see this movie last frieday at gsc mid valley, since ada french movie festival kat sana (which in my opinion should be given more time fram la.. tak sempat nak tengok banyak movie.. ) and all that i can say is that it's a beautiful movie. sedih jugak, happy jugak, lawak jugak and of course the beautiful performance by the teacher, clement mathieu (played by gerard jugnot) and the soloist in the choir group (pierre, played by jean baptiste). wonderful music compostion, the song i posted below is my personal favorite in this movie. sayu sangat lagi2 plak bile tgk budak lelaki tu nyanyi.. cam kita pun dapat rasa yang diorang pun menderita sama.. hehhehe... well that is a typical farah :p

and oh btw, tthis movie was nominated for three oscars at the 77th oscar, including best foreign movie and best original song.

GENERAL STORYLINE OF THE MOVIE

Set in 1948, a professor of music, Clement Mathieu, becomes the supervisor at a boarding school for the rehabilitation for minors. What he discovers disconcerts him--the current situation is repressive. Through the power of song, Clement will try to transform the students.

LYRICS

Vois sur ton chemin

by Les Choristes

Vois sur ton chemin
Gamins oubliés égarés
Donne leur la main
Pour les mener
Vers d'autres lendemains

Sens au coeur de la nuit
L'onde d'espoir
Ardeur de la vie
Sentier de gloire

Bonheurs enfantins
Trop vite oubliés effacés
Une lumière dorée brille sans fin
Tout au bout du chemin

Sens au coeur de la nuit
L'onde d'espoir
Ardeur de la vie
Sentier de la gloire

2005-06-12T17:47:00.000+08:00

the teacher, monsieur gerard is teaching the naughty, mischievous, poor boys how to sing.

2005-06-09T12:17:00.000+08:00

another jim movie, the one i've been wanting to watch for like months and finally did get to watch it! his portrayar of a shy, lovelorn Joel is one of his best yet. who says eh can only play comedy? he and kate did a marvellous job in my opinion. though i think i do have to watch the movie again before giving my review on it. nak understand the story even more! Note: this movie an oscar recently oso for best original screenplay. indeed the story is original. i never seen a movie liek this before. thanks to charlie kaufman btw! (ok ok i write the review later)

could a person BE more underrated?

2005-06-09T12:14:00.001+08:00

the main title is a real question that i'm trying to impose to all of you: do you think that jim carrey is overrated or underrated? probably the hottest funnyman in Tinseltown for a decade oredi, yet there's no Oscars for him yet. probably because they still value him as this funny guy who shouldnt be taken seriously. probably because of the fact that he is canadian (they really have this bias thingy for canadian people, especially people in the Academy of Motion Arts and Science, ie the Oscar peeps). or simply because it wasnt his luck yet?

having said that, Jim Carrey is one of my favorite actors of all time. i just realized that most of my favorite movies has jim carrey in it! indeed i'm a huge fan of his (tapi takdela sampai tahap obsessed!).. and today i just feel like posting all his movies that i like. and oh btw this is note oso: thanks for those who own rights over the pictures.. i have no tright wahtsoever over it and all is used for personal ppurposes only. kang kena saman udner copyright baru padan muka i hehehehe...

i do think many people thinkof jim carrey as a comedian only. a bona fide comedian. yet i beg to differ a bit. i mean, indeed he is funny but he can be serious when he wants to. he plays serious actor good! but the thing is is, it's hard for peopel to accept him as a serious actor with rubber face like that. it really is hard! as for me, i like him both as a comedian and serious actor. just at his protrayal as truman burbank, andy kaufman and joel barish.. i love them! i think i did talked with fadhlin previously on this topic. and i think both of us concur on the same idea :)

having said that, he is still the celebrated comedian of the last bit of the last millennium, and i hope that finally, one day, he gets his long-deserving Oscar.

man, i should be getting a job in the entertainment world!

2005-06-09T12:14:00.000+08:00

as the evil count olaf in lemony snickets: a series of unfortunate events. he and teh cute baby stole the show! Note: this movie won an oscar recently for achievement in makeup. and the winner did thanked him as he went through major changes in the movie.

2005-06-09T12:11:00.000+08:00

jim as Bruce in Bruce Almighty. featured in this photo as well is Morgan Freeman, another class act as well. this is one of his mega-blockbuster movie.

2005-06-09T12:09:00.000+08:00

hehe... i love this movie oso!! i remembered gi tengok kat wayang tau... masa tu bulan pose.. masuk matriks law part two heheehh... (note: i need to correct the fact about him, he did won a golden globe in the truman show. so that makes two).

2005-06-09T12:05:00.000+08:00

another performance by him which garnered him his first and only golden globe. one of his best. title of the movie: man of the moon.

2005-06-09T12:04:00.000+08:00

one of my favorite movie ever. this movie tells us the awful truth about the entertainment world. and you cannot help but pitying him in this movie. and i do think that he is underrated in this movie. go and watch this one!!!

2005-06-09T12:02:00.000+08:00

SMOKIN!!!! i love this movie.. lagi2 time dance sequence lagu Cuban Pete tuh... i liked the song after i saw him singing the song. and this movie locked his rep as a rubber faced actor.

2005-06-09T12:01:00.000+08:00

the movie that made jim carrey a household name: ACE VENTURA! i even watched this movie's sequel at the movies tau when i was a kid!

should i do it?

2005-06-07T20:02:00.000+08:00

today is actually not a very good day for me, apart from eating this delicious mexican bun i bought after depositing my rental money for this month. i don't know, i'm kind of pissed off with someone. sangat marah. tak taula whether it's because of my hormonal state ke apa, tapi memang the bottom line is, i am pissed.

tak tau nak kata apa, tak tau nak buat camana, seriously i am blank. one thing for sure my mercy is zero. some people just take us for granted. i thought at first is that it's ok just go on with the flow, cuma perlu lebih berhati hati kot dengan orang orang yang macamni. tapi kalau dah kena camni agak geramla kan.. sebab seboleh2 kita taknak perceive a person negatively, right? tapi i do have my limits oso tau!!!

having said that, i try my very best not to mengutuk ke buat apa2 yang tak baik kat that person.. sebb who knows maybe dia ada a valid reason to do so kan.. though what that i can say is that the person is so darn irresponsible! sanggup ko buat camni kat diriku? adake patut???

hish, memang geramla. tapi takpe, kita sabar je dlu.. after this, whenever i see that person.. just bear the consequences ye.. paham2 jela what will i do!!

in other words, BE AFRAID. BE VERY, VERY AFRAID!!!!!!

my observations

2005-06-07T18:10:00.000+08:00

on myself

i become much quieter than usual. i don't talk much, i don't do much, apart from sitting at the front of the tv or the darn computer and do nothing! basically i become the official bum of the month! come on, anyone with life more interesting than mine, please!!!
apparently, there are great movies in june. i didn't get to watch eternal sunshine the other day (3 astros in the house and all tuned in for AKADEMI FANTASIA??? two VCRs recording the same show sicne the otehr one is broken.. man someone should tell my parents to watch something else!) and i'm gonna watch it tomorrow (yay!), when a man loves a woman is on also, and tuesdays with morrie and loads more i think on astro!! if there's nothing good, well there's always more dvd for me to choose and watch :p
my obsession with friends grow even more. i watch friends like 3 times daily! 2 times on star world and 1 time on 8tv! i know the end of friends, already has the cds (now i'm working on buying dai nye dvd collection plak.. pirated ones jela tapi.. takde duit la nak beli yang original :p) and still i watch friends alng laughed continuously. in the words of monica, I KNOW!!
i know that it is wrong for me to hate anyone in this world.. yet i don't know whether it is me or memang that persons deserved to be hated. i don't know whether i hate them or i just don't like them, or i'm just mad at them i really don't know!!!
went to kak saba's wedding in ampang ALONE.. kesian gue.. sedey gak laa sbb gi sorang2 but anyhoo everything worked out ok laa :D thanks to kak saba, zuri and family yang sangat baik and hospitable :D seronok lak gi kenduri diorang.. sangat bangge tengok one of my seniors dah kawen! (note: zuri's sister was my senior in ssp).

TV mania

several tv shows caught my attention recently. some already aired and some gonna be soon!!

desperate housewives is gonna be on star world and 8tv!! yay!! tapi kalau kat 8tv sure banyak potong punye...
average joe hawaii: well dah tau dah sapa menang.. tu yang agak tension sket nak tengok citer nih.. sebab i do think that the first runner up tu is a very nice guy! aarrgh as always looks rule for the damn larissa..
miss universe: with controversy surrounding the bookies on who should be crowned miss universe and of course, miss indonesia, artika sari dewi's entry in the pageant, makes me want to watch the show. yelaa nak gak tau apahal laa yang meletup tahap tak ingat nih.. despite i'm against the miss universe nye concept, oh come on, bikini competition to view a woman's beauty? that is simply pure lust!
joey: friends lives on in this show and it gets good ratings in US. cant wait to have a how-you-doin' action!
akademi fantasia: all of us at home resolves to not to vote for anyone yet do supports the contestants though. this is due to the fact that the contestants, once out from the akademi gets all big headed about themselves and simply perasan bagus laa.. with controversial issues surrounding mawi and marsha one of these days, AF is a must watch!
malaysian idol: the auditions were hilarious, yet i wondered where are the good ones? i read on the newsies saying that the talents coming in this year is mucho bueno than the previous year. oh come on, wherefore art thou? and to jaclyn victor, don't brag please... once the new idol is in, if you don't take good care of your own attitude, you're soon gonna be kaput. which is a loss since she has a wonderful voice! come on, jac!!
and of course, the new season of QE!!! welcome home Carson and Co!!!!

see all of you really soon!!

it had to be you

2005-06-07T11:07:00.000+08:00

Can men and women be friends or does always sex get in the way?

I watched this movie a couple of times and in my opinion, When Harry Met Sally is a groundbreaking story which inspired other moviemakers to create these types of movies. Recent ones namely Hum Tum (India) and A Lot Like Love (USA). It was shown yesterday at Star Movies and as always, you can always find me watching it (I’m a sucker for romantic comedies, really!).

Basic plot:

Harry and Sally meet when she gives him a ride to New York after they both graduate from the University of Chicago. The film jumps through their lives as they both search for love, but fail, bumping into each other time and time again. Finally a close friendship blooms between them, and they both like having a friend of the opposite sex. But then they are confronted with the problem: "Can a man and a woman be friends, without sex getting in the way?"

It takes 13 years for these two best friends to finally realize that they actually do love each other and further, proved Harry’s point that men and women cannot be friends. The story which spans around 13 years, beginning on their college graduation and a long trip to New York, Harry and Sally get to know each other and eventually become friends, despite their differences.

Actors:

There is absolute chemistry between Crystal and Ryan. That is one thing that I can really affirm. Despite that Crystal is not that handsome heehhehehehe... both are cute on-screen hence reaffirm their position as one of the funniest actors circa late 80s and 90s.

My personal fave scenes apart from these two: the transitional parts whereby old couples told us how they actually met and finally be together. So sweet yet not so cheesy!

Trivia: Carrie Fisher, infamous for playing Princess Leia in Star Wars trilogy, plays a supporting role in this movie, as Marie, the women sally thought would be great for Harry yet she ended up with Harry’s writer friend instead.

Man, I am crap at commenting this movie so I think it’s better if I tell you what I do think about it based on the quotes!
Quotes:

Harry Burns: Repeat after me. Pepper.

Sally Albright: Pepper.

Harry Burns: Pepper.

Sally Albright: Pepper.

Harry Burns: Waiter, there is too much pepper on my paprikash.

Sally Albright: Waiter, there is too much pepper on my paprikash.

Harry Burns: But I would be proud to partake of your pecan pie.

This scene was absolutely hilarious! This twosome went to the art gallery and they were talking using this one funny dialect ad-libbed by Crystal. So funny!!!!

Sally Albright: I'd like the chef salad please with oil and vinegar on the side, and the apple pie a la mode.

Waitress: Chef and apple a la mode.

Sally Albright: But I'd like the pie heated, and I don't want the ice cream on top. I want it on the side, and I'd like strawberry instead of vanilla if you have it. If not, then no ice cream, just whipped cream, but only if it's real. If it's out of the can, then nothing.

Waitress: Not even the pie?

Sally Albright: No, just the pie, but then not heated.

Ahh.. the ever fussy Sally with her quirky way of eating. Everything (and I do mean EVERYTHING) must be on the side, sauce on the side, fries on the side and that, yes indeedy drove Harry mad!! Just look at this one if you do not believe me:

Harry Burns: Ooh, Ingrid Bergman. Now, she's low maintenance.

Sally Albright: Low maintenance?

Harry Burns: There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance.

Sally Albright: And Ingrid Bergman is low maintenance?

Harry Burns: An LM - definitely.

Sally Albright: Which one am I?

Harry Burns: You're the worst kind. You're high maintenance but you think you're low maintenance.

Sally Albright: I don't see that.

Harry Burns: You don't see that? [ demonstrates ] "Waiter, I'll begin with a house salad, but I don't want the regular dressing. I'll have the Balsamic vinegar and oil, but on the side. And then the Salmon with the mustard sauce, but I want the mustard sauce, on the side." "On the side" is a very big thing for you.

Sally Albright: Well, I just want it the way I want it.

Harry Burns: I know. High maintenance.

See? Havent’ I told you?

Harry Burns: Right now everything is great, everyone is happy, everyone is in

love and that is wonderful. But you gotta know that sooner or later you're gonna be screaming at each other about who's gonna get this dish. This eight dollar dish will cost you a thousand dollars in phone calls to the legal firm of That's Mine, This Is Yours.

Marie: Harry.

Harry Burns: Please, Jess, Marie. Do me a favor, for your own good, put your name in your books right now before they get mixed up and you won't know whose is whose. 'Cause someday, believe it or not, you'll go 15 rounds over who's gonna get this coffee table. This stupid, wagon wheel, Roy Rogers, garage sale COFFEE TABLE.

Jess: I thought you liked it?

Harry Burns: I was being nice.

Harry, who were so upset after seeing his ex wife with another man, the one she cheated on him to. I can really feel Crystal’s energy in this scene, where he was simply upset at the time.

Harry Burns: You realize of course that we could never be friends.

Sally Albright: Why not?

Harry Burns: What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way.

Sally Albright: That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.

Harry Burns: No you don't.

Sally Albright: Yes I do.

Harry Burns: No you don't.

Sally Albright: Yes I do.

Harry Burns: You only think you do.

Sally Albright: You say I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?

Harry Burns: No, what I'm saying is they all WANT to have sex with you.

Sally Albright: They do not!

Harry Burns: Do too.

Sally Albright: They do not.

Harry Burns: Do too.

Sally Albright: How do you know?

Harry Burns: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.

Sally Albright: So, you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?

Harry Burns: No. You pretty much want to nail 'em too.

Sally Albright: What if THEY don't want to have sex with YOU?

Harry Burns: Doesn't matter because the sex thing is already out there so the friendship is ultimately doomed and that is the end of the story.

Sally Albright: Well, I guess we're not going to be friends then.

Harry Burns: I guess not.

Sally Albright: That's too bad. You were the only person I knew in New York.

Ahaa… this is the scene which brings us to the very premise of the movie: man and women cannot be friends. And who is the better person to explain this one rather than myself? I was friends with this one guy I known for years and he did say to me that man and women cannot be friends. I said yes they can! And haha guess what, I ended up liking him anyway. It was like the stupidest thing I have ever done in my life, because I ruined my friendship with him. Really it was. And I hate it when he was right!

But anyhoo eventually both of us are friends until now, and even though sometimes I do question myself about his motive of friendship yadda yadda yadda (I still do have issues on trust with people, him also)… I just kept on saying to myself: I just want him to be happy. So I just drop everything. Let it be. And I just want a friend, that is all. Even if that means I have to scold him in order to tell him the truth of things, disagreeing with his points, or feeling like strangling him when he becomes his annoying self. Because that annoying self is his real trait, and not the nicely coated with sugary stuff. He’s a friend of mine and he will always be one. (weh, cepat laa sket ada gelpren.. or married even, I cant wait to see your kids!!!! Kihkihkih!!!) so I guess in the end man and women can be friends, or at least in my story. Right?

Harry Burns: What are you saying, that they fake orgasm?

Sally Albright: It's possible.

Harry Burns: Get outta here!

Sally Albright: Why? Most women at one time or another have faked it.

Harry Burns: Well, they haven't faked it with me.

Sally Albright: How do you know?

Harry Burns: Because I know.

Sally Albright: Oh. Right. That's right. I forgot. Youre a man.

Harry Burns: What was that supposed to mean?

Sally Albright: Nothing. It's just that all men are sure it never happened to them and all women at one time or other have done it so you do the math.

Harry Burns: You don't think that I could tell the difference?

Sally Albright: No.

Harry Burns: Get outta here.

Sally Albright: [ tilts head back, begins to moan ] Ooo...Oh...Ooo...

Harry Burns: Are you okay?

Sally Albright: Oh...Oh God...Ooo Oh God...Oh...Oh...Oh...Oh God...Oh yeah right there Oh! Oh...Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes...Oh...Oh...Yes Yes Yes....Oh...Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes Yes...Oh...Oh... Oh... Oh God Oh... Oh... Huh...[ Sally finishes, looks at Harry and smiles. Harry looks back, looking a little uneasy ][ cut to Woman seated at next table ]

Woman: I'll have what she's having.

Ahh.. the fake orgasm scene that eventually made Meg Ryan famous. This is one of the highlights and the most-talked-about scene in a movie. Absolutely funny and out of this world!

Harry Burns: The fact that you're not answering leads me to believe that (a) You're not home, (b) You're home but you don't want to talk to me, or (c) You're home, desperately want to talk to me, but you're trapped under something heavy. If it's either (a) or (c), please give me a call.

The scene above took place during holiday season… weeks after they slept together, upon Sally finding out that her ex, Joe is going to marry someone else the next day. Man.. sleeping with your best friend of the opposite sex? Man, that’s sad.

Harry Burns: I've been doing a lot of thinking. And the thing is.. I love you.

Sally Albright: What?

Harry Burns: I love you.

Sally Albright: How do you expect me to respond to this?

Harry Burns: How about you love me too?

Sally Albright: How about I'm leaving.

Harry Burns: Doesn't what I said mean anything to you?

Sally Albright: I'm sorry, Harry. I know it's New Years Eve, I know you're feeling lonely. But you just can't show up here, tell me you love me and expect that to make everything alright. It doesn't work this way.

Harry Burns: Well how does it work?

Sally Albright: I don't know but not this way.

Harry Burns: Well how about this way. I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle in your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.

Sally Albright: You see? That is just like you, Harry. You say things like that, and you make it impossible for me to hate you! And I hate you Harry.. I really hate you. I hate you.

This ending prove the point of the whole story, and yes, of course, the writers of the book “He’s Just Not That Into You”. And the whole theory of men and women. I simply love the ending, despite still believing that you can still remain friends (normal acquaintances) with the opposite sex. Why do I love the ending? Oh come on, if a man told me what he liked about me the way Harry did, I would buy the story anyhoo. At least for a while! Hehehe…

Having said that, I do think that these types of ending only exists in movies. Truly!

2005-06-07T10:24:00.000+08:00

one man. one woman. friends? enemies? who can tell that?

2005-06-07T10:23:00.000+08:00

a very happy ending indeed

movie review of the day: seniman bujang lapok (1961)

2005-06-06T15:03:00.000+08:00

heheheheyyy hang jebat! lebih baik kau turun! kalau kau tak nak turun, kau tunggu sampai aku datang! bukannye engkau tak tau yang aku dah lama tunggu kat sini jebat. dan bukan kau tak tau yang aku sudah nak terbuang air besar. inipun aku rasa macam nak terkucil sikit tapi kutahan jebat. ini sudah masuk 7 kali jebat!!! CUT CUT!!!!
(s. shamsuddin, on his screen test)

kau jangan nak mencoba mejjadi tuan director. walau rupamu tidak kukenal, TATAPI LOBANG HIDUNGMU TATAP MENJADI POJAAN HATIKUUU!!!
(aziz sattar on his screen test)

oh adindaku yang cantik rupawan, masih kakanda terbayang, semasa kita bercengkerama, di bawah sinaran LAMPU MINYAK TANAH!!!!!
(p ramlee, on his screen test)

anybody watched this movie yesterday at TV2? i was one of those ppl who actually do watch, being a humongous p ramlee i am for more than 20 years (one of my first memory was that whn i was like 2 years old or something, i watched p ramlee's movie entitled labu labi), who couldnt miss this one?

this is one of those movies that you will watch again, and again, and again despite you already had the cds and watched it on reruns till you can remember every single dialogue and even the cast's costumes! (told you i'm obsessed). and i was surfing kat imdb.com and i just realised that the imdb users rated this movie highly! that's a huge accomplishment!

for those who are living on planet mars for the past century, seniman bujang lapok is the fourth installment in the bujang lapok series. the previous ones were: bujang lapok, pendekar bujang lapok, and ali baba bujang lapok. the storyline is quite simple, about Ramlee, Ajis and Sudin, the three good-for-nothing old bachelors who is trying their luck at making it big as an actor at Malay Film Productions (supposedly the largest movie studio at that time). alongside their bittersweet journey as new stars, there are sub plots as well.. the most notable one is p ramlee's love story with cik salmah (played by saloma).

pregnant with good moral values, hidden mesages and numerous number of jokes, this movie is easily the best out of the bujang lapok series, comedy-wise :D (though pendekar bujang lapok is the most critically acclaimed). the actors acting as if that is their real life, ad-libs and spontaneous acting is the key of this movie's success. the trio's acting as an ensemble couldn't be better. senang cakap, citer ni memang giler best lah. and who could forget p ramlee and saloma's song, "gelora" which inspired several directors to place into their movies as well (most notably in Erma fatima's drama "pengantin popular"), and yes indeedy, the trio's song menceceh bujang lapok :D

my favorite scene is definitely the casting call from hell.. ie the hilarious screen test! memang giler lawak lah!! sanggup tengok berulang kali and still laughing my head off!! the trio, ahmad nisfu (with his trademark lubang hidung) and kemat hassan as the manager easily make my day big time!

all in all, this movie is a gem which should be treasured by all. sometimes people do say that p ramlee is overrated by our society, since there are others who are as talented as eh is yet he gets the most spot in the limelight, but they cannot help but to agree with his achievements, he deserves to be viewed as the legendary figure in our society. no one, i mean NO ONE would ever matched his record. though i do secretly hope that one day, there will be more malays who are as creative and innovative as he is.

Al - fatihah.....

2005-06-06T14:53:00.000+08:00

p ramlee, aziz zattar, ahmad nisfu and kemat hassan on the set of the movie (thanks to yahoo.com for providing this picture).

2005-06-06T14:48:00.000+08:00

one of my favorite movie ever. this is the picture of the movie's original poster.

your lips may lie, but not the rest

2005-06-04T13:25:00.000+08:00

hehehe... cam takut jer baca title tuh :p takde laa.. i havent been really writing one of these days sebab agak membzkan diri laa dengan menengok tv and mengemas bilik.. bak kata yam, farah ske menyepah dan mengemaskan balik apa yang disepahkan.. saja jer ubah bilik tu.. bosan meh.. and it gets dusty oso... tupun banyak tak settle lagi.. knowing me, my lazy strike is always on, and my procrastination has long became a living legend. it should be credited alongside my name next time :p

i have several things in mind to be written, not now, maybe later. sebab i need to clean up my room, read books and watch movies for that matter.. anyhoo..

things which amuses me:

a) tuesdays with morrie is gonna be on tv really soon.. i wont miss that one! i missed the 5 people you meet in heaven, and i cant make myself miss this baby too!!
b) last night i watched the pianist in star world.. yeah i know it's about wladyslaw szpilman (he's a great polish pianist) story of survival during wwII, i even has his book, and read it, but upon seeing adriend brody on screen playing szpilman, i can feel those pain and suffering even more. some might bite me and say "farah, are you nuts? this is the jew we're talking about! are you out of your mind?", well.. i know there are conflicts in the middle east and all.. but all that i can say is go read the book and then you make the conclusion. szpilman's neutral statements on everything, good jew, bad jew, the fact that he was rescued by a german soldier despite the fact that he's a jew gives me some faith on the fact that peace can actually be obtained and retained. having said that, no two persons think alike, and ta-da, there's war! (i'll write more soon)
c) tonight is the first AF concert.. i know.. and mom and the rest of the family is gonna watch it.. but i'm more looking forward to watch eternal sunshine of a spotless mind... tengok laa if takde orang occupies the other astro, i will watch it.. (please, please mother let me watch!! come on!!!!!!)

going to zuri's house after this, see ya!

houston, we have a problem

2005-06-02T12:15:00.000+08:00

i don't know what is wrong with me. i have been either sleeping or at the front of the tv nowadays. my mother, particularly was worried about my conditions since i din't go anywhere and i MEAN ANYWHERE, and sleep like all the time! i don't know! what is wrong with me?

one thing that i do know is that whenever i have a problem, i will sleep, and sleep, and sleep even more. but the thing is, me myself don't know what is my problem! oh my goodness.. what is wrong with me?

maybe my mother is right. i am sick. but how can i say i am sick when physically i thin i'm fine apart from those horrible excessive fats?

maybe i still can't accept the fact that i'm already old. i don't know!

what is your personality?

2005-06-01T12:35:00.000+08:00

Your #1 Match: INFP

The Idealist

You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world.
Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships.
It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close.
But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop.

You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.

Your #2 Match: ENFP

The Inspirer

You love being around people, and you are deeply committed to your friends.
You are also unconventional, irreverant, and unimpressed by authority and rules.
Incredibly perceptive, you can usually sense if someone has hidden motives.
You use lots of colorful language and expressions. You're qutie the storyteller!

You would make an excellent entrepreneur, politician, or journalist.

Your #3 Match: ISFP

The Artist

You are a gifted artist or musician (though your talents may be dormant right now).
You enjoy spending your free time in nature, and you are good with animals and children.
Simply put, you enjoy bueaty in all its forms and live for the simple pleasures in life.
Gentle, sensitive, and compassionate - you are good at recognizing people's unspoken needs.

You would make a good veterinarian, pediatrician, or composer.

Your #4 Match: ESFP

The Performer

You are a natural performer and happiest when you're entertaining others.
A great friend, you are generous, fun-loving and optimistic.
You love to laugh - and you like almost all people equally.
You accept life as it is, and you do your best to make each day fantastic.

You would make a good actor, designer, or counselor.

Your #5 Match: INTP

The Thinker

You are analytical and logical - and on a quest to learn everything you can.
Smart and complex, you always love a new intellectual challenge.
Your biggest pet peeve is people who slow you down with trivial chit chat.
A quiet maverick, you tend to ignore rules and authority whenever you feel like it.

You would make an excellent mathematician, programmer, or professor.

What's Your Personality Type?

keys to my heart

2005-06-01T12:28:00.000+08:00

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to obedience and warmth.

In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.

You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is traditional. Without saying anything, both of you communicate with your hearts.

Your risk of cheating is low. Even if you're tempted, you'd try hard not to do it.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

2005-05-31T13:09:00.000+08:00

at least we're here together!

2005-05-31T13:07:00.000+08:00

alex the sushi-eating lion

2005-05-31T13:05:00.000+08:00

marty the free-spirited zebra

2005-05-31T13:03:00.000+08:00

melman, the hypochondric giraffe. so funny!

2005-05-31T13:00:00.000+08:00

gloria the cool mama hippo

2005-05-31T12:56:00.000+08:00

what an interesting movie. too bad i cant find any posters that features salahuddin or king baldwin tho :(

2005-05-31T12:54:00.000+08:00

my collection of readable things :p

2005-05-31T11:47:00.000+08:00

yet another take of myself

2005-05-31T11:46:00.000+08:00

me turning 23

the old maid does what she does best: speak up!

2005-05-30T19:24:00.000+08:00

on a very hot sunday morning in Kuala Lumpur, 23 years back, one woman struggled to her last breath, delivering a baby, a premature one with a curved forehead, ber first born. little did she know that the smallest newborn she had ever delivered has turned up to be one hell of a giant :p hehehe..

i just can't believe that i actually turned 23 today. time has passed by so fast i can barely say OOOOO :p beginning from the first message i got before midnight from lily to the last one (at least when i read it) from paan, all wind up at one point: i'm growing older.

i did spent a while looking at myself at the mirror, like i always do whenever the day is my birthday. looking at how different i get as days pass by. and indeed i have changed. i can't really say i changed into a better or worse person, despite my acid tongue, i'm crap at all this masuk bakul angkat sendiri thing. really.

last night i talked to one of my friends about ways people celebrating things. be it in a brutal, radical way or the jolly, too-festive like kind of thing. having said that, the whole thing is confidential and i don't think that this is the place for me to talk about it. it has a confidential mark stamped on it. but it does brings us to a poinbt of celebrating things.

i have to say, i love organising things for people. i would love others to have their own parties. but for myself, actually i'm a bit of an anti-establishment. for myself, why should i have a whoopee party when half of teh guests are people that i don't really know? when it is organised so that you feel good about yourself? what is teh objective of having a party anyhoo? and how should i celebrate the day i'm born then?

i don't really care. as long as i'm still alive is good enough. to have my family is a blessing. for them not to resent me is even better. so long as i'm still capable of bringing joy and happiness into the lives of people that i actually care about, i think i have achieved one of the purpose for me being alive.

so today, i decide to not have any hoopla going on, just appreciate myself and people around me, especially those who actually do matter. the best gift that i have today is that when i come home, i see the faces of my younger siblings whom i do adore (despite our silly riots and fights :p hehehe) and to still be able to thank my parents for giving me this life that i never thought i would have, for me to lead a better life than what that they actually had. for paving me the ways for me to stand by my own feet, for me to become who i am today. to have my true friends to remember and accept me for who i really am, and the question "what would you want to be remembered for" for me has just become more of a cliche, a less meaningful question. thanking them for allowing me to grow up with them, to share my ups and dows in life with them. for always be with each other. thanking Allah the Almighty for giving me this opportunity in life, as i am yet just another little creation of His.

for all that, i am totally blessed :)

p/s: despite this somber mood, i am still bengang sebab tak dapat cari dvd or vcd citer eternal sunshine tu.. mid valley pun takde? citer tu actually kena ban ker kat mesia ni erk? hmm... tahla :p

you're ain't heavy, you're my brother

2005-05-29T23:06:00.000+08:00

within few hours time, i'm gonna be 23 years old! i cannot believe that! but i don't want to talk about it right now, better talk about something else... heheheh!

last tuesday was my brother's birthday. sabri nama dia. he turned 20 oredi. he's the only brother that i have, ye laa sorang jelaa lelaki kat rumah tu pun kan.. but sabri does not look a bit like me la, dia sangat hensem (ye nad aku tau...) and sangat kurus... slim the river gitu hahahah.. plus the ever famous jerawats (which celalu menjadi mangsa topik perbualan me and my other sister adik, and sometimes, mak joined also :p).. banyak kawan pompuan sabri nih... tapi tak tau la plak sapa gelpren dia.. hehehe

ok laaa enough of promoting my yonger brother, basically kitorang takde laa celebrate apa pun.. cuma adik and i buat this gigantic birthday card for him and then everyone at home, including baby surayya sign card tu... our dad gave him this soooo coooolll handphone from samsung (semat siot... ala hp yang skarang dok kuar tv tuuu) and me and mom got him a birthday cake... and yes you can easily guess surayya would ask for a cake herself.. so sampai 2 cake laa kitorang kena makan malam tu.. takde kuar mana2 pun.. makan kat rumah saje...

tapi yang bestnye sebab tengok muka sabri bace besday card yang handmade tu laa... syahdu plak.. cam nak nangis pun ada kot muka dia heheheh... siap tepon member lagik tu baca apa yang kitorang tulis pasal dia heheheheh!!!!!!

to sabri, we all went through a lot, especially when our biological father left us. you're still a toddler then and i was just about a bit older as surayya. though we always fight like all the time, kena marah and memarah, you wore my baju (yikes!) and i took your things also (saper suruh tinggal merata hahahah).. being bullied when i was a kid, kakak tolak jatuh tangga and you pulled my teeth sampai patah and berdarah (syahdu woo), the numerous sabrina and veet jokes (heheheh!!!), we all do love you. in our special, brutal way. you're ain't heavy, you're my brother.

compliano e felis!

cards?

2005-05-28T17:35:00.000+08:00

Valentine's Day is a holiday invented by greeting card companies to make people feel like crap.

joel (jim carrey, eternal sunshine of a spotless mind)

i was overly excited upon finding out that eternal sunshine is gonna be on tv very2 soon, since i got fed up of cari the dvd of this movie (i've been to all shops near my house and petaling street and shah alam but still tak ada!!!) and haha it's gonna be on tv! i dont wanna be spoiled regarding the ending though. nanti tak thrill la :p

so i was searching for this movie kat internet just now and i found like a list of interesting quotes regarding this movie and hehehe.... this one stands out.. tengah baca lagi sebenarnya but oh well..

this one reminds me on how much i despise valentine's day. i just dont get it. great marketing strategy and voila, it's celebrated all over the world! havent they know the history behind it? probably sebab i'm single kot so i'm leaning towards not celebrating it hehehe...

but anyhoo... it reminds me of my own birthday. kekadang ada public hols gak tu sbb dekat2 dgnhari gawai kan heheheh... a birthday is a birthday, and i love getting great things on my birthday, but i'm terrified upon thinking about my age!!! so takut of being old!! i might sound shallow, but what can i say, i'm just paranoid of getting old!

love celebrating it, just dont remind me how old i am :p

p/s: a dvd of eternal sunshine of a spotless mind could be a good birthday present for me this year :D

amigos para siempre

2005-05-28T14:10:00.000+08:00

Amigos para siempre

Means youll always be my friend

Amics per sempre

Means a love that cannot end

Friends for life

Not just a summer or a spring

Amigos para siempre

kadang - kadang kita tak sedar betapa bestnye hidup ni. kekadang kita biarkan jer masa tu berlalu tanpa kita sedar. kadang2 kita buat2 lupa jerr dengan benda di persekitaran kita?

khabie - khabie. cam title citer hindustan rishi kapoor and amitabh bachan plak (told you i'm a sucker of hindi movies.. lagi2 kalau shahrukh khan berlakon.. whcih explains the reason why i am so gonna watch the cd of veer zaara today and oh btw i would name my kid zaara or azzahra if i got a girl!) actually iter ni bkan pasal hindi movies ker apa ker.. though i would love to talk about that, this is a srory of me and my childhood frens. kenangan masa skola rendah.

bertahun - tahuns saya tak jumpe diorang. last time saya jumpe mereka masa reunion kat mid valley kot. i was just about 18 years old agaknye, so takde la terasa cam mereunionkan diri kan.. and few years after that i missed a whole lot of reunions.. mengelak pun ada sebenarnye.. ada satu reunion kat klcc tu.. i was free actually.. tapi tak pegi jugak.. i told them i got athing to do.. actually takde.. bukan tak nak jumpe diorang, tapi ada orang - orang yang saya tak mahu jumpe lagi till the day i died and that's why i didn't go. bukan sebab korang. (last2 last smalam terjumpa jugak.. ugh.. tapi buat la my trademark wakil rakyat look.. being me :p and i am so banning myself from seeing that person ever again in my life. you've done bad to too many people and i can never forgive you). yang reunion kat hotel tu plak tak pegi sebab gi egypt last year (the trip memang giler babas best! and we become real friends after the trip also!)..

until last two weeks when rosa, my old school fren told me that one of our frens, hasanuddin is getting married. i decided to go fto the wedding sicne i have noting to do on that day and of course, i havent seen them for so long! dekat 5 tahun ada kot rasanye! apart from hawa and yen yang datang kat my house like two years ago, and amoi which i still do contact occasionally, i basically have no idea on what are they doing one of these days.

anyhoo sampai gak laa aku berjumpa dgn diorang sume... 5 orang in my green wira: me, yen, nadia, rosa and shikin :D the next day was shikin's birthday (i can still remember that until this day!) dekat sejam lebih gak laa kitorang carik umah pengantin tu.. nadia... jauhnye jalan ko tunjuk ni... kalau laa aku tau :p anyhoo sampai laa kitorang ke rumah kenduri tu....

jumpe plak si amoi, lutfi and friadie kat sana.. memang meletup laa kitorang suma... camacam citer kuar.. sampai terlupa skejap kitorang ni kat kenduri kawen hehehe.. only on that day baru i found out that din has actually worked at mcdonalds the mall and he is the manager of that outlet! how proud i was to find that out! sebab mcd the mall was my place to hangout masa skola dlu.. yela.. my school is only like less tahn 10 minutes walk from there.. though kuar pun time weekends je kan hehehe :p wife dia budak uia amik law... kawen law student rupanye.. alhamdulillah.. sama cantik sama padan :D i'm gonna post their pictures soon sebab my hp battery dah awfully low sbb chatting dgn my fren on the phone smalam.. my battery also got very low hahahah! seriously, those two made a good couple :D

then kitorang suma gi jaya jusco wangsa maju la plak borak2 lagik.. sedar tak sedar dekat kol 6 lebih gak laa kitorang kat sana.. ingat balik suma kenangan silam.. and tried to catch up n everything sebab i have missed so many things in their lives.. anyhoo here it goes:

rosa makin matang dalam usia yang sangat muda. seronok sangat dengar citer life dia after a few eyars. soon to be a teacher :D tak sangka kan! she become so tough after so many challenges coming into her life. rasa cam nak jerr dengar citer dia lagik. very inspiring. lagi plak berkaitan dengan kita orang perempuan ni. ye la... never let a guy pijak our kepala okay!
lutfi is still his same kepochi and goofy self :D very funny also! macam2 lawak dia arituh sampai tak kering gusi kitorang dibuatnye! a fellow uitm student like me too.. so dia laa penyebar segala new stori aku kat uitm tu... sampai cikgu nasir pun tanye nak jumpe aku jugek hehehe... saye pun nak jumpe cikgu jugak!! dengar citer anak dah ramai erk? heheheh!!!
yen or lagi satu nama manja dia, faiz (nama dia nor faizren) is gonna be a doctor really soon.. the only one in our class yang amik medicine. i'm teh only one yang amik law. yep we are teh odd ones heheh.. she is still the same old yen to me.. heheh.. kitorang penah terlost contact tapi we worked it out. she lives in malacca and is recovering from the you-know what.. takpe tu laa aritu aku nak recommend law students tak nak.. heheheh.. takde laa.. she's one of my closest frens back in school.. both tau, skola rendah and high school :D
friadie pun still the same ol gak.. dok cari jodoh jerr.. la ni nak orang kelantan jugak.. kinda obsessed jugak la dgn ciri ciri wanita idamannye tu.. takut kekadang aku mendengornye.. dia ni banyak diam je.. tapi sekali dapat peluang buka mulut, tergelak gak kitorang!
nadia.. bakal psychologist... kawan saye dari skola darjah satu! tapi kiter betol2 baik skola menengah rasanye.. time tu btol2 jadik close frens :D aku, nadia, yen and amoi ada geng sendiri time tu hehehe.. hehehe... siapa sangka last2 dia bercinta dgn classmate sendiri.. ie ahmad khairi tu.. kawan kitorang gak tu masa skola rendah.. a very hensem navy oredi. bertuah nadia heheheh.. masa kecik2 tak de plak gosip nak bercinta.. bila dah besar ni alih2 berkenan lak heheheh... tu la orang kata kekadang jodoh ni tak payah cari.. bair je dia datang kat kita... tau2 je dah sampai hehehe... cepat2 la korang ni kawen.. tak sabar aku nak tengok!!!
shikin! another geminian like me who loves to talk a lot. and i mean A LOT!! giler baek dgn dia ni masa skola rendah.. ingat lagi start kawan dgn dia masa standard 5 dengan shafina afzan (apa erk jadik kat dia lama tak jumpa) skarang baru jer grad dalam kejuruteraan aerospace upm... alhamdulillah.. nanti buat kapal terbang jangan lupa gtau kitorang!!! i really miss talking to her. camacam citer boleh kuar!
and who can forget miss khuzaimah!!!! (we amoi, aku ada emmber nama dekat nak sama dgn kau tau.. mukapun lebih kurang, tapi dia lelaki laa.. heheheh! aku kalau nampak dia musti aku teringat kat kau hehehe!!)atau nama glemernye masa skola rendah, kucing! and amoi of course... and sampai skola menengah and masuk uitm pun orang panggil dia amoi jugak! kitorang still baik sampai skarang... nanti end of this year kita konvo sesama.. giler suka! kitorang panggil dia amoi sebab muka dia mmg cam cina. orang pontian cam shikin jugak heheh... dia nye slang johor memang ada lagik laa.. heheheh.. amoi ni mesra alam dengan kawasan persekitaran.. baek sangat dengan suma orang :D everybody loves her including me! and dia pun dah makin chunn skarang!! wow!!

basically tu je la pun yang dapat aku berborak... sbb kitorang sampai lambat kenduri tu so tak dapat nak catch up lagik dgn suma orang!!! tapi ingat balik kenangan masa skola memang best hehehe... trying to list down some of the things yang kitorang flashback aritu:

pergi rombongan skola... we just realized that masa tu banyak giler tempat yang kitorang pergi.. and bila dah besar panjang ni dah tak pergi dah tempat2 tu suma!! antaranye planetarium negara, pusat islam, taman rama - rama, MELAKA (THE BEST SCHOOL TRIP EVER!!!!), zoo negara, taman bukit cahaya seri alam, dinosaurs alive, angkasapuri rtm (shikin you better ingat this one hehehe!!) and banyak lagi la!!
kelas muzik dengan cikgu janet seevaratnam.. an old music teacher yang giler seksi.. bebudak lelaki kalau kelas ida nak duduk depan jerr.. those short skirts were so alluring kot hehehe!! ingat lagik aku slalu kena marah sbb lupa bawak recorder.. pastu kitorang suma slalu kena marah sbb masuk kelas dia lambat.. ye laa time tu muzik lepas pendidikan jasmani mana laa tak rushing!!
kenangan nyanyi koir... dia suruh bukak mulut besor2 keluarkan suara kitorang.. masa tu boleh laa mengsopranokan diri.. masuk skola menengah.. lagi plak masuk ssp lepas tu.. memang sumbang terus suaraku!!! terus tak nak nyanyi sampai bebila!! so terkejut nampak dia kat ssp lak jadi choir coach... terkenang lagi aku... apa jadi kat dia erk..
cikgu ismail yang jadik penyelia petang masa skola darjah lima.. dia lantik suma orang dalam kelas kitorang jadi prefect! kalau balik rumah nye time, kitorang suma bleh kuar 5 minit lebih awal sbb jaga padang skola (skarang tgk2 padang tu kecik je skarang kan?) tapi kitorang kekadang main2 jugak.. beli makanan kat makcik depan gate tu, main kejar - kejar la apa la... kelakar!!
pastu ajar kitorang nyanyi macam2 lagu dalam kelas tu! ingat lagik lagu buih sabun tu.. kitorang yang tak pegi camping masa tu (ramai gi sungai congkak.. nenek saya tak kasik pergi.. mak pun tak kasi jugak.. uwaa... tu yang sampai skarang asal masuk hutan jer tak nak!!) kena basuh kelas.. hehhehe!!! siap nyanyi lagu tu lagik heheh!! pastu kalau time congak sapa dapat betul sume dapat duit cikgu ismail belanja.. bestnye!!!
diorang suma cakap pasal cikgu shafie, cikgu kelas masa standard 5.. diorang kata cikgu tu hensem... giler mak lupa nyah!!! nanti aku check balik album gambar masa skola rendah kot2 la teringat balik.. ayoo!!!!
me being very competitive back in school.. seingat saya skola rendah dari darjah satu sampai darjah 6, exam akhir tahun musti dapat nombor satu punye.. except darjah 4.. time tu sedeh woo.. i was beaten!! pastu masuk macam2 benda laa... segala pertandingan musti masuk except sports heheeh.. farah in sports?? NOOOOO.. i really suck big time!
cikgu amy yang jadi cikgu muzik kitorang back in school.. dia suka main gitar dalam kelas... ajar kitorang macam2 lagu.. palikng tak leh lupa masa dia ajar lagu lagu dalam citer the sound of music.. sampai skarang kitorang suma ingat... and then masa skola darjah lima kitorang girls and some boys (lutfi yangkecoh pun ada hehehe.. lutfi ko memang best!) masuk persembahan.. kitorang girls suma pakai skirt! ingat lagik!!! nyanyi lagu sing after me the word grapes and my little pet.. siap ada soundtrack bunyik haiwan lagik!
masa skola darjah 6 tu suma orang ada nama haiwan masing2.. singa la ape la.. aku ikan buntal, ingat lagik.. kalau hari penyampaian hadia and sports days.. memang aku out punye la.. ingat lagi 2 kali hari penyampaian hadiah masa skola darjah satu and dua tu cikgu dropped me from the performing students sebab i wasnt pretty. kelakar kan, diorang discriminate you sebab you physical apprearances. sebab you tak cantik.it's one of the reasons why i dont think i'm pretty ke lawa ke attractive ke apa ke.. dari kecik i'm always the ugly duckling! till now!
hariss and fizah rahim.. the new entrees dalam kelas kitorang masa skola darjah 6.. dia and azizul time tu kira kiut gile laa.. tapi takleh lupa hariss jalan ada sket2 cam unta.. terhenjut2 sket heheheh.. and he was so pandai! but i beat him during spelling bee comp.. nad dapat third kalau tak salah aku... heheh
fidzah zakri... anak ustazah azizah.. giler lawa!!! aku baek btol dgn minah ni time skola dlu.. (me always jadik ustaz and ustazah's pet in school.. though takde la alim pun hahahah...) ada citer dia dan surat cinta di dalam tong sampah di mana ada boys jadi garbage collectornye... as always kitorang kata.. "LUTFIIIIIIII!!!!" heheehh...
kitorang buat ekspedisi rumah hantu masa balik kelas tambahan.. kasut suma jadik berlumpur.. pastu kat paip besar depan umah amoi tu laa kitorang basuh kasut yang giler kotor!!! siap buat rombongan dari rumah ke rumah lak tuh! aku ingat lagik!! hehehe :))
apa lagik erk... kes bebudak ni kaco sape tah main2 telefon.. sampai parents budak tu datang skola.. wooo giler gempak masa tu!!! hehehe.. zaman jahiliyyah laa katakan heheheh....
fadzli ketua pengawas kitorang.. muka dia asyik blushing jerr hehehe.. asal suruh baca je mulalaa dia blush.. bercakap kat depan pun dia blush jugak.. parents dia ada kedai kain kat jalan tar tu dlu, tapi tak ingat laa ada lagi ke tak skarang.. dia pun kitorang suma dah terlost contact dah.. giler pandai dia nih.. muka cam cina gak.. dia satu kelas dengan amoi dari skola darjah satu sampai 6 la kalau tak salah aku heheheh!!
kitorang suma teringat balik camana kitorang bleh ter-wind up satu kelas.. sebab skola kitorang buat streaming so kununnye la kan.. kitorang dapat the best results back then and ditempatkan sekelas.. hehehe.. tau2 kawan sampai arini heheeh!! sap sangka, amsa first day tu nervous nak ammpus masuk kelas tu takde kawan, alih2 geng woo!!!
and sapa bleh lupa cikgu nasir... tak tau kenapa dalam banyak2 cikgu skola rendah kitorang suma boleh ingat kat dia.. he really means a lot for all of us.. memang serorang cikgu yang est dan dedikasi terhadap kitorang para students... hehehe.. dia ajar kitorang bahasa melayu. buat karangan la apa laa... hehehe.. sronok giler!!!

ok basically tu je la yang sempat saya ceritakan untuk arini... diorg suma dok tunggu biler masa farah nak memecahkan rekod being single nye hehehe.. nanti la dlu.. aku mude lagik sehhhh!! wait like 5 to 10 years more than i tell you yek!!! tu pun kalau ada laa... hahahah!!!

anyhoo.. you guys are so important in my life. glad to know you and to have the memories of all of you inside my head for now and always. my sekolah kebangsaan polis depot frens. amigos para siempre!

carrie wins ai

2005-05-26T16:44:00.000+08:00

hehe.. sorry lama tak mengonlinekan diri... sbb blom bayar bil streamyx lagik laa... bz lak 2 ke 3 arini... sok laa gamaknye baru gi bayor.. ehehhe... dun wori yarr later i update my stories.. apparently memang banyak jugak laa yang perlu diapdetkan.. just a few hints on what's gonna be on really soon (all these dah jadi cuma tak tulih lagik laa)

a) my fren kawen
b) ada reunion kecil2 an skola rendah whereby kitorang sume imbas kembali kenangan lama
c) besday adik saye
d) CARRIE WINS AI!!!!

i knew it! dah agak dah sure carrie menang punye kalau judging from popularity. but bo has a certain edge as well that makes him so special. love both of you!!!

see ya!!

free as a bird

2005-05-20T12:27:00.000+08:00

exam results has just came out. and alhamdulillah i did well :) i am so grateful for everything :D to be given a second chance to grow up and live again. to appreciate things just as it is. to live my life joyfully. and eat more food without feeling sinful :p

today is my last day at ppkp hep. i thanked my boss and my former supervisor (she is now transferred to the Faculty of Art and Design) for everything that they have taught me. i'm so thankful for the opportunity given to know these two people.. yelaa underneath pn nor's former 'nyonya mansoor' image and kak ju's garangness.. there are good people who are more than willing to teach me things about office organization and especially, some bits of computer programming :D and my colleagues which memang sangat best :D i couldnt thank them more. diorang memang best!

tiba - tiba lepas our little jamuan just now, one piece of memory suddenly played inside my head. i remembered elham and i walking and walking kat cempaka kenanga tu lepas amik our final exam for our matriculation, saying out loud (we're undergrads!! UNDERGRADS!!!) and so many goofy and happy things la while we were on our way back to delima college. masa tu both of us are very young and full of life! sure orang kat CK and perindu tu ingat kita gila kan buat aksi2 hepi giler tepi jalan tuh? hehehe..

how simple things were. how happy both of us when everything is over. little did both of us know that 4 years later, our mindset already changed, we both grew up and become adult instead of a bunch of 19 year olds! wow! and who would have thought that fena is going to be the second out of our gang of 6 during matriculation (me, mily, elham, diana, fena and ipah) to get married. diana was the first one though :D we all unanimously voted that mily would be married first, and i still believe that she's gonna be next :D

and yesterday, i had the same feeling again. feeling free at last. well not totally though. have july in my calendar to begin with. still undecided whether to go for attachment or not.. though in my suuposedly earlier plan, i want to go for attachment in either may or june.. and i do think of going for a holiday in june.. solo trip ker.. kalau tak jawabnye movie marathon je la :p

I AM FREEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

supposed current television junkie

2005-05-17T08:11:00.000+08:00

tadik bace post am kat blog dier ttg tv.. ehehehe.. sama la kiter.. manjang tgk tv jer hehehe.. but today i wont be talking about all those TV receps.. cuma some observations that i made. to particular, biler tengok MTV. hehehehe..

shakira's new song

la tortura nama dia. personally i really like this song, though blom btol2 dapat tangkap lagi what does it mean. though segan laa sket nak tengok video clip dier (that one a tad 18 sx sket) so kalau kuar tv selalunye sbb nak dengar lagu dier je la.. buat2 tak nampak jer shakira nye keseksiannye tu. anyhoo i think she sounds really great when she sings spanish song.. macam dia beri everything with all her heart.

dalam lagu ni dia berduet dengan alejandro sanz. satu nama besar la dalam latin music scene. dihe is a multiple latin grammy award winner (tak sure plak dia penah menang grammy ke tak, but one thing for sure marc anthony did won this year), and so does shakira herself. kiranya ni the best of the latin world la.. saya memang ske laa lagu ni pendek kata..

La Tortura
Shakira

Ay payita mía
Guárdate la poesía
Guárdate la alegría pa'ti

No pido que todos los días sean de sol
No pido que todos los viernes sean de fiesta
Tampoco te pido que vuelvas rogando perdón
Si lloras con los ojos secos
Y hablando de ella

Ay amor me duele tanto
Me duele tanto
Que te fueras sin decir a donde
Ay amor, fue una tortura perderte

Yo se que no he sido un santo
Pero lo puedo arreglar amor

No solo de pan vive el hombre
Y no de excusas vivo yo.

Solo de errores se aprende
Y hoy se que tuyo es mi corazón

Mejor te guardas todo eso
A otro perro con ese hueso
Y nos decimos adiós

No puedo pedir que el invierno perdone a un rosal
No puedo pedir a los olmos que entreguen peras
No puedo pedirle lo eterno a un simple mortal
Y andar arrojando a los cerdos miles de perlas

Ay amor me duele tanto
Me duele tanto
Que no creas más en mis promesas
Ay amor es una tortura perderte

Yo se que no he sido un santo
Pero lo puedo arreglar amor

No solo de pan vive el hombre
Y no de excusas vivo yo.

Solo de errores se aprende
Y hoy se que tuyo es mi corazón

Mejor te guardas todo eso
A otro perro con ese hueso
Y nos decimos adiós

No te bajes, no te bajes
Oye negrita mira, no te rajes
De lunes a viernes tienes mi amor
Déjame el sábado a mi que es mejor
Oye mi negra no me castigues más
Porque allá afuera sin ti no tengo paz
Yo solo soy un hombre muy arrepentido
Soy como el ave que vuelve a su nido

Yo se que no he sido un santo
Pero lo puedo arreglar amor

No solo de pan vive el hombre
Y no de excusas vivo yo.

Solo de errores se aprende
Y hoy se que tuyo es mi corazón

AD LIBS
Ay ay ayAy, todo lo que he hecho por ti
Fue una tortura perderte
Me duele tanto que sea asi
Sigue llorando perdón
Yo... yo no voy
A llorar por ti

Bimbos needed to be rescued?

Last night I watched us billboard countdown and interestingly enough, paula did point ot an interesting point about showbusindess. She said that “isn’t it interesting that despite having so many playboy playmates in your video, it wont help up your clips to sail smoothly into the charts?”.

She was referring to this new weezer video entitled Beverly hills whereby it features a scantily clad playboy playmates.. and personally ifound it really boring. Sebab nothing new laa.. just a bunch of women strutting around with their assets paraded to the world with heavy makeup and too much hydrogen peroxide on their hair.. kinda distasteful./ those kinds of bombshells maybe a hoot during 1970s but it’s not now.. though ppl are still going for the booty and whatever you call it thingy.. maybe sometimes sex appeal also cannot sells.

Hmm.. that should be very interesting. Because it shows that people are more leaning towards the talent of the singer and not berely based on physical appearances.. heheh

Rob Thomas

I don’t really fancy him when he was in matchbox 20 but I really dig his current new single lonely no more. Sebab rob ni selalunye kalau nyanyi asik2 lagu yang sedih and depressing aje.. sesekali dia nyanyi lagu yang uplifting pun bagus jugek. I really like this song!

Bald men

Hehehe.. I’m currently liking the images of bald men! As in lelaki yang botak. Entah kenapa I found it really manly. Aritu tengok queer eye dah brapa dah lelaki yang dibotakkan.. giler ensem pastu! And then alejandro sanz and rob Thomas pun dah botak… memang giler comel lah.. and ensem some more!!! Ok more bald guys please!! Hahahahah!!!!!

Toodles everyone!

Life through my brown iris

2005-05-16T15:55:00.000+08:00

I guess I haven't been really writing one of these days.. I just realized that my ramble has been cut short by myself. It's just whenever I go online, it's either me playing those online games, or answering surveys, and ah yes, more surveys :p my thoughts are pretty much scattered one of these days I'll try to sort myself out this very minute.

the unforgivable

I think I did wrote not long time ago about me being so hard to forgive. nape bleh jadik camtu erk? I gave this a thought few days back. Cam kekadang tu, kita buat judgment kita just based on the one time orang tu buat salah kat kita. And terus terusan kita kata dia jahat la, biotch la, ape la... But then biler orang first time buat baik dgn kita, though kita baru jer kenal orang tu kan, kita punye cerita laa tentang orang tu punye supposedly kebaikan laa.. mau berbatu - batu gamaknye! heheheh!!!

orang kata, don't judge a book from its cover kan. I think it does apply to me as well.. sebab bila I look at myself in the mirror, eegads, I cant even smile properly! despite my braces have been removed from my teeth like almost 4 years oredi! looking at it, I see a very garang face. And I did pull those garang face when I go out sometimes.. sebab tak nak kena kacau especially those really gatal men! have to ya know sebab that is how I must survive!! kekadang kalau kena gi shoping mall pun ter-pakse laa berlakon seketika as in macam laa I know up to the very end of fashion scene.. kalau tak mau those salesgirl kat boutiques tu halau saye hehehe..

from here, orang assume saya as a person yang sombong and unapproachable. which sometimes I do am. tapi selalunye tak laa kot.. many were surprised to find out that i'm actually a very goofy person yang sangat ske gelak and have fun! And of course, sesapa yang naik kereta dgn saya terpaksa laa tahan sabar with my either a) incesssant bitching and swearing kalau orang bawak keta lembap and b) my speeding limit! yikes!! memang the complete opposite lah with my supposedly masam face :p but seriously, I susah nak senyum :p hehe selalunye terus gelak je hehehe!!!

which brings me into something yang dah lama saya lupakan: some judgments that I made throughout the years tentang orang. senang2 je kita label orang tu cam gini, cam gitu without giving the said person a chance for him her to befriend you. for you to get to know them. kenal diorang dulu before buat conclusion on who they are.

same goes kalau saya nak tulis testimonials kat friendster. apart from those silly jokes that I posted ke or testi memain ke.. most of the time I would (wait, it's all the time not most yer) I would certainly write on how do I value this person. sebab tak guna kalau kita bercakap on those material possession kalau kita tak kenal dia betul2. do you want to be remembered as the girl who drives a ferrari? or you as in who you really are, as in your personality? and does these comments matter to you? would you change after reading thsoe testimonial? it's something that needs to be taken into consideration as well.

(note: sorry for the crappy spelling.. damn keyboard!!!)

Anyhoo all that I can say is that it’s time for me to take a deep breath and re-assess everything as in my friends, mere acquaintances and such. Never let those masks fooled me this time around.

am i a two-face?

It only occurred to me during this current break that I might be two-faced in nature. Thinking about it, probably I am, judging from my GEMINI side of me, I do tend to go switcheroo in no time. Having said that does that make me being two-faced?

In my opinion, being called two face is like you are the ultimatum of the biotches. Or bahasa melayunye talam dua muka. Memang rasa cam pedih gile la bile dipanggil begitu… tapi how do I see myself then? Am I a two face?

I think my gal pals would understand what am I talking about right, honey? You should know betapa payahnye diri ini utk berlagak as if saya blank. Sebenarnye tak blank. Nak tak nak kena jugak pretend as if I know nothing about many things. Terpaksa sebab kalau tak nanti saya akan dipergunakan. Kalau tak, diorang akan menyakitkan lagi hati kawan ataupun orang yang i love. Susah korang…

Dah brape minggu saya try utk ceritakan tentang benda ni tapi tak kesampaian… tapi kekadang susah gak… sebab takut sangat nanti ada yang terasa la plak.. having said that.. benda dah berlalu and I think I feel better now so saya berani untuk cerita.

Susah kalau korang trapped between people that you value a lot. People that you do care. And even susah lagi apabila you’re between two people that are really close to you. Kalau setakat baru kenal beberapa bulan tu tak kisah sangat kot.. bleh je ignore ke buat tak tau ke apa ke… ni kalau dah tahap betul2 baik dengan kedua2nye sampai bertahun2.. sure korang blank punye ye tak. On one part, ko kesian kat dia ni. On the other, ko kesian kat dia jugak. Sebab to be frank, I did got myself in trouble jugak la time cuti ni sbb stuck in between rifts of people. Suash bila you’re friends with everybody. Camana tu?

Apa yang saya boleh cakap ialah bukannya saya berniat nak menjadi two-face, tapi sebab saya tak nak orang2 yang saya sayang tu got hurt disebabkan perbuatan atau kesilapan orang lain. Yang saya highly value juga. And saya mohon maaf kerana terpaksa merahsiakan benda ni daripada mereka, it’s for their own benefit jugak. Because all of you mean a lot to me.

Having said that, despite everything, I still have my own stand. My own judgment. Despite whatever that I heard, I am fully entitled to have my own opinion. And some might know what is my stand on the matter. No one bleh desak saya utk buat keputusan as it all depends on me.

I’m sorry guys. I’m so sorry. Though I’m still open to hear anything, (which I would love to) kepada orang2 yang terpaksa saya rahsiakan many things to, I have my own reasons to do so. Tak suke sbenarnye tipu orang ni….. let the nature takes its own course kan!

mother's day

Mother’s day aritu kuar dgn family jek.. kitorang bagi kat mama bunge and card heheheh… sori laa mak this month we have so many birthdays la!!! Im going bankrupt already!! Anyhoo we all went to have sushi and then kuar la kejap.. we all get to spend more time with our mother :D though my brother takde skali sebab keje (ah never mind.. you have your birthday coming next week.. you’ll have your cake also heheh!) all in all it’s a sweet small family gathering :D

We all love you mom!!

P/s: sorry again for the previous outburst… sebab the other day memang dah tak larat dah nak dengar apa2 lagi sampai terus pening.. sebab tak boleh beritahu sesiapapun… bila aku dah ok and reda sket baru aku boleh citer… sori korang. I promise I wont write all the details, because it’s not my story to tell… sorry!!!!!

and of course, happy teacher's day!

backstreet boys - incomplete

2005-05-16T14:52:00.000+08:00

for those who knew me ever since high school.. you guys sure know that i'm an obsessed backstreet boys fan. minat giler sehhh!!! i will go out and buy every magazines yang ada muka diorang sure saya beli punye la heheheh!!! tu la my obsession.. tapi suma2 tu stop when i entered college.. i think it was during my matriculation days kot yang i finally stop beli those mags hehehe...

then lately kalau bukak mtv sure ada video clip lagu ni... memang ske la lagu ni.. and yah huh.. nanti dia kuar in making the video this week! dont miss that!

Empty spaces fill me up with holes
Distant faces with no place left to go
Without you within me I can't find no rest
Where I'm going is anybody's guess

I've tried to go on like I never knew you
I'm awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I'm going to be is incomplete

Voices tell me I should carry on
But I am swimming in an ocean all alone
Baby, my baby
It's written on your face
You still wonder if we made a big mistake

I've tried to go on like I never knew you
I'm awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I'm going to be is incomplete

I don't mean to drag it on, but I can't seem to let you go
I don't wanna make you face this world alone
I wanna let you go (alone)

I've tried to go on like I never knew you
I'm awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I'm going to be is incomplete

Incomplete

if you dont know me by now

2005-05-13T11:09:00.000+08:00

as everyone knows, anthony fedorov was booted out from american idol last thrusday. i do expect that ot's gonna be him that has to be sent off, sicne the three remaining contestants were more talented than he is (or so they say). having said that. i do think that actually he performed better than teh other three during the final four performance last night, yet what can i say maybe it's time for him to go...

final two is probably gonna be bo and carrie. no worries for the vonz since she already had an album under her name (bet you guys didnt know erk? eheheh). and i just cant stop thinking about anthony and carrie's close proximity, whether they are only like brotehrs and sisters or you know.. you know? i dont know! anthony has a girlfriend anyhoo.. heheheh..

my sisters were crushed to see their favorite finalist go. sian diorang eheheh...

but anyhoo is it me or memang this season nye american idol is kind of lacking compared to the last season? sebab this season nye therme cam tak meriah sangat.. pretty boring, really, and if you ask me, macam senang sangat nak bagi carrie menang. and she has never been in the bottom three or two, ever! sebab bo has been there, and the vonz pun lebih kurang cam anthony gak, slalu masuk bottom three. hmm.. so as much as fadhlin wanted bo to win, i think it's gonna be carrie.

well it's gonna be revealed anyhoo in two weeks time!

chill out is fun, yes indeedy!

2005-05-10T13:11:00.000+08:00

hiya!! arini saya buat cuti sendiri, ie melepak dgn jayanye kat umah.. sangat malas nak buat apa2 hehehe.. tengah nak mengunpack my things... kakak saya dah sampai.. dia ada kat bawah... wah sangat detail :p sok anta kakak saye pi interview kat intekma eheheh.. and me still undecided as always :p anyhoo here are some things that i realized about myself and my things:

a) i have so many books, some of them tak pernah baca pun! which means that i should be quitting what that i'm currently doing right now, balik KL for good and READ ALL OF EM!

b) i MUST reorganize my wardrobe and get rid of all those unnecessaries FOR GOOD!

c) looking at my disorganized law notes (which reminds me fadhli nape laa tak gtau tak amik nota soga tu.. ponat den tunggu ni ha.. heheheh ;D) i gotta start doing my revision back again man! because i just realized today that i almost forgot everyting i learned in law! eegads that is sooo scary!!! apa aku belajar nih????

d) i've been in between so many people lately sampai me lost count already!

e) my mother praised me for helping her with her kuihs! man that is something that is rarely received one of these days!

f) i just realized that my sisters' maturity level are higher than i was when i was at their age! whoa! (and i kep calling my adik 'gedik' heheheh.. she is lah lately)

g) i realized that i didnt spend loadsa time at home lah one of these days... and i just miss my lepak-ing days at home!

h) i'm still bad at rememberng people's name and phone numbers! i just realized this when i almost sent a message to ken to someone else.. aiya sori la apek... gua manyak lupe looo...

i) i am terrified upon thinking about my exam results! (oh wait, who wouldnt? hehehe)

j) i realized that i'm becoming more bonded with my mother (we are close but maybe sebab the age is catching in, the degree of closeness and similarity of interests dah makin banyak kot!!) but i have less time to catch up with her because i'm not always around!

and above all.......

all these things made me realize that i actually must stay at home untuil the end of this long break that i had!

ah.. now i better start think on whether i should be writing that resignation letter or not? hm... what is the first sentence of it's gonna be erk? heheheeh....

sunday morning rain is falling...

2005-05-08T11:09:00.000+08:00

hehe.. as always, sunday mornings are the perfect time for us to laze around and tak buat apa2 :P but today it's gonna be a bit different sebab arinikan mommy's day (which reminds me.. i havent signed the card yet!!) we all dont know what is our dad's plan for today (makan luar ke kat umah je) so if we go out, we just give her the presents, kalau tak, we will order takeouts and chill at home ehehehe... and me as always will be bz helping mak in the kitchen with the kuihs (man i love buat those kuih karipap!)

things that i'm looking forward to:

movies

kingdom of heaven
sin city
beauty shop
war of the worlds

food

birthday cakes!
chicken chop
tom yam noodle (just had tom yam yesterday at bora ombak, which is kind of nice!)
sushi

outings

my sister is coming on tuesday for her master's interview (yay! ada kawan!)
family outings as always
i missed the recent egypt reunion sbb i got food poisoning two days ago (and still hadnt fully recovered which really sucks!) so maybe more on meeting my friends kot.. i havent seen ina for months!
mid valley movie marathon

and from monday onwards, i'm gonna be back in KL! yay! still gonna berulang to shah alam for a few weeks or so, gonna quit when i feel like doing sop i guess! mak suruh balik KL balik.. which is a good news for me also sbb im also sudah bosan duduk sorang2 kat shah alam! eegads i'm gonna organize my time frame back again:P

see ya!

can they just STOP?

2005-05-05T22:33:00.000+08:00

heheh... cama marah jerr aku malam hari yang permai ni. arini ada this seminar on TOT (training of trainers) kat pejabat pendaftar so kinda bz larr gak.. with the pc crash and kena antar kat psmb lagik.. and ptar nye comp sume went kaput due to the damn lightning, i was left with a tv at home as my only source of entertainment. kinda sounds like a loser kan? or at least that is what zul said aritu masa terserempak dgn dier aritu. heheh. nak kuar rumah pun agak malas sebab faahm2 je laa shah alam ni kan pekan koboi... ala2 sunye gitu. nak buat camana jadi melangut je laa kat umah.

lagi plak arini tak brapa sehat... ni tengah dok berdolak dalik lagi nak gi klinik ke tak.. klinik kat bawah cc ni je... tapi saye tak ske jumpe doktor! and i hate taking medications also... so tu yang malas banget tuh! but i needmore energy for tomorrow! camana nih?

ok.. THE issue. maybe orang akan bengan biler aku start buka topik marriage, sebab i'm so darn scared of it! and ppl (i mean, my grandma and her siblings and relatives) keep on asking me on when is gonna be the day, it's gonna be really soon, it's gonna be so meriah and all.... lagi plak masa my mother's cousin's wedding few days back. she's like 2-3 years older than me and she's married. her sister, a year older than me dah ada one set of twins already. jangan cakap lagi laa those other relatives yang dah start having their very own replica or miniature of themselves (i mean babies ye :D) but can't they understand how terrified i am when it comes to marriage? as in the real thing-post wedding and all? memang la nampak best organize majlis kahwin grand2, dapat pakai baju cantik2 and all (me like the baju cantik part!) but nowadays, 7 out of 10 marriages ended with divorce, and i am so terrified that i would end up in that 7. and laso got beaten up by men, they would be stealing my money and property and all (nampak cam materialistik but come on, korang nak ke your hubbies joli katak your money kat meja judi or main pompuan ramai2 sedangkan itu duit hasil usaha titik peluh korang?), and abaikan anak2 korang, bior je dia membesar dan langsung tak nak bertanggungjawab? i got this all daripada experiences orang, and maybe because of the black holes in my childhood that i wished i wont be exploring ever again, but one thing for sure i dont want to be married if the result is like that! gile apa? that's why i think it's better for me to remain single. alone. though sometimes it does get rough.

tapi itu tidak bermakna yang saya against kengkawan yang dah kawen ke, bakal kahwen ke, tunang ke apa.... i am so happy for them! dan sangat berharap yang diorang akan jadi the remaining three out of 10 tu. and hehe so excited nak tunggu diorang bersama anak2 mereka jugak! tak sabar rasanye.

oh by the way, some of my frens dah nak kawen.. yang insyaAllah saya akan gi:

a) fena's wedding!!!! i'm gonna be home this weekend and i cant wait to receive your wedding invitation!!!
b) kak saba's wedding (she's zuri's sister) and hell yeah zuri, kalau takde ribut petir sampai nye aku kat ampang tu!!!
c) and my skola rendah fren, nama dier hasanuddin (wah.. dlu masa kecik2 pendek je... tau2 skarang dah nak kawen dah! woohoo!) dah brapa belas tahun rasanye tak jumpe. sure giler lain! eheheheh!!!

i don't know. i think i'm just not meant to be married kot. i'm currently imagining my tombstone already (or my memoriam or something)

farah norlaily

expired spinster / crazy old maid

i just hope that none of my friends would be feeling like this. sebab it's not good. let me have all the bad piece of cake. dont let my friends suffer, Allah!

my TV recap throughout the week!

2005-05-02T13:15:00.000+08:00

AIM 2005... is it me or i was sooo darn happy that siti nurhaliza didnt win as much as she was expected this year? bukan apa, not that she got worse ke apa, cuma dah ada others who are better i guess.. hmm.. what that i can say is that our insdustry is growing laa.. banyak album berkualiti yang dihasilkan.. dan bakat2 baru makin banyak.. which excites me. and it's not much of a big surprise that spider's album won this year. my bet is yam would be jumping up and down with excitement once she saw that on TV! right che yam oit!! sampai aku citer dgn mak aku tau ko punye keminatan kat spider tu!! hehehehe.. and siti should change her fashion consultant as well.. she looked terrible! i think her official london pics looked much better than her aim pics. hair being crimped, the chandelier necklace WITH earring??? common error!!!! and dont let me start on the clothing!!! michael ong, rizalman, even radzuan radziwill... HELP THIS GIRL!!!!!! she has loadsa money but if the money is spent on junkie clothes like that, NOOOOOOO!!! i personally would love to see siti showing her own personal style. she would look much better! trust me! (wait, i've heard the last word before.. and it still haunts me. hmm....)
ANTM. eva won!! yay!! guess who is so hapsy with this lovely news!! ME of course!! initially at first i thought yaya could win this thing sebab dia lawa, but after watching the show from week to week, me hating yaya la plak and huh, eva deserves to win! hell yeah baby!
knowing me loving all these celebrity stori the mori and all.. everyone would cleverly guess that i would definitely love watching norjuma's wedding with dato nazim! she is so pretty i tell you! ok laa though i only watch that on tv kan... like the rest of the malaysians (i wish i belong into one of those aristocrats families for one second.. dapat tgk dia kawen live! oh wait, i dont really like all these rich people so... ok!) tengok dia teringat kat this one senior that i got to know in delima, nama dia kak nur 'ain shahrier.. tu geng2 stok norjuma gak tu, smart and pretty and of couse, speaks her own mind. rasanya dia dah balik malaysia dah sekarang, keje with bank negara. she sure is successful nowadays!
ok coming back to norjuma, she is so lucky! alhamdulillah itu jodoh dia :) tapi utk diri saya sendiri, kalau diberi piihan, i wont marry anak orang kaya. banyak pressure. and orang will forever view me as teh person yang nak kikis harta orang tu. uh HELLO?? i would never do that. my parents send me to the uni so that i would be working, earning my own money and indeed growing up and become better persons later :)seronok jugak tgk baju kawen juma. gile lawa! esp baju nikah dia. radzuan radzwill has outdone himself this time around! and of course, sure berbaloi la usaha datin rosmah... nampak cam dia bersungguh2 sangat masa majlis tu... sure dia give attention to detail kan? bestnye juma dapak akak ipar yang best. and hell yeah baby, juma and dato nazim macam pinang dibelah dua :) seronok sangat!
had my dvd watching spree also, tgk white chicks and something's gotta give last night. gelak tahap tak ingat punye! malam ni buat wayang sendiri lagi kot. apa erk citer tv yang best malam ni? i dunno!
constantine kuar AI!!!!!! i've given my comments earlier on so... tak tau la!!!!!
me love my tv as always.. mi go0rda bella dah nak abeh dah tu.. mana bleh miss tu!!!!

speaking of which, i havent showered yet!!! better go and mandi first before my mother begins her bebel session!!! tata! gonna write more, i promise!

the darling bud of may: myself!

2005-05-02T12:59:00.000+08:00

wah... what a very masuk bakul angkat sendiri punye title tuu.. hahaha.. sebab there are so many things yang akan, sedang and telah berlaku pada bulan ni menyebabkanb me luv this month!

mother's day this coming sunday
my brother's birthday on may 24
MY BIRTHDAY ON MAY 30TH!!!!!!! man i am so freaking out thinking about it! i always freak out whenever my birthday comes. and i shared my birthdate with my father (expect something done by my mom which is a no surprise for me every year!), naem, ije, imee, sonie and few more peeps i guess.. at least those are some that i know la :D
result exam kuar next week... senat meeting on either tues or wed.. petang after that it'll be out... im so takut over that one also!
big movies coming into our shores this month!
reality tv show wraps its season, ie american idol and the amazing race! who wins this time around? constantine just got kicked out last friday, and eventhough i dont like him that much, scott savol should be out already long time ago! some on, dont give hims some kind of sympathetic votes viewers! and trying to portray an image as a loving father but beats the mother of his child? HUH? please, dont let this guy become the next AI. anthony gets better though :D bo bice got drug charges as well.. he smoked coke and mary jane man! i'm so not predicting whos gonna be the next ai!!!
amazing race: would romber made it to the top? i dont know why did they decide to compete in TAR sicne amber already had her one million dollar worth of dinero from survivor.. tak tau laa whether this is a challenge on them or something to do with pushing the ratings up i guess?

basically those are one of the things that's in my schedule this month. expect more things to come!

Mirai E - kiroro

2005-04-28T14:39:00.000+08:00

haha.. kisahnye aritu saya telahpun mengepost panjang lebar laa my updates tapi the stupid server wont let me submit it! darn! waste my time aje. skarang saya stuck kat lebri and tengah2 syok mengarang mesej kat mardz (anta surat cinta dari sahh alam wahahahaha) skali kilat menyambar kat cni.. maka terbantut lagilaa usaha saya menulis mesej utk mardz... lagi plak friendsterpun takleh bukak.. bongok punye ptar! tapi takkan nak marah kat petir and kilat kot sbb tak dapat masuk frenster.. nak buat camana dah kilat sabung menyabung.. dah itu ketentuanNye...

tadi masa still bleh masuk fster tadik saya dapat lirik agu ni kat internet.. teringat masa seminar ip tu sebab diorang pasang lagu ni lebuh daripada 20 kali gamaknye (sampai dari aku suke lagu ni sampai aku tensen sbb takde lagu lain lagi kerr...) but it's still a beautiful song though :D

terimalah.... MIRAI E!!!!!!!!!!!

Mirai E
Kiroro
Hora ashimoto wo mite goran
Kore ga anata no ayumu michi
Hora mae wo mite goran
Are ga anata no mirai

Haha ga kureta takusan no yasashisa
Ai wo idaite ayume to kurikaeshita
Ano toki wa mada osanakute imi nado shiranai
Sonna watashi no te wo nigiri issho ni ayunde kita

Yume wa itsumo sora takaku aru kara
Todokanakute kowai ne dakedo oitsuzukeru no
Jibun no sutorii dakara koso akirametakunai
Fuan ni naru to te wo nigiri issho ni ayunde kita

Sono yasashisa wo toki ni wa iyagari
Hanareta haha e sunao ni narezu

Hora ashimoto wo mite goran
Kore ga anata no ayumu michi
Hora mae wo mite goran
Are ga anata no mirai

Sono yasashisa wo toki ni wa iyagari
Hanareta haha e sunao ni narezu

Hora ashimoto wo mite goran
Kore ga anata no ayumu michi
Hora mae wo mite goran
Are ga anata no mirai

Hora ashimoto wo mite goran
Kore ga anata no ayumu michi
Hora mae wo mite goran
Are ga anata no mirai

Mirai e mukatte
Yukkuri to aruite yukou

money money money moooney.. MOOOONEEEYYYY!!!

2005-04-25T09:22:00.000+08:00

for love of money... lagu tema the apprentice! smalam finale apprentice and man saye hepi sangat! though saya split into two sbb tatau nak bagi sapa menang sbb both are strong candidates... i think kelly deserves it (yeah i've been spoiled looong ago by myself, nonetheless) but i wont be putting jen down either. because i think she is smart and she's gonna make a good lawyer :D wait, she's one already right? :D
smalam gak ada tunjuk geng2 apprentice one. bill, the one i rooted for to win last season (i was damn surprised amy didnt get to be the final two) and troy my southern boy :D i just love troy and his humble beginning. even omarosa the biOtch also showed up! hahahah.. hoped that she changed for the better :D
and is it me or i got this deja vu feeling while watching the finale.. sbb bila tgk jen tu kan.. she reminds me of jasmina. seriously! i myself dunno why. teringat kot?
the nights before i watched QE and man, they outdo themselves this time around! diorang renovate a fraternity pad and they really changed the whole frat inside and out! seronok tgk design tempat tu.. rasa cam nak pindah je kat sana.. and the guys are hot jugak la ;)
promo radio era sempena aim ni.. menyampah lagi dgn nana tu.. lagi plak dgr dia kata "nak pegi, nak pegi, nak pegiii!!!" awatlaa hang gedik sangat cek... keep things in moderation la.. cuba laa rilek sikit....
tgk citer drama melayu ni jumaat aritu.. nangis gile2 tgk si safura ni jadik jahat sesangat kat si aisyah ni.. anak dia laa dalam citer tu. uih.. saya tengok citer ni kan, teringat kat mak saya tau... bkan mak saya cam safura tu.. tolong sket yek, though kekadang bebelannye agak bingit gak la... tapi bile dipikirkan yang sekalipun mak tak pernah pukul saya seumur hidup ni. ini siap dideranye anak dia tu.. kesian budak kecik tu!
ada gak tgk cerekarama nasrul genius.. dah mak saya bukak citer tu tengok jela.. sementara nak tunggu QE (dah 2 tv bukak different footie matches nak buat camana... astro memang making money out of our houses.. sampai 3 astronye.. manalaa astro tak kaya) amboi2 depa shoot kat uitm noo.. sempatlaa citer kat mak ttg building2 tu sume.. untung2 dapat diorang ceramah tv free dari saya
ah yes... as always saya takleh miss macam2 aznil.. hehehe i love that show! ske benda2 spontaneous ni.. i hate when things are totally planned. buat kita macam robots. UGH!

that's my report for the week! see ya!

me having a bee-stung mouth!

2005-04-22T16:36:00.000+08:00

saye eksiden sket.. i fell flat on my face kat opis last wednesday.. my hands spreaded wide like an eagle! resulting in my lips so bengkak a la angelina jolie.. blood coming out sume.. nasib tak patah gigi.. tangan and kaki lebam laa.. tapi cuma mulut je saya letak lib balm all the time.. tang lebam2 tu satu ubatpunsaya tak letak.. bior je... memang lebam dia teruk gak laa.. tapi saya machokan diri jerr..
esok paginye kan maulidur rasul.. nak angkat diri sendiri pun sakit2 gak tau.. rasa cam tangan ni ditarik2.. sakit jugak laa nak berjalan... dgn mulut yang besor dan muncung tu lagi la seksa jiwa raga!
tapi dalam2 sakit tu bleh lagik aku kemas dapur umah kitorang.. siap lap tingkap lagi tu!!! memang dasar tak sedar diri tahap tak ingat punye. basuh segala pinggan mangkuk, reorganize the kitchen.. doing whatever that i can laa.. sakan noooo...
insaf seketika sbb smalam maulidur rasul kan... memula radio bilik kitorang terpasang dgn kuatnye thanks to elham's alarm clock (haha.. aku bangun sorang2.. yang lain suma dok tido lagik..) memula pasang radio kuat lagi tu, pastu dgr orang mengaji and dengar orang selawat sume and lelaki2 soleh depan umah kitorang pasang lagu nasyid Ummmmiiii... sah2 radio tu padam sampai la ke esok paginye.. petang2 tu pun kedengaran lagi orang berselawat....
semalam dapat gak le wish maulidur rasul daripada kengkawanku sekalian.. ada satu msg tu memang kena kat aku balik laa.. pedas siot... thanks anyhoo.. aku siap mimpi aku matchmake kan mamat ni kawen tau malam tadi.. dgn elham's cousin lak tu (liyana kot nama dia).. sbb, dalam mimpi tu laa kan, aku nak sesangat bior diorang marry each other. orang kata lelaki baik untuk perempuan yang baik kan? so aku nak sesgt bior one day diorang marry each other. takpun orang2 yang sewaktu dengannye la. sure bahagia dunia akhirat, lagi2 kawan aku tu.. :D cepat2 la kawen korang ni...
anwar robinson keluar dari AI.. come on, give me a break!! scott savol should be out looongg ago!!!!!
sunday ni bawak adik gi pesta buku kat pwtc.. uih banyak kenangan silam tuu!!!

see ya!

what a very tiresome weekend!

2005-04-22T12:18:00.000+08:00

this is a delayed post. i've written it on monday tapi baru arini saya post dia kat sinih.. woohoo!

hiya! it's monday oredi maa.. man i hate mondays!!! sebab kena bangun pagi balik!! uwaa!!! last weekend saya mmg tak dapat nak rehat sangat.. sangat penat!!! Dahla penat keje kat opis, then balik umah pun tgk tv and tido.. bangun dah kene gi keje balik.. waaa..

my weekend began dengan friday nite tgk AI kat s7.. nyaris aku terlepas aku tau.. sbb tertido lps balek keje.. dahla saye stuck dalam opis for like 45 mins sbb ada seekor monyet kat depan opis... takut!!! ingatkan ada orang ketuk pintu, rupa2nye BOOHOO!! a monkey!!!! kelam kabut saye tutup pintu and berkurung laa kat dalam opis tu saaampai monyet tu blah... tu yang balik umah tido flat tu..

dahla satu hal.. terlajak tgk AI!! balik keramat malam gile.. even worst, i left my hp at 7!!!! aiyo.. dah masuk dalam umah pintu umah kunci laa plak!!!! nak tanak kena laa cari public tepon umah suruh bukak pintu (i only have the main gate nye kunci).. uwaa... tak cukup dgn tu kena dgr mak saya membebel lagik tu!!! alamak sabar jela.. tapi tak lama la sbb pastu dia dah tanye "ko nak makan tak? mama dah masak ni.." so melantak laa saya.. and then tido...

saturday

morning start... went to my kakak's konvo kat uitm with the rest of my family... hujan lebat woo!!! and as always me and adik will argue on what flower to buy for nana / didie (my sister).. and then beli gak bunge rose tu.. (uh hello adik, LILY RULES!!!) anyhoo.. congrats to my sister on her convo! very proud of ya!

malam tu jugak balik shah alam lagi skali dari kl.. right after dinner.. sb nak tgk kekwn esoknye.... penat maa!!

sunday

arini kengkawan saya plak konvo. bangun pagi jer dah siapkan bunge2 utk diorang.... sempat tgk masa diorang amik skrol tu and then saya gi padang jawe lak amik kakak and adik saya kat komuter station, sbb akak saya nak pulang jubah.. then setel sume benda baru jumpa member2 masa diorang kuar hall tu... syahdu laa kejap tapi kitorang banyak gelak je.. hepi sesangat sbb dapat jmp diorang!

tak dapat jumpa parents fadhlin and elham atas sebab2 yang tak dapat dielakkan.. anyhoo i'm happy for them both.. mardz cantik sangat aritu! and akish looks just like her dad! yam dgn jambangan bunge purplenye.. siap dapat belon lagi! :D and hehe emma syafawati is one lucky girl ;) puas laa amik gambo dgn kengkawan sume :D though terpaksa jalan menonoooong je sebab nak cari diorang di sebalik lautan manusia.

sori laa tak dapat nak jumpe sume orang sbb terlalu ramai orang! jumpa yang mana dapat! and bile saya balik tengok dalam buku graduan tu baru saya realize yang 2 of my seniors, ms tunku faradiana (also got anugerah naib canselor) and ms ily farhana dapat first class degree!! bangge gile dpt tau kak ily grad with first class sbb dia and another senior tu adalah first students yang dapat first classs degree in law kat uitm ni kalau tak salah saya.. memang saya jadi WHOA kejap la... camana laa diorang leh survive and score gile2 tu??? kak haz and kak mai dapad 2nd class upper. banggenye! llb plak sorang dapat anugerah naib canselor, which makes me question 1 thing: nape elham and hazri tak dapat gak? sbb diorang pun ada satu sem je yang tak dapat dl... hmm.. apapun im so happy for my roommate!! woohoo!!!!!

this is only the beginning, and kita tengok pulak konvo selanjutnye biler hons nanti... :D

mencari tujuan hidup ini...

2005-04-20T11:36:00.000+08:00

cam biasa saya kat pejabat arini.. tengok nombor.. bosan jugak sbb dok atas kerusi and tekan nombor ndan baca nombor.. anyhoo arini ada satu ulasan yang diberikan dalam borang penilaian yang dijawab oleh student2 ni yang menyentuh perasaan saya.

dia kata tentang selama 22 tahun dia hidup ni dia mencari tentang tujuan hidup dia kat dunia ni, sebab selama ni dia tak dapat mencarinya. tapi lepas masuk kursus facilitator kat unit kami ni dia rasa yakin bahawa dia memang seorang yang istimewa yang diciptakan Allah dengan tujuan yang sukar untuk diungkapkan dengan kata - kata.

terharu sungguh saya membaca komen minah ni (responden adalah seorang perempuan berumur 22 tahun). sebab kalau tengok modul yang disediakan pun memang menyentuh perasaan la.. ada artikel ttg kenegaraan, agama, mengenali diri and so much more.. aku tau lee sbb aku yang buat fotostatnye.. ehehehhh!!!

kita semua masih lagi muda and in a thriving search to find who we are and why are we here. apapun kita akan enjoy apa yang ada di sekitar kita dan nikmati hidup ini dengan cara kita sendiri. WOOHOO!!

bak kata iklan walls: hidup biar sedap!:D

clarifying certain things

2005-04-20T09:18:00.000+08:00

haha.. yesterday i had an outburst as in posting my bitchiness pertaining to men. just to claryfy that:

i'm not a lesbian
about the 'suppusedly lelaki soleh', memang la benda tu tak kena to me directly, but i've been in between this saga from the year 2000, be it as a spectator or somewhere in between and i'm tired of it! tak perlu saya ceritakan apa ceritanya sebab sume orang tau.
and saya sedih sbb nampak gaya cam orang tengah gang up over this stori. can't people just understand? rasa cam nak je amik speaker ke mikrofon ke jerit kuat2, "MACAM NI LAA CERITANYA BODOOOOOO!!!!!!! YOU GUYS SUMA DAH KENA TIPUUUUU!!!!" tapi atas nasihat beberapa pihak, saya mengambil keputusan utk tak sebarkan perkara sebenar. biar orang tau sendiri and faham sendiri.
and rasanya sekarang ni pun belang dia dah mula nampak so maybe satu hari nanti orang akan faham la KOT?
and ada antara orang yang jadi penyokong kuat kepada that guy tu, i can feel that you ada berdendam dgn kitorang, tapi since i'm not reachable skarang ni so dia divert kepada yang lain plak. anyhoo.. kalau still terasa and tak puas hati kenapa tak cakap je dgn kitorang? we've apologized to you long time ago sbb kesalahan kitorang tu. takkan tak paham lagi kot... aku sedih sangat sbb aku pandang tinggi orang ni.. sbb dari aspek tertentu orang ni lebih matang la (supposedly) dari aku. tau tak ko buat aku sedeh??

dahla tu.. kang nanti jadi kes polis defamation la plak... tak nak aku masuk court macam sharifah aini dengan siti nurhaliza tu... anyhoo kepada mereka2 yang berkenaan, aku mintak sedarlah wahai umat Muhammad... and kalau nak cakap apa2 dgn aku tu, nak clarify things ke apa ke, aku bersedia sesangat. just tell me.

payah btol la manusia nih...

depression: have i lost my faith in men?

2005-04-19T17:01:00.000+08:00

throughout last week, i've made yet another observations on men. personally, those men around me. some are my friends. some are my foes. some are just people across the street. some are technicians. can be anyone! an waht that i can say is that i am really disappointed with some of them.

macam harini, the technician who repaired the computer and printer in the office tried to hit on me today. that stupid kelantanese fella. thank goodness takde physical contacts kalau tak mau aku report kat atas.. yela... mengarut punye orang. these types of attitudes are one of the reasons why i despise kelantanese men. gatal gelenyar! benci sangat2!!!! can't they control their stupid mouth for just one minute??? ni blabbering the unnecessaries. when i'm at work, i wokd. i'm not looking forward of having personal relationships with any of the people i know. and yes, if i found any of these darn gatal people try to take advantage of me, as in being gatal and all, hell yeah i'm gonna run away. as in pretending the person isnt there. memang dasar tak tahu malu! i might be friendly and all, but that doesn't mean that i'm a whore. ingat aku ni takde keje lain eh, nak cari jantanke apa ke? sorry la. i'm so not interested right now.

lagi pulak bila tgk behaviours of some men close to me. they disgust me! really! sampai hati korang buat perangai camtu. i cannot believe that they can be so stupid to let their brains being ruled by the little general! i don't know how should i regard them right now. why guys, WHY???????

sedih sangat tau. i'm so disappointed upon finding this out. ada juga yang baik dan sangat lurus, sampai ppl took advantage of them pun ada. kinda kesian juga kat diorang sbb senang sangat percaya. kinda sad too. tak tahula camana nak bagi diorang realize perkara yang sebenar. maybe just let it happen naturally kot. let them discover it for themselves.

sometimes, we think that we know the person long enough for us to regard them as a good friend and speak so highly of them. some people kita terpaksa take a very long time to discover who they really are an dyes, that are, in reality, good men. but what went wrong? do they succumb to pressure resulting to them behaving as if their little generals are hardened too hard and they became cocky? eegads i don't know what to say. frustlah!!!! :((:((:((:((

ada jugak yang still buat perangai2 konon ala2 baik laa... baik konon.. and tipu semua orang kononnya dia tu baik laa.. and tak cukup dengan tu, siap spread the stories yang kununnya diala mangsa keadaan. pompuan tula yang jahat, diala yang baik. he's innocent la konon. "saya tak tahu apa - apa!!!" "aku tak faham kenapa dia macam tu!" to these types of men, "uh. HELLO??????" as if i know you yesterday! i know you for long enough to understand how slimy and manipulative you are. macam ni punye orang pun wujud lagi. tolonglah. please, don't use your supposedly wajah soleh and baik tu utk cover apa yang tersembunyi within you. come on, i know the drift already, and no one should give me any lowdown anymore. i have the real picture inside my head for so long i don't need anyone to interpret ke nak stori ke apa ke to cover up your butts. GROW UP! just TELL THE REST THE TRUTH! STOP THIS THING!!!!!!

also, i have another question, why do men love all these vulnerable women? so they then can become the knights of shining armour and save this supposedly lost and hopeless women? really? what about independent women? they felt intimidated with me. i can feel that. because i'm independent and live my own life then i'm the bitch? i'm not the mother material? i'm not the one suitable for you to bring home and show your parents that i'm your future wife? stupid men. SO STUPID!!!!!!! do you think i do want you guys ah? i don't! and if i don't, why do i care? because gosh.. i hate when all the sneering eyes and story spreading began!!! i'm so disappointed with you guys! you treated me in front of me as your friends and silly me, believing that you guys really do want to be my friends believe in your actions only to find out that you guys dissed me behind my back? stabbedme with a sharp knife? shot me on the head? WHY GUYS, WHY???????

due to these reasons, i think that i've lost my faithover men. maybe my life is better without any of them YOU GUYS SUCK!!!!!!!! how could you? kenapa buat macam ni? kalau berani cakapla depan2, jangan buat benda2 camni. be gentlemen about it. let's talk about this like adults. akupun tak suke nak marah2 macam ni.

fid kata tadi, farah, you better look at the bigger picture. as in ramai laki lelaki2 lain kat dunia ni selain diorang. what about the rest of the world? takkan laa semua orang ni jahat? what about our fathers? brothers? diorangpun lelaki jugak. diorang perangai camtu jugak ke? tak kan.... so i dont have to be so opverly paranoid over this.

i don't know. maybe i'm mad because of my hormones are kicking in right now but anyhoo.... maybe i'm not on the verge of giving up men or lost my faith in totality in men, i'm just so disappointed with them. sedih sangat!

man, i need one of those doses of chocolates right now. i've been munching them nonstop for two days!

turning back time?

2005-04-15T17:17:00.000+08:00

tadik aye bace blog naem ttg kenangan masa nak start gi skola... hmm.. masa kat tadika dlu saye kena tadika 2 kali sbb sronok sangat gi skola.. ehehehe.. yang tak bestnye gi tadika ni sbb adala pada suatu hari saya nye baju masuk dek dragonfly.. menjerit2 saya kat tadika tu tau.. sampai menangis2!! pastu orang kat umah amik saye balik.. sbb takut sesangat.. sampai ke hari ni saye takut tgk serangga2 yang terbang except butterfly. waa!!

tapi saya tak nak kembali ke zaman umur saya 5 tahun balik.. sebab masa tu saye ingat something really bad in my life. sesuatu berlaku yang menyebabkan saya jadi diri saya sekarang ni. memang ada stigmatism yang buruk ttg marriage and men. takut sangat!! camana kalau dapat orang macam tu??? though mak kata "mak tak penah ajar korang jadi kurang ajor.. tryle hormat orang" tapi dalam hati saye, memang sya akan ingat. dan still ingat. sbb i'm a person yang akan ingat apa saje yang orang buat kat saye. i know benda ni tak elok, but that's me. really.

tapi kalau umur 4 tahun cam nak laa plak.. sbb masa tu dapat jumpe sudriman in person and naik stage sama dgn sorang budak lelaki ni.. comel kot.. langsung tak ingat nama dia, tapi saya ada gambar dia.. tapi tak nampak sangat muka laa.. ke gambar tu ada dalam albun2 yang lain.. ntah tak tau laa plak.. kalau saye bleh turn back time, saya nak tanye nama dia. nama awak saper erk? skali dah besor2 jumpe balik.. waa baek punye citer telenovela!

brotherhood

2005-04-15T13:45:00.000+08:00

taegukgi. a korean movie yang telah berjaye buat aku menangis gile. the best korean movie that i've ever seen. sedih banget citer ni.. nangis sampai tahap bengkak mata woo.. tak tau camane nak cakap betapa syoknye tgk citer ni..

memule tak tau laa gak pasal citer ni sampai la satu hari dalam kelas ip aku terdengar the boys behind me dok arguing over this movie. sampai bingit telinga aku dibuatnye. last2 geram aku interview dua2 mangkuk ni tanye ape kes nye yang taegukgi nih.. dipendekkan cerita, aku dapat promotion free citer nih. pastu bace suratkhabar a week after that, whereby dalam berita harian kalau ak silap diorang bagi review pasal citer ni. katanye citer ni kureng mendapat sambutan kat mesia tapi mendapat sambutan yang sangat mengharukan (as in bagus gile woo) kat korea. the biggest budget movie ever there, budget dia sama cam nak produce citer puteri gunung ledang, tapi puteri gunung ledang cantik pada visual, tapi it lacked substance. taegukgi, on the other hand (kalau tak silap taegukgi tu maksudnye korean flag, ye ke nad?) sebelum shooting diorang buat thorough research job, and every single thing in thes movie is made in utmost scrutiny. memang nampak laa berbaloi effort yang dikeluarkan. dari aspek storyline, dialog, settings special effects (brape kali laa aku tergezut badak dengor bunyik bom tu) and of course pelakon2 nye casting, memang very good.

IMO the brother (jang donggun) deserves a standing ovation. and aku tgk citer tu pun jadik tensen dengan si won bin sbb "come on la.. ko tak paham ke abang ko buat sume ni utk ko?????" sampai menangis2 aku.. i never had a brother in my life, tapi bile tgk citer ni, ia menyedarkan saye ttg makna satu tanggungjawab dan pengorbanan yang terpaksa kita lakukan demi orang yang kita sayang. abang dia buat suma tu purely utk adik dia. how protective the brother was!

selalunye aku malas sket tgk citer perang2 ni.. slalunye saye bagi bapak saye je tgk citer2 ni.. sbb bapak saye mmg peminat perang2 ni.. try tgk dia punye collection of books regarding to war, memang berpina mata dibuatnye.. tapi citer ni memang ada exception la. it's now in my list of favorite movies as well.

smalam, biler abeh citer ni saya teringat buku the 5 people you meet in heaven sebab dalam buku tu ada watak the second person eddie met in heaven ie, his captain masa perang. whereby eddie blamed him sbb buat dia cacat (tempang sket kot kalau tak salah) as a result of war. little eddie knew that he did it so that dia dpt selamatkan eddie. and he died masa perang tu. dia kata, yang penting dia dah jalankan tangungjawab dia: make sure all his platoon members selamat. walaupun dia terkorban. peeps, please go and read this book. i beg you!!! this month dia ada tunjuk kat astro kat channel hallmark. tengok tau!!!!

pagi ni plak saya teringat ttg citer the shawshank redemption. citer ni memang one of fav citer saya. tim robbings dan morgan freeman blakon citer ni as two inmates in a prison, whreby andy (watak tim) dipenjarakan sbb membunuh isteri dia and her lover and how he struggled for freedom. dekat brapa tahun dia gali lubang dalam penjara tu semata2 nak keluar dari situ. dia sorok di balik poster pompuan cun. bcuz he was imprisoned for an offence he didnt do. he lost his life as a successful banker for that. and red (watak morgan freeman) jadik kawan dia merangkap indirectly mentor dia masa kat jail tu. the acting was superb la. rugi tak tengok citer ni. tengok tau!!

dah laa.. lapar plak asik menaip jerr.. see ya guys soon!

2005-04-15T13:32:00.000+08:00

the tale of brotherhood at war

sharing the joys in our lives...

2005-04-15T13:03:00.000+08:00

heheh.. at last pandaipun aku letak gambor kat blog ni.. for so long i wanted to share my joyful moments with people that i love in my life here tapi tak pandai.. so tadi amik masa blaja cane nak buat benda2 ni suma... anyhoo makin banyak laa post bergambar lepas ni.. eheheh!!

ok there are three general news yang saya nak share arini. actually dah tau few days back, tapi nak citer je mula laa lupa kan... tak lupa pun.. bz.. nak buat cane kan.. anyhoo here they are!

a) congratulations to my fellow sspian, melati abdul hamid yang menang best speaker (world) at phillip c. jessup mooting competition kat washington DC! she made malaysia proud, the school proud, UIA Law faculty proud and of course, her family proud. eventhough i am not close to her, i am very happy for her :0 bangga gile tau bile tgk muke melat kat utusan pagi tu.. sbb i knew she competed in that competition sbb i met her last january after all these years. dah lain sungguh dia. memula tgk cam "eik, melat ke ni?" anyhoo she was watching her fellow frens that day. she'll be competing in few weeks' time. and now she's on top of the world! congrats!! :D:D:D:D

b) secondly, my friend, intan ezura messagedme on the same day i found out about melat that she and her husband are expecting a baby!!! wow i am ao happy also!!! tak sangka intan yang manja dan lawa tu akan beroleh cahaya mata dalam usia yang muda. this lady kan memang lucky, aritu dia masuk pop kuiz dgn jihan, diorang menang, sempurnakan harimu dapat 20K, and now a baby on the way! wow!! seronok sangat!! tak lama lagi jadik auntie farah laa saye :)

c) thirdly, congratulations to my graduating friends! so happy for all of you :) sedih ada gak but i cant live under that sadness forever kan? all of you have made your parents proud. yay to all of you!

2005-04-15T12:47:00.000+08:00

surayya in her usual attempts in becoming malaysia's next top model :P

2005-04-15T12:45:00.000+08:00

surayya saad: the love of my life. kaki posing minah ni!!! p/s: sama tak muka kitorang???

2005-04-14T16:42:00.000+08:00

mama i laa. kenapa, tak percaya kaa?

2005-04-14T16:37:00.000+08:00

adik2 saye: sabri, sakinah, surayya

2005-04-14T16:36:00.000+08:00

pemandu kureng berhemah :P

come on laily!

2005-04-14T16:23:00.000+08:00

huhu... kisahnye arini gi jcard day kat bukit raje dgn mily.. mak datuk dekat 2 jam cari parking je.. walhal bukit raje tu blakang umah kitorang je! penat banget seh.. memang naik angin laa tadik.. nasib baik ada mily.. kalau tak mau meletup!!! pastu kan ada satu lagi ni nama dia come on eileen.. tgh cari parking masa tu.. bunyik dia cam come on laily so kitorang pun tergelak2 laa.. siap buat parody lagi pasal lagu tu kihkihkih!!!

tapi biler masuk jer shopping complex. perasaan tensen mule ilang.. memula kata dgn milia 'ala.. at least kite tgk apa yang ada..' skali aku plak yang terlebih soping.. got two tops dalam jusco tu, beli vcd taegukgi (he was cool and my tutor fren dah abeh! waa!!), then got this lovely skirt from padini, and beli laa groceries sket.. and of course sushi. sbb lapar woo.. orang offer promotion makanan aku amik je sume.. sbb laparrrr!!!!

neway, opis kitorang dah berfungsi macam biasa. yay!

second point, aritu tgh bawak keta.. tengahari smalam, before disaster. kunun nak jadik pemandu berhemah.. akupun bagi le sekor waja ni kuar daripada fakulti law (mood tgh baik masa tu.. cube kalau time aku balik keje!) tapi waja tu kata takpe laa ko jalan dlu.. tgk2 DR SHAD!!!!!!!! alamak idola ku!! memang ciri2 lelaki idaman laa..: berilmu, beriman, dan beramal. woohoo!! tapi dia pendek la.. and tua. tapi takpe minat jugak!! ehehehe tersengih2 le aku bagi prof shad bawak keta dier... aduh mak. sampai dekat umahpun tersengih2 lagi!!!

thirdly, smalam sbb tak leh tido (kepenatanpun tak leh tido gak)... saya telah membuat tindakan drastik rearrange bilik tido kitorang.. uih sakan no.. sume benda aku alih.. memang macho larr seketika.. and aku puas ati gak laa dgn resultnye cuma maybe nanti aku update lagi sket kot! ehehehe tgh mood rajin laa katakan.

see ya soon!!!

man workers. wanted.

2005-04-13T19:52:00.000+08:00

hiya! baru je lepas berpenat lelah mengerjakan diri :p.. tatau laa nak citer camana idup arini so.. here we go!

a)tadik bukak frenster.. so nampak boyot anta msg psal dia jual bunge... alamak... ko sure jual bunge ros punye kan boyot kan... tak ke la plak kat bunge ros.. kalu bagi orang maybe takpe gamaknye.. terus terkenang pebret flower saya sepanjang zaman: casablanca lily. ataupun nama mudahnye lily putih yang besor tu. maaacammm saye eheheheh.. so dok surf internet ni menghayati keindahan bunge casablanca lily! cantiknyeee... boyot sure tak jual bunge ni gamaknye... takpe nanti kite cari kat petaling street ye kengkawan!!! p/s: kalu aku konvo nanti aku nak bunge ni yek... hint*hint* kepada kengkawan sekalian!

b) arini tunggang langgang opis kitorang... dahla tak gtau nak pasang benda baru tu arini so kelam kabut laa akak ati tu tadik mengemasnye.. aku plak balik 7 jap.. tido eheheh.. datang2 je dah jadik padang jarak padang tekukur gitu.. so tadik kepenatan jugaklaa mengangkat barangan tu naik!!! rasa macam nak pengsan je... tu la pasal bagi post nama man wanted tuu.. bagi laa yang lelaki keje kat sini.. ni sue pompuan jerr.. teruk gak laa mengangkat brg2 tu.. kalau ada boipren bleh gak buli suruh angkat. staf lelaki pun ketandusan kat sini. jadi aku laa yang kena mengangkat barang2 yang berat nak mampus tu! ya Allah tak tau laa nak kata apa. asa cam nak pengsan pun ada. adusssss!!!!

da mengangkat tu satu hal, ni ada plak sorang akak yang laser tahap atom bom yang opisnye sebelah opis aku tu memperkecil2kan diri ni. memperlekehkan diri ni. amboi... depan aku sket punye baik, pijak semut tak mati! tapi ade la laser sket2 tu.. tapi tadi time aku takde kutuk punyee baik lagi.. amboi.. ape ingat ko besar sangat? tadi nasiblaa laki awak tu pun keje kat pejabat bendahari kat hep tu bleh tlg. kalau tak merangkak gak kan.. so lain kali nak buat apa2 statement tu bebaik laa sket.. peliharalaa sensitiviti masarakat sekeliling ni. ni ckp tahap tak ingat punye. menyampah aku.

c) smalam kuar sorang2 lepas balik keje.. gi bukit raja jap.. tgk wayang citer be cool. ni yang tensen sket. ok la si minah ni dok sblh aku dgn balak dier. kalau ye pun citer tu bosan bagi kau, tolonglaa jaga sensitiviti orang yang nak tengok citer tu cam aku ni haa.. so tolonglaa jangan nak buat aksi menyakitkan ati kat situ.. bongok!! anyhoo i think the movie is ok. an interestng satire. diorang show what is really going on in hollywood ritenow, including those hybrid cars (sape tgk oscars aritu sure tau punye eheheh) and saw satu kapel ni (member aku gak) berdating... ehehehe tapi tanak kaco laa..akupun buat2 tak nampak je.. kasi can laa... beli buku satu nak bace kat umah.. nanti aku tulis reviewnye :)

d) norelle kuar antm.. ugh ann is so da bitch rite now. hate yaya also. so i'm now rooting for eva to win. GO EVA! sedeh gak norelle kuar, sbb i like her!! she has great personality, cute and baik sangat!!!! ske lah!!!

i think that's all for now.. next time aku akan letupkan opis akak tu plak.. ahahahah!! (gelak evil >:) heheh)

tata for now!!!

mataku merah karena kureng tido

2005-04-12T16:38:00.000+08:00

kwang kwang kwang.... smalam jumpe kengkawan lama di kedai kopi taman tasik tu... ehehehe melantak sakan with my gal pals!! sangat hepi sebab lama gile tak jumpe diorang.. though my darlings elham and mily takde smalam... anyhoo i had a blast last nite. sampai tertido kat umah diorang aleh2 bankit dah kol 7.30pagi... yikes!!! mana leh lambat.... so sori kat akish sbb tadi nak cepat sesangat ehehehe...

arini naik angin gile dengan mesin fotostat sbb dia buat hal ala2 manja plak... kalau nak rosakpun janganleee time aku tengah banyak gile keje ni.... bz laa takde masa nak berteleku kat depan mesin tu adap muka dia... kalau dia ada suara and gambar cam tv tu takpelaa jugak ni asik asik bunyik ZzzZZEeEEeEeeeeeeTTTT!!!!!! poning kopalo den!

there is a high probability saye sampai sect 7 lambat arini.. mau balik kol 6 stengah lagik gamaknye cam smalam.. banyak benda nak buat arr.. sampai perancangan nak tgk wayang pun manjang tergendala jerr... tapi takpe laa sbb saye gi tgk sorang anyhoo so takde apa masalah laa.. esok kot gi tgk be cool tu. sure lawak kan? sbb tgk ensemble dia cam best jerr?

ok.. apa isu arini erk? any of my blogreaders yang ada dengar radio rima tak? dia nama betul dia radio irama melayu asli.. skarang ni memang sakan naik laa isu ttg radio ni.. saya dengar gak kalau saye boring.. and kalau tensen especially kalau angin kesunyian tu ada, sebab homesick kan heheheh.. anyhoo diorang dah tukar format radio ni daripada purely main lagu melayu asli and langgam and such (senang citer lagu melayu lama la) kepada all these lagu klasik tak kira bahasa. no offense, tapi saya rasa that is another idea yang agak mengarut gak laa. sebab pada saya, biarlaa radio rima tu kekal hala tujunye, janganlaa nak merosakkan radio tu. sedih je mendengarkan radio tu skarang ni. mak saye memang tak stuju nye laa.. dahla dia dok bertemankan radio tu memanjang kalau dia kat dapur tu kan.. and as for myself, i prefer rima daripada era anyway.. so please laa rtm, ubah laa balik konsep radio rima tu.. kalau nak lagu tamil lama, buat laa stesen radio lain. kan senang?

sabar jelaaa...

banggakah aku bergelar melayu?

2005-04-11T16:07:00.000+08:00

chewah.. aloa2 patriotik gitu biler buat title camtu eheheh.. anyhoo kisahnye begini... lately camacam cerita diwarwarkan berkaitan dengan orang melayu and i think, i do have a say in this sebab tak kirala orang putih ke coklat ke oren ke saye tetap melayu and orang malaysia.. eheheh kalau tak camane bleh lepas blajar kat uitm ni kan?

ok.. rasanye suma orang dah tengok iklan budi bahasa budaya kita kat tv tu.. which one yang korang prefer tengok? yang putra lrt tu ke yang ada nyanyi lagu siti nurhaliza tu? personally saya lebih suka iklan lrt tu, sebab diorang tak perlu cakap apa2 tapi dapat menyampaikan satu mesej yang amat jelas berkaitan dengan budi bahasa masyarakat kita. no offence to siti nurhaliza, saya mmg tak minat dia pun, tapi bukan lagu siti yang nak saya kaitkan di sini tapi lebih kepada konsep dan impak iklan tu sendiri. pada saya iklan yang guna lagi siti tu terlalu stereotaip. sesiapapun boleh buat iklan camtu. terlalu simple sebenarnya. orang kita ni bila tengok iklan2 camtu tak bergerak minda mereka sebenarnya. iklan tu terlalu citrawarna-ish bagi saya. that is why i prefer iklan putra lrt tu. pandai si adlin aman ramlie tu berlakon. kudos to him!

having said that, ramai laa plak orang kat mesia ni yang marah biler iklan tu kuar tv. katanya, ia telah menyentuh sensitiviti orang melayu. sebab orang melayu ditampilkan sebagai bangsa yang kurang ajar, begitulaa bunyiknye. sebab apa? tak bagi orang lain duduk kat lrt tu. yang berbudi bahasa ialah orang cina, india (dalam iklan tu la, nanti dlu...). so it has somehow caused an outrage in the society sampai keluar dalam suratkhabar and masuk sidang parlimen!

i think all these hype of bringing this issue into parliament is just plain stupid! sorry to say, tak sangka orang yang saya ingatkan sebagai cerdik pandai ni tak tahu menilai antara kaca dengan permata. bak kata p ramlee dalam citer musang berjanggut smalam "tak tahu menilai yang mana perempuan dengan betina". sounds harsh but that's the truth! as a true KLite I am, i've had my fair share of public transportation woes as well.. though most of the time i do drive to anywhere i go, tapi bile saye naik kenderaan awam tu, especially putra lrt (which IMO provides the best service compared to other means of public transportations in malaysia), memang yang slalu tak bagi duduk tu orang melayu. diorang buat bodooo je. ada ke patut? ada skali tu saya bawak baby kenit lagi (adik saya yang bongsu) pun diorang tak bagi duduk juga. ada laa cina ni bagi saya duduk. see? memang iklan tu betul.

orang melayu kita ni memang dah terlebih manja. sampai alpa dan leka. kalau kena tegur sket mula laa melenting. mula laa nak bangkitkan hak keistimewaan etcetcetc... tapi kalau buat salah, time tu laa nak claim under article 8 of the federal constitution, that is equality before the law. ntah apa apalaa diorang ni. pada pandangan kita, kalau dah kena tegur tu, berubahla kan. tupun ada nasib baik ada orang macam yasmin ahmad yang peka dengan isu dalam masyarakat kita ni, dan mampu menghasilkan iklan sebagus tu. all my praises go to her, hats off!! :)

it is clear from my viewpoint that the issue pertaining to iklan lrt ni adalah satu isu retorik. yang tak perlu kita nak utarakan dalam suratkhabar. sampai masuk dalam sidang parlimen. sampai adik2 si adlin tu diludah orang. bodoh punye orang. abih kuat pun ini telah menunjukkan bahawa adlin telah berjaya convey the message :) kudos to him again :) untuk orang2 yang bodo sangat tu.. pada saya tak perlu la kita marahkan mereka ni.. macam mencurahkan air ke daun keladi je. baik kita biarkan mereka2 ni berfikir sendiri. biar dia sedar sendiri kan?

ok kita lupakan citer tu kejap, ni saye nak share plak sket pengalaman yang turut membuat saye lagi appreciate bangsa saye sendirik. camni kisahnye, sabtu aritu saye gi anta keta saye ke car wash kat seksyen 3, ala yang bertentang dgn restoran syed tu! pi laa antar si ahmad tu mandi.. siap vakum sume.. sbb dia dah busyuk sangat! ntahcamana masa diorang nak jiruskan si ahmad tu dgn air, prangg!!! terjatuhlaa side mirror keta saye tuuu.. tapio saye tak panik, bleh rilek dan tenang lagi.. tapi pakcik tuan punye car wash tu yang risau jugek.. so saye dgn pakcik tu pun pi laa beli cermin keta tu... dekat section 24. original lagi. 50 inggit duit pakcik tu terbang. kedai yang kitorang beli cermin tu tanak pasangkan.. pi laa kedai cina dekat2 situ gak.. diorang buat free of charge, ye laa pasang cermin je pun! tapi diorang memang treat kitorang baik laa.. memang saya tabik sangat2 kat pakcik tuan punye car wash dgn cina tu sebab diorang sangat hospitable :) syabas pakcik! syabas apek! ni baru btol rakyat malaysia yang bersatu padu tak mengira kauM :) haaa.. dan sayapun dapat free car wash petang tu.. yippee!! time kaseh pakcik!!

see? sape kata kita tak boleh hidup bersatu padu? cuma kena caranye saje.. ;)

now i'm proud to be a malay!

Romance: how it evolves around my life

2005-04-09T12:45:00.000+08:00

Day by day. Little by little, more often than not, when the matters pertaining to love comes in front of our eyes, kite suma akan membuka mata dan telinga. Pantang dengar erk? Suke atau tak, love is always in the air. Tak kira la depan tv ker, dalam buku ker, kat movies ke, kat lebri ker.. mahupun di halaman rumah saya (ehm….) I can feel that love is filling the air that we breathe. Dasat kan?

So arini saye nak share sket ttg my experience pertaining to romance and how it develops and evolves throughout my maturity level. Hahaha.

romance novels are mushrooming everywhere by various authors. Some are sweet, some are tragic, and heheh some do have its fair shair of lust :p hahaha

Adik saye yang baru nak masuk umur 12 tahun tu pun dah pandai baca buku romance. Tapi dia bace buku melayu je laa.. yang terbitan karangkraf kot. Memule tu bapak saye yang belikan kat dier, tapi lama2 dier dah ternaik suke plak bace buku2 tuh.. banyak jugaklaa koleksi buku cintan dier.. bleh main tukar2 dgn mak lagi gamaknye hehehe… tapi saye tak minat sangat bace buku romance melayu, sebab citer dia balik2 samaaaaa aje. Buhsan la.

Dlu2 zaman saye kecik2 dlu saye bace gak buku2 kisah2 cintan2 ni. Seiring sejalan laa dgn koleksi sweet valley tu (uih dulu buku2 tu murah lagi.. bkan cam sekarang, mau berlubang poket saye kalau nak membelinye kan?) tapi skarang ni dah pindah2 umah sah ilang banyak buku2 tu.. tu tak masuk lagi orang pinjam tak pulang.. Buku citer melayu yang paling saye ingat saye bace masa saye skola rendah dlu ialah satu cinta tragis yang nama dia tenggelamnya kapal van der wijck. Penulisnya ialah pak hamka. Hamka ni slalunye dia tulis buku agama tapi ni antara buku romance yang dia tulis gak la. Malas la plak nak bagi lowdown ttg citer ni tapi kalu korang nak berkenalan dgn citer ni, korang tgk laa citer haryati yang si umie aida jadi heroin tu.... apapun citer dia memang tragis laa antara si zainuddin dgn hayati tu... kita dapat hayati cerita cinta diorang ni thru surat surat yang diorang antarkan (ok laa ni citer cinta zaman dlu2, skarang orang bercinta pakai email, sms.. mms... ntah ape SSS tah kan).. apapun nanti si zainuddin tu mati laa... ending citer tu kalu tak salah diceritakan oleh kawan dier si muluk tu.. ke malik? Eh muluk laa... apapun buku ni memang best la. Dan sedih la. Memang a good read. Gi la beli buku dier.. zaman saye skola dlu harga dia dalam 12 inggit je rasanye.. tak tau la skarang...

Pastu naik high school.. masuk skola pompuan plak tu... teringat lagi schoolmates saye yang jadi overly happy tatkala pesta buku menjelma (ala kitorang sume hepi punye laa.. ada alasan nak kuar daripada skola dah kira ok la tu) zaman ni baru nak berjinak2 bace buku romance yang english punye laa.. aku ingat lagi tgk bebudak ni borong buku romance 5 inggit kat pesta buku (tapi time tu tak pandai nak bace lagik.. innosiente la katekannn) last2 terkantoi la plak dgn cik hamizah warden kitorang tu.. ingat lagik dia panggil prs gi umah dier and aku pun terrrpandang laa buku2 lusty romances yang dia dapat amik tuuu.. eheheh… sampai masuk assembly tu nama judith mcnaught.. hehehe teringat aku ustazah noor einee yang pakai tudung itik kalu dia rounding prep.. heheh! Anyhoo dipendekkan citer zaman tu laa aku mengenali judith mcnaught dan danielle steel.. dlu tau tgk citer danielle steel kat tv je.. skarang ni dia nye buku plak… heheh.. time ni fantasi tak brape berkembang lagik… lagi satu buku citer yang aku teringat la bace dlu ialah citer cinderella sbb masa tu pelakon dia buat promotion kat pwtc.. rasanye halida pegi kot masa tu… anyhoo memang sakan laa bace buku tu… tapi bile tgk citer dia, punyelaa tension dgn si haliza misbun.. sbb dier tergedik2 dgn si ahmad idham tu kan.. tu la pasal sampai aritu ada satu drama ni diorang blakon 2 orang terus tanak tgk tu! Memang tahap ban laaa.. hahaha!!!! Tapi zaman ni saya lebih membaca buku2 sweet valley lagik laa.. hahah zaman tak pandai and tak brani lagik nak membaca buku romance :P oh ye lagi satu buku citer yang saye ingat bace zaman2 ni ialah lamaran kedua. Buku mak saye jugak, hehe asik2 kebas buku dia jer kan hehehe.. me love raiding my parents collection of books..anyhoo buku ni memberi gambaran berbeza tentang apa yang saye slalu angankan. A very handsome hero with his dashing and debonair looks J dah bertukar kepada hero yang agak hampeh la. As in hero yang mempunyai cara yang berbeza untuk menunjukkan kasih sayang dia. Senang cakap, not yur conventional hero laa. Memang it’s a foundation for my next criteria of perfect guy la. Hehehe.

Then biler dah naik universiti, macam2 buku saye bace, daripada those lusty romances sampai ke chic lit, buku lawak jenaka sampai ke those boring law textbooks (whomever that can really tell me what is the point that Andrew Phang tried to deliver in that ridiculously thick contract book memang you are a genius la) and masa ni harga buku pun dah mahal. Paling koman 30 lebih. Seksa gak poket ni kalu skali beli, alhamdulillah skarang ni dah ada kedai buku secondhand yang nama dia pay less books tu… save sket duit saye.. sbb kat sini buku2nye harga murah giler!

Dan bile usia dah makin meningkat ni, saye dah kurang sket membaca citer2 cintan sangat. Though kekadang tu for fun and relaxation saye bace jugak. Tapi biler dah besar ni saye ske gak membaca buku2 yang berkaitan dgn adults nye conflict, on how we live our adulthood, the problems that we are faced with, tentang love and life itself. On how big its value is, and bukan semata2 nestling nicely underneath a beautiful sky with shades of rainbow. Life itself is not that sweet. Instead it is bittersweet, and we should be savoring it the way we want it to be.

Untuk diri saya sendiri, walaupun mungkin sekarang ni nsaya dah agak matang sket daripada dulu, mungkin laa kan heheh :p tapi itu tak bermakna saye nak paksa diri saya utk jadi matang yang teramat. Instead I learn from all of it and I live my life the way that I want it to be. To write my own romance. To live on my own story. Keluar daripada kepompong biasa yang kita slalu dengar. Kalau cinta kena ikut cara ni. Tak bestla kalau our love story tu sama aje kan? So it is better this way.

Right now, my romance has not yet have its beginning. Prologue je yang panjang berjela. Epilogue apatah lagi. Apapun, I’m so keen on finding out how the story is going to be written. Would it be like Hamka’s tragic love story? Or would it be like Judith McNaught’s stories where all these tall, dark and handsome guys would be sweeping my head and toes away? Or would it be like those I’ve read in chic lits, about you meeting a guy that was your therapist, or your neighbour, or the jerk you worked with and such, but ended up having a great romance anyhoo? Mine should be interesting. Eventhough I don’t know how it will begin at the first place, I think it’s gonna be worth it.

A non-conventional love story at the day and age of information technology. How would that sounds?

days of farah's lives :)

2005-04-09T12:44:00.000+08:00

how do i spend my time? hmmm.. saye sbenarnye ske dok umah! lagi plak kalauhari tu rancangan tv best best belaka.. lagi laa tanak kuar umah! i'm addicted to tv. seriously!! emang laa orang kate cam bodo je teraddicted dengan kotak kaler bodo tu kan.. tapi kotak kaler tu laa yang menghiburkan hati saye selalunye :) yela kalau hari2 nak tgk movie mau bankrap saye!!! saye sangat ske tgk tv!!!

rite now, tengah sakan pasang cd citer korea. memang menyentuh perasaan laa... sakan nooo!!! yelaa tgk balik citer winter sonata tu kan... sedih woo... jun sang oh jun sang!! tapi saye lebih suke tgk min hyeung.. sbb dia gatal and dia tau apa yang dia nak dalam idup dia. hehehe. and dia managed utk keluarkan yoo jin daripada kesedihan hidup dia. haa... kan ke best dapat laki camtu? memang laa dia gatal.. tapi gatal yang kita nampak ;) tapi kalau dari aspek rupa paras.. saye lebih ske tgk jun sang masa dia dah buta tu.. dekat2 nak ending tu... sbb nampak kemas sket... and less highlights on his head. sebab muka dia bulat, buat rambut kembang tu lagi nampak dia macam singa hehehe.. tapi idung dia cantik laa :D

winter sonata tu kalau time jiwang.. kalau time enjoy2 plak ske tgk citer he was cool tu!! mak datuk ntah brape kali tah tgk citer tu, and dah brape kali tgk pun saye still tergelak2!! and hero dier lagik ensem daripada si jun sang tu... nama dia song seung hoon... ala yang berlakon citer autumn in my heart tuu.. tapi saye tak minat citer autumn in my heart tuu... biler tgk dier dalam citer ni terrminat laa plak.. sbb saye mmg ske lalaki yang macam tu.. yang skali pandang cam bangang je... rupa2nye best sangat.. ingat lagik ending dier "a true love requires no words". memang btol pun! when we are with the persons that we love, kita tak payah nak membebel panjang2 ke apa dgn dier, cukup dgn tgk dia pun kita dah rasa ok. peh cam best jerr ayat aku nih :p

aktiviti lain kat umah tu tak lain dan tak bukan ialah memasak. ye laa nak lawan dgn lelaki2 soleh yang tinggal dekat depan umah kitorang tu... dah brape bulan kitorang dok sana baru tau yang rupa2nye jran yang depan umah kitorang tu rupa2nye hot stuffs kat blok kitorang!!! laa ye kee..... kitorang memang tak pay attention sangat pun.. abeh kuat pun main hoi hoi je dengan diorang :P tapi adik2 tu memang baikla...

apapun the bottom line is, i really love cooking. although takdelaa pandai sangat, tapi setakat bleh survive kire okeh laa tu :D and i really love it though tak pandai laa sangat. petang2 ni terbayang plak yam nye cucur ikan bilis... sedap banget!

tu laa keje kitorang kalau kat umah tu.. cuma takde fridge je.. kalau ada fridge memang laagi banyak stok makanan laa kitorang ni... tupun almost every day kitorang akan masak. paling bodo pun goreng telur or ikan bilis laa... makan dgn nasi panas. sedap woo!!! tapi menu rasmi yang slalu dimasak laa kat umah kitorang tu ialah cucur yam, sambal sardin, sayur goreng, sup sayur and aku nye personal pebret, tomyam :) kalau ada duit lebih sket goreng udang laa.. cam smalam eheheh... alamak lapar laa plak cakap pasal makanan ni....

aritu lepas xm saye panik seketika, sbb hp ilang ko!!!! gamat laa diri ini seketika.. sbb gabra tahap yang teramat :p siap gitau prof vijaya, report kat opis fakulti and gtau en adlan jugek.. memang gabra laa.. siap telefon yam mintak tolong carikan.. uih panik aku... yela i'm bad at remembering people's numbers!!! yang aku ingat number milia, elham, umah saye, mak saye, adik, yam, fadhlin... tu je laa rasenye... sbb hampeh tatau nombor orang lain.. kalau ilang nahas saye nak menjawab dgn mak bapak saye!!! uih gabra laa kejap!!! terus tergendala rancangan nak ke kl lepas exam tu.

balik je umah dapat berita gumbira daripada yam.. DIA DAH JUMPE HP SAYE!!!!! thanks yam!! mmwah me lap yu!!!!! weih biler nak aku blanjer ko nih??? aku dah berniat ni, kena buat jugak tau!!!! woohoo!!!

nasib baiklaa jumpe balik. kalau tak ilang semata memang nahas je aa... mau tak dapat nak contact member2 sume lagik... yela penting telefon tu.. setakat nak telefon mak bapak and housemates je pun... tapi still penting tau!!! sbb mahal telefonnye.. saye dapat birthday present last year... lagi plak camera phone dia nye resolution sangat clear.. mana nak cari enpon camtu!!! alhamdulillah.... lega rasanye...

alamak.. yang ni segan sket la plak... reminder to myself: kemas rumah balik keje ni..... serabut mata memandang!!!! yikes!

lelaki: pria budiman or jantan kabaret?

2005-04-09T12:31:00.000+08:00

ok.. aku tau sepatutnye aku stadi evi skarang.. and i'm searching for this case yap ee hong kat lexis.. tak jumpe lagik tapi takpe try search lagi skali...

nway ni laa antara benda yang aku nak utarakan dari aritu lagik.. yang mana satu pilihan anda antara pria budiman dan jantan kabaret? mana mana pompuan pun laa kalau kita tanya soalan ni musti pilih nak pria budiman punye.. tak mau jantan kabaret!!! tapi sedar atau tak, the numbers of pria budiman ni dah makin pupus skarang ni, dek kerana makin ramai lelaki yang jadi jantan kabaret. (teringat plak elham kata smalam, tak bleh imagine lelaki jadik jantan kabaret pakai feather boa! tergelak gelak plak kitorang pas tu!!!)

ok korang, camni kisahnye... aku rasa lebih senang aku citer ttg jantan kabaret dlu laa baru pria budiman sbb knowing me, point nak mengutuk jantan2 kabaret ni memang ada je.. memang laju tahap internet broadband gitu~!

jantan kabaret ni bkanlaa jantan kabaret as in penari penari kat gay burlesque ke apa ke.. pakai feather boa with huge straw hats ke apa ke.. though that view is kinda interesting to see :p.. ok sapa tgk citer cinta luar biasa sure tau punye laa perkataan jantan kabaret ni, senang citer ia membawa maksud lelaki tak guna. hampeh tahap tak ingat la. kalau baling kat sungai memang ikan pun tak hingin nak makan.

tapi camana plak kriteria jantan kabaret ni? senang citer ialah lelaki yang tak worth even one milisecond of your precious time. yang dayus. yang mempergunakan perempuan perempuan (perasan tak plural tu) untuk kepentingan diri dia. dan mempergunakan aset yang dia ada untuk dapat apa yang dia nak. though part ni mungkin ramai yang akan terasa kan.. but benda2 camni pun kena perlu dihalusi gak...

pada aku.. kalau lelaki tu very open about himself, as in dia memang gatal and dia tunjuk dia mmg gatal.. in other words he is being himself, then i would accept him just the way he is. kita kena ske kat orang tu sebagai diri dia. pada saya, pria budiman tak semstinya yang beriman dan berbudi bahasa (ok generally memang laa orang akan kata ini laa ciri pria budiman kan?) sebab level kebudimanan seorang lelaki itu datangnya daripada perlakuan yang ikhlas dan hati yang jujur. so mungkin nampak dia tu laser tahap nuklear tapi sebenarnye hati dia baik. dia ikhlas dan jujur dalam tindak tanduknya. yelaa daripada pilih lelaki yang nampak dari luarannya baik pijak semut tak mati, tapi sebenarnye gatal ya rabbi? haa... camana tu?

sebab pengalaman berkenalan dengan camacam perangai orang telah menyebabkan saya dapat sum up benda ni. mungkin ada yang terasa dengan komen saya, tapi itulah yang saya fikir. kebenaran memang pahit, tapi kita kena terima ia seadanya kan?

untuk rakan wanita sekalian.. berhati - hatilah dengan jantan kabaret nih!!!

recap. and more recaps!

2005-04-06T17:43:00.000+08:00

ok.. memula tgk number of visitor kat blog ni arini mmg terkejut beruk laa.. sbb skali 276 ko.... ramainye... tak sangke my life pun interesting utk dibace. yelaa i have no life anyhoo.. balik2 same ol stori the mori jugak ehehehe.. tapi kepada yang membace blog ni tu.. do drop me a line erk.. nak say thank you! and i appreciate any comments that you guys give me. btol!

ok recaps on things happened recently:

a) watched he is cool like 4 to 5 times already including last night and jatuh cinta tergolek kat karakter hero dia... memang ultimate lelaki pujaan laa.. skali pandang cam jantan kabaret, dua kali pandang pria budiman rupanye.. memang akan tgk lagi dan lagi!!!

b) just finished my xm smalam.. alhamdulillah.. doakanlaa sanye pas erk!

c) elham's bday smalam. buat surprise masa midnite besday dier eheheh.. smalam kitorang kuar bertiga je dgn fadhlin gi kl... makan kat restoran insaf (memang sedap gile!) dan soping la sket2 kat petaling street tuu.. sbb murah gile tau2 jam ada dua kat tangan.. tapi xdala cam elham siap pakai dua2 skali eheheh.. tergelak2 aku smalam heheh.. anyhoo we had a blast laa smalam.. though kepenatan giler andbangun lewat giler :P

d) bekerja di pusat pembangunan dan kepimpinan pelajar uitm sampai jun ni.. SKP je... had fun. sangat rilek. dengar orang lain skp kat tpt lain kejenye teruk jugek. alhamdulillah i love this place :)

e) nak tulih lagi kat blog ni.. tapi nak buat keje lain plak. sori!